So I go to the eye doctor (40 minutes away because we are on an island) and she squirts in some medicine and straps some fucking eye patch to my face. It lasts maybe an hour before my sweaty face causes it to peel off in the 90 degree weather. Then we have to go BACK to the eye doctor and she performs the correct procedure by putting in a contact lens and prescribing some special eye drops. Of course the nearest pharmacy doesn't have the medicine and we wait 30 minutes for them to tell us this. Have to drive another 15 minutes to another and wait another 20 for them to fill it.
Speaking from your long history of dating experience, Kenny?
For your information, the hour and a half during which my eyepatch slipped off I was treating my wife to a seaside lunch complete with calimari, she-crab soup, and clam linguine.
It was just annoying as fuck having to press that damn patch back on my eye only for it to fall off again. I wasn't going to have a perpetual winking face all day so I went back for the contact lens.