haha awesome dervish

what i dont get tho is why is it illegal to drink in public, even if you have the age? im not sure but i dont think it is in sweden, at least i never had any problems with it....

and Squirrelly, love problems sucks i really wish i could say or do something that could help you, but i dont know what that would be. Anyway, i hope things get better soon cause few things sucks as bad as love problems...

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Originally posted by St_Andrew haha awesome dervish what i dont get tho is why is it illegal to drink in public, even if you have the age? im not sure but i dont think it is in sweden, at least i never had any problems with it....

It's not in Vegas!!!

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Originally posted by squirrelly It's not in Vegas!!!

Go vegas

Well since the drama is flowing right now, I might as well add to it. I'm so fucking pissed because I ended up sleeping with my ex last night. It's not like I don't like getting laid, but I'm past the stage of casual hookups, and I'm looking for something more meaningful (yes I'm like a woman now). The sad fact is that I simply don't have respect for my ex in the relationship sense anymore. Yes I still hang out with her, I'm still friends with her, etc., but I know everything she's done since we broke up, and I simply don't think she's the type of person I want to be intimate with ... in other words she's become a slut. The problem is is that she's hot and I'm weak especially when I'm drunk. And when I start drinking my fucking princples fly out the goddamn window.

Eh I know what you're all thinking, look at me, I'm whining about getting laid ... boofuckinghoo. But I think at the same time that some people here can understand what I'm saying because you all seem to have value systems that you try to adhere to ... you're not willing to stoop to the lowest common denominator in order to maximize personal gain, otherwise you would all be spamming the COR, sucking up to everything with a vagina like a lot of the tools do.

Sorry to hear about your troubles Sara. I would advise that you don't jump to conclusions before you fully understand his situation. The lazy mind likes to think the worst, but maybe he just needs some time alone to think about what kind of committment he's ready for at this point. I know it sucks that you're trying to help him out and all your efforts seem to go completely unappreciated, but I would say that we've all had points in a relationship where we're so preoccupied with our own personal problems that we're simply oblivious to the things others are doing to try to help out. Of course if he is actually deciding whether he's ready to committ towards you by checking out his other "options" than he's an asshole who never really had the respect for you that you should demand.

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Originally posted by Dervish You know what that sounds like to me (without the facts obviously)? He wants to break up but can't do it. Either because he can't as in emotionally, that is he thinks (as in his head says, perhaps for some practical reason) it would be a good idea but he can't because he likes you too much, or because he just can't because he can't bring himself to say it to you. And he's trying to get you to do it for him.

Hmmmmmm........This sounds familar

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Originally posted by squirrelly I do understand the problem with sleeping with people you really don't want to because of alcohol or whatever the factor may be that renders you into making horrible decisions.

Eh, I have no problems not sleeping with people I don't want to sleep with because I don't respect them. With her it's just a little bit complicated because I used to respect her for the person that she was as opposed to the person that she's become.

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That post right there however, just left me in a position of being utterly terrified. At the end of June, he's going on a little four day vacation to another city. A person who lives in that particular city, is his ex girlfriend. Now, she has become nothing other than an absolute whore. (Literally, it is well known she has been paid for sex) However, she still calls. Often. At first I wasn't worried because when I'm around my ex boyfriend I realize that I have no intentions of ever getting back together with him for I am simply not attracted to him any longer and too much went wrong. However, that post just made me realize that all those times I've seen my ex, I've been sober. Lord knows what I would have done if I was drunk, or messed up otherwise. It made me realize just how much he'll be drinking while he's there. This can't/won't be good.

Sorry . If it makes you feel any better, our situations are completely different. I don't have a SO right now. I don't even have anyone I'm remotely interested in. If I was with someone I actually cared about, not even the sweetest ambrosia (jaeger? ) could convince me to hurt someone like that. Even they never found out, I couldn't respect myself. So if you have a good feel on the guy, trust in your instincts (assuming your instincts are generally good). Don't second guess him based upon other peoples' experiences.

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However, I have been there before, and I'm sorry that that happened. She doesn't want anything more than that one time does she? One wanting something more and one not brings nothing but problems... I'm a prime example. How long did you two date? A long time, no?

We dated for 4 years. She doesn't want anything more than random casual hookups when she needs to get laid. I'm looking for a relationship that will lead to something. Personally, I'd rather have sex with myself than send my dick to a youth hostel .

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I'm not jumping to any conclusions. I actually know exactly where he stands, and that's perhaps why this is so frustrating. The fact that I DO know what he's doing, and I DO know what all of this means, and it's just frustrating that he cannot just let go of the past and move on with the future. I am not his ex girlfriend, and I will never be like her. She broke his heart, and he's refusing to mend it. In the end, he's no better than her, however, for he hurts others (i.e. me) as he goes along with life as well.

Yea excess baggage definetely sucks for the third party. I've decided it will never become an issue for me. I will always care about my ex and be there for her as much as I can, but I refuse to let her stand in the way of bigger and better things for me. After all, things didn't work out for a reason right?

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Very true. Maybe it's this damn city, everyone that lives in Orlando seems to be incapable of having a healthy, fun, and lasting relationship. I'm tired of the mind games, I'd much perfer it if people would just turn in their cowardly ways for one night and found the courage to admit the way they really feel. But you see, right there I am being a hypocrite, for I, myself, am nothing other than a coward.

Eh, love is cowardices' bedfellow. As for Orlando, how many times have I told you to come to DC???

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Last edited by occrider on Jun-05-2005 at 08:39

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Originally posted by Renegade Apologies for my arrogation of this thread from our beloved sister forum, but I thought it'd be an interesting topic to discuss here amongst the incorrigible machismo of the PDD: when was the last time you (yes you, tough guy!) actually cried? I haven't cried properly (i.e. proper tears rolling down my cheeks, whimperng and so forth) since I was about 10 or 11, but I've come close a couple of times. The first was just after my parents split up when I was about 17 (they're still married five years on, btw - god only knows why) and I was harbouring a lot of resentment towards my dad for the part he played in the split (and - without going into details - it was predominantly his fault). Anyway, I had a dream one night about him dying and a couple of the images (not of him dying, but of the life he had led) really stuck in my mind. It's difficult to describe (even though I'm sure you all understand the sensation) just how vivid and demonstrative dreams can be, but I woke up in the middle of the night and spent the next few hours just thinking - in an endless loop - about just how much he had done for me. As much as I love my mum, I understand that most of who I am has to do with what my dad has taught me over the years. Everything from my love of science (he's a geologist), to my love of philosophy and literature (even though I've probably - without any hint of arrogance - excelled beyond him in my love and comprehension of the former, he was still the one who introduced me to it), to my political orientation (he's a bit of an old-school socialist, which I've largely outgrown, but his humanitarianism and his skepticism towards political authority I've largely retained over the years), he was the one who groomed me into the impeccable human being you see before you right now. While I went to bed resenting him, after dreaming about his death, I spent the rest of the night in that emotional state that is so easy to reach when you're tired but unable to sleep, just thinking about him, how much he'd done for me and how the rift between him and my mum, ultimately, shouldn't change what he meant to me. I came close to tears just thinking about it. (How's that for sappy, eh...? ) The only other time I can remember coming close to tears recently, was reading the conclusion of Albert Camus' First Man only a couple of months ago. I'm rarely emotionally moved by mere words, but this one really got to me. Most people probably wouldn't get it, but everything kind of culminated in the last couple of chapters and it really stirred me emotionally. The reasons why: Camus has always (well for the past 4-5 years at least) been a hero of mine and this was the last of his major works I'd still yet to read. The semi-autobiographical book was a vivid description of the pleasures he'd enjoyed throughout an adverse childhood and it culminates with a letter written to him, as an adult, by the teacher who was so influential in his development as a person (Camus, never having known his own father, saw him as a father figure) and Camus' response to it (both of which, it goes without saying, are incredibly touching). The last chapter was just this raw (raw because he never got the chance to revise it) flurry of words detailing Camus' incomprehnsible passion for life and you read it knowing that the book it was contained within was never finished because he died prematurely in a car-crash in 1961. The words you read about how precious every senstation in life is, were probably the last he wrote before he died. I know it doesn't sound like much, but all these three elements came to a head at the end and I was having a hard time holding back the tears at the back of the bus that day (yeah, I was on a bus - could you imagine how it would have looked if I'd started bawling? ). Anyway, enough about me. When was the last time you cried?

Hmmmm well I've done the half-ass crying a few times every now and then. The one where you shed half a tear or two and regain composure quite quickly because it was a temporary emotional lapse. The most recent was soon after I broke up with my ex and I was going through a particularly bad/lonley phase in my life. The time before that was when I saw the movie Life Is Beautiful hehe. I don't know what it was about that movie that evoked tears. I think that what it was is that I completely emphasized with the main character that Benigni played. I would try to shelter a loved one from a horrible situation in a similar manner, even if that person couldn't/didn't appreciate everything you've done. Such unrewarding unselfishness in the face of such demanding sacrifice was simply touching.

I don't actually cry often, but the last time I cried seriously must have been about 7 or 8 years ago. At that point I had major problems with my mother that escalated to the point where she chased me around the house trying to throw a chair at me and inevitably ended up trying to choke me. I'm not going into it more than that, but I was an unappreciative asshole and she was a controlling bitch. Things have worked out since fortunately.

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Retro ...

quote:

Originally posted by zig Hmmmmmm........This sounds familar

Hey hey hey I told her, she just didn't understand and I didn't realise she hadn't. Still feel bad about it though cos from her end it must have seemed really shitty.



With respect to crying I don't think I'll ever really cry. Just before new year (last year) I got woken in the night (having been out that night too) by the cops and taken down to the hospital (in a police car) where I was told that my mums "chances" where very slim to none.

Bearing in mind I'd just been round at hers that day and she was totally fine then it would have probebly been about the most appropriate time to cry ever but I didn't.

Dunno why part shock part responciblity (mum and dad divorced, older bro is not exactly responcible and a younger bro) because weirdly that day she told me I was her executor (and what happened to her was totally not predictable) for her life insurance and so on.

My little brother was in bits, my older one was just sure she'd be alright (he was right but at the time the docs were telling us it was very very unlikely), but I honestly thought that was it. But if when to bits it would have been worse for my little bro I think. Still weird that I didn't cry atall I think (nearly did at one point though). Plus various stuff happend while she was getting better involving her memory that were kinda tough and I didn't.

She is alright now basicly, but at the time it really did seem like she was gone.

Glad to hear the relationship with your mum has got better Occrider, cos I know that at that time I started thinking about every single bad thing I'd ever said to her. And you can't take it back or change anything once they are gone.

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Originally posted by occrider The time before that was when I saw the movie Life Is Beautiful hehe. I don't know what it was about that movie that evoked tears. I think that what it was is that I completely emphasized with the main character that Benigni played. I would try to shelter a loved one from a horrible situation in a similar manner, even if that person couldn't/didn't appreciate everything you've done. Such unrewarding unselfishness in the face of such demanding sacrifice was simply touching.

That movie is such a genious one, totally love it

Eh, your situation really sucks, Sara. But everyone pretty much said anything that I would say here, so I suppose you can just imagine I said something like that

As for crying..hmm, I think the last time was when my first girl dumped me..

My parents got split up too (although they're officially still married), but I was all happy when my mom kicked my dad out of the flat. It's a long story, although kinda funny in an obscure way. Let's just say it involves hand grenades, large sums of money, sex with cousins, and a guy whose last name was Baboon. And no, I'm not joking here

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Originally posted by DrUg_Tit0 Eh, your situation really sucks, Sara. But everyone pretty much said anything that I would say here, so I suppose you can just imagine I said something like that As for crying..hmm, I think the last time was when my first girl dumped me.. My parents got split up too (although they're officially still married), but I was all happy when my mom kicked my dad out of the flat. It's a long story, although kinda funny in an obscure way. Let's just say it involves hand grenades, large sums of money, sex with cousins, and a guy whose last name was Baboon. And no, I'm not joking here

That was the funniest thing I've read in a long time!

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Originally posted by occrider Eh, I have no problems not sleeping with people I don't want to sleep with because I don't respect them. With her it's just a little bit complicated because I used to respect her for the person that she was as opposed to the person that she's become.

That's more or less what I meant.

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Sorry . If it makes you feel any better, our situations are completely different. I don't have a SO right now. I don't even have anyone I'm remotely interested in. If I was with someone I actually cared about, not even the sweetest ambrosia (jaeger? ) could convince me to hurt someone like that. Even they never found out, I couldn't respect myself. So if you have a good feel on the guy, trust in your instincts (assuming your instincts are generally good). Don't second guess him based upon other peoples' experiences.

I'm second guessing him based on his actions and decisions during the past few weeks. I think you and I need to down a bottle of Jaeger sometime soon

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We dated for 4 years. She doesn't want anything more than random casual hookups when she needs to get laid. I'm looking for a relationship that will lead to something. Personally, I'd rather have sex with myself than send my dick to a youth hostel .

Personally, I don't understand "when she needs to get laid". I don't understand that statement in any situation. Yes, sex is wonderful, it's fantastic, and I love it, but I'm not about to have it with someone because I "need to get laid". I'd much rather have sex with someone I know, and trust, and care about than some stranger, or even an ex. With ex's there's simply too much emotional involvement because there's usually a serious history. You broke up for a reason, why go and stir things up again? With strangers I'd be too terrified of diseases with the way everyone is whoring themselves around nowadays.

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Yea excess baggage definetely sucks for the third party. I've decided it will never become an issue for me. I will always care about my ex and be there for her as much as I can, but I refuse to let her stand in the way of bigger and better things for me. After all, things didn't work out for a reason right?

Exactly.

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Eh, love is cowardices' bedfellow. As for Orlando, how many times have I told you to come to DC???

You SO ditched me the last time you were here in Orlando!!!! What if you ditch me when I go up to DC? I was in DC last Sept and I didn't see you.

___________________
aka Tits McGee
aka Chesty LaRue
aka Busty St. Claire