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Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 05:58:

Need to piss off room mate

so I'm in college. I got a new room mate, probably the strangest and creeepiest kid ever. He's like napoleon dynamite except he smells, is very social inept, and isn't entertaining at the least. he is ALWAYS in the room and i feel weird bringing a girl back with him in there, because I know he will jack off in the corner.

So basically I need to get this kid out. My friends suggested taking a shit on his bed, and blasting obnoxious music at odd hours of the night.

What do you guys suggest?

btw here's a pic

Posted by FuzzyChicken on Sep-09-2005 06:01:

talk to him like a normal person? work out a plan, and communicate.

Posted by Mr. Pink on Sep-09-2005 06:02:

dude, this is easy.

you want to get rid of him in a way that will ease him out.

slowly, and by 'slowly' I mean a week

play your music loud. Play trance.
if he likes it.

play house

if he likes that...

...then play some gabber or something

Either way, be more annoying yourself. Get on HIS nerves, but dont be to obvious. Just be your true self

Regardless, you want to make this kids life a living hell. Start talkin about drugs. Ask him if HE'S ever fuked a Vietnamese Prostitute.....if he says yes, ask him if she was 8yrs old too!!

In the end, if everything fails.........tell him your "inner homo" has come out of its closet.......

.....and you find him attractive

Good luck!!!

Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 06:03:

quote:
Originally posted by FuzzyChicken
talk to him like a normal person? work out a plan, and communicate.

and say what? "Dude, you need to shower, do laundry, make friends, ge tout of the room. stop being so damn creepy and weird and feminine"
no. that won't work. plus it's more fun to fuck with him

right now he's trying to sleep and im' blasting 2pac

Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 06:05:

quote:
Originally posted by Mr. Pink

In the end, if everything fails.........tell him your "inner homo" has come out of its closet.......

.....and you find him attractive

Good luck!!!

did i mention he's very feminine? he told me he had a girlfriend once i was like dude no way, he got kinda offended

i wouldn't be suprised if he's a closet homo

Posted by Mr. Pink on Sep-09-2005 06:09:

quote:
Originally posted by Haunted
did i mention he's very feminine? he told me he had a girlfriend once i was like dude no way, he got kinda offended

i wouldn't be suprised if he's a closet homo

Check this out.

When i first got to college I was stuck in a weird set-up.

2 rooms, 1 Common room, and 1 Bathroom.

in each room 2 people could live in....making it 4 total to share the common room and a bathroom (big bathroom, tho)

ok so my first year i had a room mate, and in the 2nd room lived only 1 guy.

My roomie was such a fag....cept im serious. He was gay.

I had no issue cuz he didnt hit on me, so it was all good. I didnt mind. Im not homophobic.

Now, my "suitemate".....he lived alone in the 2nd room. He was a homosexual as well. LMAO

so here i was, fresh off the island....living with two homosexuals.

best part about it was..........the two of them HATED each other. So I'd constantly be present during their little homosexual battles

i dont know whats worse.........

.....coming to America and living with two homosexuals.

.......or coming to America and finding out that the guys fight like women

Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 06:12:

i have nothing against gays. just this kid so creepy and feminine. he was sitting crosslegged today singing along to the rent soundtrack (with headphones of course since i was blasting the latest Tiesto essential set)

it gets really hot in here. and i have a fan, so if i leave, i can take it with me. hahaha, sweat him out

hahah what about putting an open condom near his bed on the floor. hahaha

Posted by kfergs on Sep-09-2005 06:14:

burn his toothbrush, shit in his shoes, delete buncha shit on his computer, fuck you girl real hard while hes in the room, leave strange white-powder lines around, put super glue on his headphones when he gets up and well when he puts them back on you know the rest, put shampoo in his "shower caddy" (not sure if he carries one of those around the dorm lol but my gf does), leave random pics of naked boys on your desktop, make a slideshow screensaver of women preforming sexual acts for animals... rape him?

Posted by Mr. Pink on Sep-09-2005 06:16:

dude
fart on him and think its funny

eat sushi and "avocado".......tell him the green stuff you got with your sushi "wasabi" is really avacado.....then give it to him as it is a beautiful delicary (ive done this).......upon eating a "small" chunk of avocado- he will realize he truly ate a big chunk of WASABI

it never fails, my friend

Posted by Orbax on Sep-09-2005 06:18:

never stop playing this

www.vaginalterrorist.com

Posted by Spacey Orange on Sep-09-2005 06:19:

simple, get your own place. chances are he feels the same way about you.

Posted by Mr. Pink on Sep-09-2005 06:19:

quote:
Originally posted by Orbax
never stop playing this

www.vaginalterrorist.com
shut up!!!!!!!!

no games!

you want games

i got yo games

right hurrrrrrrrrr

c'mon orbax, ill philosophize you to death!

Posted by FuzzyChicken on Sep-09-2005 06:22:

well last year in the dorms there was this white kid rooming with this really nerdy asian kid who smelled and made weird breathing noises and was all into that anime crap, etc. Nobdoy really liked him, and his roomate would make fun of him, and everyone treat him like crap. But it wouldnt affect him too much.

But as far as your problem goes, I would find out what he likes and then ruin that. Does he like his sleep? if so play loud music late, etc. Does he like his computer, do something like that (lemon party him or goatse just go to wikipedia and type shock sites :P) and do other stuff to mess with this comp.

So basicly find what he likes or charishes and destroy it.

Posted by MarathonMan on Sep-09-2005 06:30:

quote:
Originally posted by FuzzyChicken
talk to him like a normal person? work out a plan, and communicate.

+1

The thread starter sounds like an immature twat

Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 06:32:

rofl im blasting techno he was like can you turn that down you can use my head phones. i turn to him and i'm like. I won't use your head phones. and turned around. he mumbled something and went back to bed

he cherishes his computer, but i can't fuck with that. that's not the right way to get him to leave. he can tell housing that i was touching his stuff..

but if i do stuff like leave condoms on the floor near his bed, or play loud music, or have people over.. stuff like that. then i can't get in trouble

Posted by Mr. Pink on Sep-09-2005 06:35:

yeah Haunted, u get the idea.
dont be physical
dont touch his shit
nothing like that.

you need to bring girls to the room no matter what!
EVEN IF YOU FEEL UNCOMFY!

thats how i got rid of my roomie junior year :

do your shit as if he didnt exist!!!

that way, you end up with a free room, a single! whats better than that?

i always thought, ok.......put this dude through some torture, but then i get a free room. It evens out. I'm not an ass, but hey, i wanna be comfortable.

Worst case scenario- they put you through some sort of exchange student program because you have a free room....and the exchange students needs a place to say.

.......upon which .......you repeat the steps aforementioned

Posted by kfergs on Sep-09-2005 06:40:

quote:
Originally posted by Mr. Pink
yeah Haunted, u get the idea.
dont be physical
dont touch his shit
nothing like that.

you need to bring girls to the room no matter what!
EVEN IF YOU FEEL UNCOMFY!

thats how i got rid of my roomie junior year :

do your shit as if he didnt exist!!!

that way, you end up with a free room, a single! whats better than that?

i always thought, ok.......put this dude through some torture, but then i get a free room. It evens out. I'm not an ass, but hey, i wanna be comfortable.

Worst case scenario- they put you through some sort of exchange student program because you have a free room....and the exchange students needs a place to say.

.......upon which .......you repeat the steps aforementioned

ROFL

+472

Posted by Allied Nations on Sep-09-2005 06:49:

my bro eneded up having a weird for a roomate freshman year, the kid ended up leaving after 2 months and he got a room to himself!

Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 06:53:

ge tme in touch with your bro
i want to k now exactly what he did

Posted by OurManFlint on Sep-09-2005 06:55:

I had a gay roomate last year that played disney toons and giggled profusley.

Posted by Mr. Pink on Sep-09-2005 06:56:

quote:
Originally posted by OurManFlint
I had a gay roomate last year that played disney toons and giggled profusley.

dude, i lived with TWO gay dudes my freshman year and neither of them did that shit haha

thank god

Posted by Haunted on Sep-09-2005 07:12:

so he left cuz he couldnt sleep (wonder why)

i'm thinking of locking him out and going to bed and not answering

Posted by stren on Sep-09-2005 07:29:

quote:
Originally posted by Mr. Pink

best part about it was..........the two of them HATED each other. So I'd constantly be present during their little homosexual battles

i dont know whats worse.........

.....coming to America and living with two homosexuals.

.......or coming to America and finding out that the guys fight like women

but seriusly, try talking to him

Posted by TigerClaw on Sep-09-2005 07:36:

Seriously, I think you are going to have to deal with it, It is wrong to be judging people at what they do regardless of there taste, If you atempt at anything that would be harsh to the individual, It could get ugly and you might end up murdered. So if I were you, I deal with it and not start any problems cause of what you dont like what your roommate is into.

Posted by superglo on Sep-09-2005 10:34:

yea. .talk to him ALL the time.
drone on endlessly about you love life with your 2nd cousin or some made up shit like that. ask him weird questions like how does he keep his pubic hair so neat and tidy or if he has ever had warts on his nipples or how do you squeeze pimples on your ballsack.

hahah

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