I don't know how anyone who has taken their fair share of drugs can still be precious about taking a shit.

I was at a day and night outdoor party recently and had railed some very dubious marching powder. Sure enough, I soon felt something toxic brewing in my innards and ran off to the toilet, which turned out to be a solitary unisex toilet. As I was waiting, a considerable queue gathered behind me, comprised entirely of attractive young women. I got in there and instantly knew I would have to take a heinous drug shit. And it was a bad one. It took a few minutes to sort myself out, and these naive bitches were knocking on the door, asking what the hell was going on in there. I looked around for some air freshener, but there was nothing. No window to jump out of, nowhere to hide. In the end, I had to flush, step out into the hallway with a crowd of incredulous 20 year old students staring at me, stride past them and mutter "Enjoy" as I left a horrific stench and a thoroughly befouled bowl in my wake.

Embarrassing as hell on one level, but I figured that anyone who's ever taken drugs has been in the same boat. Shit happens. Compared to that, taking a noisily anonymous shit next to an unknown coworker is practically equivalent to asking about their weekend over the water cooler.

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Mixes:
> Back To Deep [Deep Trippy House]
> Terra Nova [Modern Progressive Trance]
> Rough & Ready [Modern Trance]
>A Different Energy [Good Modern Trance]
> The Edale Mix [Panoramic Beats]

Club dumps have been some of my most satisfying, oh my God. Taking a crap as your roll is kicking in, fuck. Pleasure city, amazing high.

Really? I find it can kill the buzz a bit. Taking a piss, on the other hand...

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Mixes:
> Back To Deep [Deep Trippy House]
> Terra Nova [Modern Progressive Trance]
> Rough & Ready [Modern Trance]
>A Different Energy [Good Modern Trance]
> The Edale Mix [Panoramic Beats]

Yeah for real. It's like instant high for me. And def pissing too. Whenever I had trouble pissing cause of strong pills, I learned that if I visualized the McDonald's drive through menu my body would relax and I'd take the biggest, most satisfying piss. Worked every time.

Last edited by Silky Johnson on Aug-01-2017 at 21:53

I'm talking about shits so good you wish your best friends were with you to experience it. Lol.

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J heinous drug shit

Perfect terminology, lol. Definitely been there before.

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Sucks to have to take one of those euphoria shits when the party is in a warehouse and all they have is the port-a-johnny's and there no toilet paper to be seen.

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201

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J I don't know how anyone who has taken their fair share of drugs can still be precious about taking a shit. I was at a day and night outdoor party recently and had railed some very dubious marching powder. Sure enough, I soon felt something toxic brewing in my innards and ran off to the toilet, which turned out to be a solitary unisex toilet. As I was waiting, a considerable queue gathered behind me, comprised entirely of attractive young women. I got in there and instantly knew I would have to take a heinous drug shit. And it was a bad one. It took a few minutes to sort myself out, and these naive bitches were knocking on the door, asking what the hell was going on in there. I looked around for some air freshener, but there was nothing. No window to jump out of, nowhere to hide. In the end, I had to flush, step out into the hallway with a crowd of incredulous 20 year old students staring at me, stride past them and mutter "Enjoy" as I left a horrific stench and a thoroughly befouled bowl in my wake. Embarrassing as hell on one level, but I figured that anyone who's ever taken drugs has been in the same boat. Shit happens. Compared to that, taking a noisily anonymous shit next to an unknown coworker is practically equivalent to asking about their weekend over the water cooler.

Amazing.

I was at a festival with a mate and halfway through the night, the shits were calling for both us at the same time (probably that terrible British rail sandwich we had on the way up to leeds).

We head to the toliets a.k.a the portapotty shit dungeons and there's two free, by an amazing stroke of luck (nothing worse than being mid munt, and trying to control the turtlenecking prairie dog).

I get there a second before him and make my choice of the right door, leaving him the left. About thirty seconds of looking around, trying to contain it all, when my toilette door clicks open and some chick pops out. As I walk toward it, I see the other one click open my mate steps forward ready to drop his payload and out of his dungeon, comes one of the biggest guys I've ever seen in my life, easily 350bs, out of breath and sweating head to toe. They guy pats him on the should as he walks past and just says "sorry mate".

I'm howling with laughter during my dump and he comes out white as a fucking ghost and chunders 5 minutes later.

Life pro tip from that point forward: Always wait to see who gets out of the toilet before you enter.

quote:

Originally posted by wotyzoid Sucks to have to take one of those euphoria shits when the party is in a warehouse and all they have is the port-a-johnny's and there no toilet paper to be seen.

I was at a party in Manchester once and had to queue up to take a dump. Got inside, released the hostages and then realised there was absolutely no toilet paper. I had to repair the worst of the damage using a bunch of shiny ATM balance statements in my wallet, before rejoining the queue, finding another cubicle with paper and finishing the job. Grim.

___________________
Mixes:
> Back To Deep [Deep Trippy House]
> Terra Nova [Modern Progressive Trance]
> Rough & Ready [Modern Trance]
>A Different Energy [Good Modern Trance]
> The Edale Mix [Panoramic Beats]

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J I was at a party in Manchester once and had to queue up to take a dump. Got inside, released the hostages and then realised there was absolutely no toilet paper. I had to repair the worst of the damage using a bunch of shiny ATM balance statements in my wallet, before rejoining the queue, finding another cubicle with paper and finishing the job. Grim.

I was in the same position at a rave many years ago, sadly sans ATM paperwork. I had to wipe myself clean with my underwear and spent the rest of the party...

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quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J I don't know how anyone who has taken their fair share of drugs can still be precious about taking a shit. I was at a day and night outdoor party recently and had railed some very dubious marching powder. Sure enough, I soon felt something toxic brewing in my innards and ran off to the toilet, which turned out to be a solitary unisex toilet. As I was waiting, a considerable queue gathered behind me, comprised entirely of attractive young women. I got in there and instantly knew I would have to take a heinous drug shit. And it was a bad one. It took a few minutes to sort myself out, and these naive bitches were knocking on the door, asking what the hell was going on in there. I looked around for some air freshener, but there was nothing. No window to jump out of, nowhere to hide. In the end, I had to flush, step out into the hallway with a crowd of incredulous 20 year old students staring at me, stride past them and mutter "Enjoy" as I left a horrific stench and a thoroughly befouled bowl in my wake. Embarrassing as hell on one level, but I figured that anyone who's ever taken drugs has been in the same boat. Shit happens. Compared to that, taking a noisily anonymous shit next to an unknown coworker is practically equivalent to asking about their weekend over the water cooler.

amazing.

club toilets are fucking horrible. i reckon 9 of the worst 10 shits i've ever taken were a pills + club combo. and not just because some cunt called jack had been in there before me lol.

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