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On-line cheating ...???
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| Stylez |
Just wanted to know all of your opinions on on-line cheating.
What is your definition of on-line cheating??
I'm curious to know... and see if I share the same point of view as some of you... or if I'm insane!!!
I beleive that any action (this includes words)... that induces.. or stimulates a response from the opposite sex to retort in a seductive..or propositional way... is considered cheating.
I know that we all know what's right from wrong... and if it feels wrong... it probably is. That's because your conscience is letting u know that u're going against what u believe is right and wrong.
Just my take...
What's yours?? |
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| Prototrance |
| If no physical contact occurs then I dont think it is cheating - I think what you are describing is more online flirting. |
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| kirbtastic |
| quote: | Originally posted by Stylez
Just wanted to know all of your opinions on on-line cheating.
What is your definition of on-line cheating??
I'm curious to know... and see if I share the same point of view as some of you... or if I'm insane!!!
I beleive that any action (this includes words)... that induces.. or stimulates a response from the opposite sex to retort in a seductive..or propositional way... is considered cheating.
I know that we all know what's right from wrong... and if it feels wrong... it probably is. That's because your conscience is letting u know that u're going against what u believe is right and wrong.
Just my take...
What's yours?? |
wow u r stiff...i think its ok to flirt with online people and strippers as long as nothing physical happens and you go home to the person u r with. i would go to strip clubs all the time with my friends..i would always tell my girlfriend though...sometimes she came with us..she even bought me a lap dance..but i would nevre get a lap dance when i went by myself.
i guess what im saying is as long as you are honest about your flirting its ok. |
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| Stylez |
interesting....
but when does flirting cross the line??
So far..only 2 responses.. and they're from the male perspective. I'd like to hear what some of the females have to say on this subject. Also, do either of you have gf's?? and if so... u're telling me that u wouldn't mine if I spoke to them on-line and flirted/or/hit on them??
Not that I'm suggesting I do that... just clarifying. |
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| JohnSmith |
A very interesting question.
I used to believe it was OK to flirt online, as long as you didn't have physical contact. However, i have since changed my mind.
I am in a committed relationship, and will be married to my fiance in a few months. we have been together for 8 years.
A year or so ago, i started an online relationship with a girl i met in school. We flirted with each other, on an increasing basis for several months. it was nothing major, not cybersex or anything, but it was an emotional relationship. i began to care about her, and her about me. I was starting to sense that i would have to break things off after I realized that i looked forward to talking to her. then she sent me an email saying she had always wanted me, and asked me to dump my girlfriend for her.
I then told her to get out of my life. It was unfortunate, because i did care about her as a friend, but she ruined that friendship.
There was no physical contact, but this SEVERLY damaged my relationship. I told my girlfriend all about it, how we had talked, and how i had shot her down. however, even the suggestion that i had flirted with another girl really hurt my girlfriend. to this day, if she hears that name, she feels hurt. and she doesn't trust me either, i have made a deep wound in my relationship, and for that i am truly sorry.
flirting is not cheating, there is a difference, but flirting is far from harmless. if you let it go to far, the person you are flirting with can replace in your heart the person you are with, and then, your relationship will surely fail. I was barely able to save mine, and i hope my post may convince other people to stop and think for a minute, about what they want, and what the consequences of their actions may be. |
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| bassaholix |
This is difficult to pin it to the point, you just have to know that flirting is ok, as long as you don't overstep that line that shouldn't be crossed..
And if you do.. prepare yourself for a *cyber slap* lol |
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| kirbtastic |
| quote: | Originally posted by JohnSmith
A very interesting question.
I used to believe it was OK to flirt online, as long as you didn't have physical contact. However, i have since changed my mind.
I am in a committed relationship, and will be married to my fiance in a few months. we have been together for 8 years.
A year or so ago, i started an online relationship with a girl i met in school. We flirted with each other, on an increasing basis for several months. it was nothing major, not cybersex or anything, but it was an emotional relationship. i began to care about her, and her about me. I was starting to sense that i would have to break things off after I realized that i looked forward to talking to her. then she sent me an email saying she had always wanted me, and asked me to dump my girlfriend for her.
I then told her to get out of my life. It was unfortunate, because i did care about her as a friend, but she ruined that friendship.
There was no physical contact, but this SEVERLY damaged my relationship. I told my girlfriend all about it, how we had talked, and how i had shot her down. however, even the suggestion that i had flirted with another girl really hurt my girlfriend. to this day, if she hears that name, she feels hurt. and she doesn't trust me either, i have made a deep wound in my relationship, and for that i am truly sorry.
flirting is not cheating, there is a difference, but flirting is far from harmless. if you let it go to far, the person you are flirting with can replace in your heart the person you are with, and then, your relationship will surely fail. I was barely able to save mine, and i hope my post may convince other people to stop and think for a minute, about what they want, and what the consequences of their actions may be. |
that is not flirting..that is cheating. u let feeling get involved and also did it behing your girlfriends back. ive been flirting with a girl online for 2 years..she lives in Pennsylvania..we have a good time talking..but when i lay in bed at night i never think about her or ever thought about breaking up with someone for her. |
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| irish_4_you |
It all depends. Some people flirty for fun. If its all for fun, then its ok cause its meaningless. If it means anything to the person flirting, then its excessive. Any flirting with substance is more than flirting for fun.
Irish |
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| JohnSmith |
| quote: | Originally posted by kirbtastic
that is not flirting..that is cheating. |
well, i wouldn't call it cheating. I consider cheating to be kissing, touching, f*cking. i think those are certainly WORSE than having a few thoughts about a person or getting a goofy smile when the complement you.
however, it is a matter of semantics only. What i did was bad, and i will never do it again, no matter what you call it. |
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| Arbiter |
A relationship that can be damaged by words alone probably isn't one worth maintaining, if you ask me. But what's really important is to make sure you and your partner understand each others expectations for behavior. Personally, I don't think I'd ever be happy in a relationship with a woman who thought she was justified in telling me what kind of internet correspondances I ought to be keeping. It shows a lack of trust, and to me, if a woman doesn't trust me, she doesn't respect me. I don't think that's the basis for a healthy relationship.
Perhaps I have a very liberal perspective on the way relationships ought to be, but I think the notion that partners in a long term relationship should have to sacrifice freedom in order to be together is outdated in this day and age. I think that through communication, understanding, and openness, we can achieve healthy long term relationships where these kind of strict controls are not necessary.
If my girlfriend wanted to flirt with other guys online, I wouldn't have a problem with it, provided that she wasn't going out of her way to hide it from me, and I know she would provide me with the same degree of trust and freedom that I allow her. We are secure enough with ourselves and with each other that we don't feel threatened by that sort of activity. I think that is an essential component of a good relationship, and I think that if it's lacking, it is a sign of more profound underlying problems.
Regards,
Arbiter |
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| GeneDefekt |
| quote: | Originally posted by irish_4_you
It all depends. Some people flirty for fun. If its all for fun, then its ok cause its meaningless.
Any flirting with substance is more than flirting for fun.
Irish |
I agree. When you commit yourself in a mature and committed relationship, RESPECT is a major factor. I think that people have the right of privacy, but once that privacy goes over the lines of respect and gets in between, it will eventually lead to serious confrontational issues.
I mean put yourself in the other persons shoes and see how you would feel.
That's just how I see it.
Keep it real. |
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| Spyder |
in my honest opion i think the only way u can cheat online is by the two ppl having true and intamet conversations
so for example.. Bill and Jill are going out..(in person) Jill starts talking with Fred (online) and they start getting to know each other and start likeing each other.. and begin to get in the mood of being with each other..
If BOTH (and i emphazise on the both) TRUELY MADLY DEEPLY think that they can doo somthing with each other and want too then yes i say THAT is online Cheating.. So Jill is cheating on Bill with Fred..
I say any sort of CYBER sex is considered online cheating..
now lest say Bill and Jill are going out.. and Jill starts talking with Fred and they begin to know each other and begin saying.. stuff like "/me huggles Fred tightly" only as a friendly/joking sorta away.. then it's fine.. it's not ONline cheating..
So any Asss kissing or jokingly snogging .. i dont see that as being a Defenition of Online Cheating..
becuase Friends are friends and its fun to joke around with them online.. but when it's in person it wont happen..
on the other hand if stuff like snoging fluggles cuddles.. or wotever.. are preformed in and outside of the Net.. then ya.. it's Cheating..
Now dating online.. is another matter.. which i dont have the brain power to go into deatil with it.. at this moment.. i will get back too it.. EVENtualy..
:crazy: |
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