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-- Who should pay for the date? *UPDATED*
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Hehehe I'm starting to like Allegory's way of thinking...


I guess what I'm trying to say is that I never expect any outcome from me paying for the date...especially not sex...if a girl feels obligated to "give me something" in return or if someone who paid feels that he should be repayed...well that's just pathetic really

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Originally posted by starsearcher Hehehe I'm starting to like Allegory's way of thinking... I guess what I'm trying to say is that I never expect any outcome from me paying for the date...especially not sex...if a girl feels obligated to "give me something" in return or if someone who paid feels that he should be repayed...well that's just pathetic really

well either of you is not understanding me.

you can't fight this. it's a natural process. it goes both ways.

why is it so taboo to you to have it be about sex (and it's not about sex per se, it's about the possibility of sex). as far as i know, humans are sexual beings.

it's not about if you pay, and she accepts, or vice versa, that you have to sleep together. it's a delicate interaction with a possibility of sex.

you even admit yourself that if you ask a girl out and pay for the dinner you like her enough to sleep with her.

i'm looking at this in a totally mathematical and biological sense. does no one agree that humans are animals?

No I understand what you are saying...and I have nothing against sex or nothing against talking about it...no taboos here...it's just that when I pay for someone it's NOT becaue of the possibility of sex...sometime in the future. Sex is everywhere and it's REALLY not that hard to find...basically all I'm saying that if i DO pay for someone then it's just because I felt generous, or I wanted to treat someone or etc...nothing to do with sex, or the remote possibility of sex or anything like it... Kind of like Allegory said...

Here is my opinion, a combination of both. Ha just what we need, another opinion !

On a bad date, whoever pays the bill has sex in mind.

On an amazing date you are so interested in the conversation and are so involved in getting to know the person, you don't think about who pays the bill really. Plus you have already made up your mind that you really like this person and you are going to have sex with them way before the dinner is over. You don't care if you pay the bill because the date was so great and you can't wait to go out with this person again.

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Originally posted by PartEgurl On a bad date, whoever pays the bill has sex in mind.

I ALWAYS have sex in mind.

It's not always my goal, and I don't always act on it, and rarely on a first date, if ever on a first date, however, it's always there.

That's just me. Call me sexual vanilla.

I guess I am speaking from a girls point of view, probably all guys are thinking about it !! Thats normal though.

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Originally posted by DigitalMP I ALWAYS have sex in mind. It's not always my goal, and I don't always act on it, and rarely on a first date, if ever on a first date, however, it's always there. That's just me. Call me sexual vanilla.

I think this applies to every male.

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Originally posted by starsearcher No I understand what you are saying...and I have nothing against sex or nothing against talking about it...no taboos here...it's just that when I pay for someone it's NOT becaue of the possibility of sex...sometime in the future. Sex is everywhere and it's REALLY not that hard to find...basically all I'm saying that if i DO pay for someone then it's just because I felt generous, or I wanted to treat someone or etc...nothing to do with sex, or the remote possibility of sex or anything like it... Kind of like Allegory said...

you are just affraid to admit it or you think it would ruin your chances with girls if you did admit it to yourself even.

ask yourself then, why do i feel generous at this time to pay for this date?

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Originally posted by DigitalMP I ALWAYS have sex in mind. It's not always my goal, and I don't always act on it, and rarely on a first date, if ever on a first date, however, it's always there. That's just me. Call me sexual vanilla.

this is a truthful man.

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Originally posted by StereoPrincess you are just affraid to admit it or you think it would ruin your chances with girls if you did admit it to yourself even. ask yourself then, why do i feel generous at this time to pay for this date?

Maybe because I had a really great time....maybe because it would make me feel better...maybe because I just feel like it at this particular time...there can be tons of reasons and sex or the possibility of sex has nothing to do with it... There's nothing to admit it's just a fact....

I have a few friends that can I use at any time as "booty-calls" I can get sex pretty easily...so once again...no I do not think about sex or the possibility of sex when I offer to pay...

You have a certain view of men that we are just all horndogs

Maybe that's true for many of us but I really have nothing to admit, if I'm on a date and I offer to pay (I wonder how many times i said it already...) I am not thinking about the possibility of sex.

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Originally posted by starsearcher Maybe because I had a really great time....maybe because it would make me feel better...maybe because I just feel like it at this particular time...there can be tons of reasons and sex or the possibility of sex has nothing to do with it... There's nothing to admit it's just a fact....

That's a big rolleyes to you too because you obviously can't think outside your box.

not that it has anything to do with it, but i actually took many psych classes and human nature is very interesting to me so i have developed my theories of how men and women interact not just from my head but from actual research into it.

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Originally posted by StereoPrincess That's a big rolleyes to you too because you obviously can't think outside your box. not that it has anything to do with it, but i actually took many psych classes and human nature is very interesting to me so i have developed my theories of how men and women interact not just from my head but from actual research into it.

Okay...so then you are saying that if i offer to pay i'm thinking about sex...

And what if I'm out with a girl and she offers to pay for everything then what is she after?

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Originally posted by Tordan I think this applies to every male.

So you're saying every male will pass up first-date sex? I doubt that.

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Originally posted by DigitalMP So you're saying every male will pass up first-date sex? I doubt that.

It really depends who I'm out on a date with but usually first day sex means I will not be seeing that girl again...however again it depends on the girl

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Originally posted by starsearcher It really depends who I'm out on a date with but usually first day sex means I will not be seeing that girl again...however again it depends on the girl

I agree...I usually give it two or three dates to see how our personalities mesh, then let her know what I'm down for.

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Originally posted by DigitalMP I agree...I usually give it two or three dates to see how our personalities mesh, then let her know what I'm down for.

I just find that if i REALLY like a girl I don't want to jump into bed with her right away...it's weird...

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Originally posted by starsearcher I just find that if i REALLY like a girl I don't want to jump into bed with her right away...it's weird...

hm.. I guess if I truly fell in love with a girl after first date, I probably wouldn't want to jump into bed with her right away..

Why?? Because if I did, I would probably think that she is somewhat slutty cause she slept with me right after first date.

In other words if I fell in love with a girl after first date, I would think better about her if she didn't want to sleep with me right away.

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Originally posted by starsearcher I just find that if i REALLY like a girl I don't want to jump into bed with her right away...it's weird...

or really WANT to like a girl. I've been through way too many relationships to know that I can't get TOO excited until after a few dates.

Well I just find that when I REALLY like a girl, as in have serious feelings for her, and I find her really beautiful per-se I can't think sexually of her...It's like 2 completely different things After some time yes but otherwise no...But if it's just a hottie that I don't really have serious feelings for then sure I'll jump into bed with her...

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Originally posted by starsearcher I just find that if i REALLY like a girl I don't want to jump into bed with her right away...it's weird...

i feel the same.. i dont think its weird tho.. when u like someone a lot, you dont want to pressure them, or risk messing it up i suppose.

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Originally posted by starsearcher Well I just find that when I REALLY like a girl, as in have serious feelings for her, and I find her really beautiful per-se I can't think sexually of her...

i can... but i choose not to act on it so quickly.

so if your with your booty call and you decide to get some pre/post sex food, who pays???

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Originally posted by tha_broad so if your with your booty call and you decide to get some pre/post sex food, who pays???

Hmmmm good question...I never think about it...I personally rarely pay everything I usually split the bill regardless if it's a bootycall or not. The last time that happened we each payed for ourselves...

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Originally posted by starsearcher Well I just find that when I REALLY like a girl, as in have serious feelings for her, and I find her really beautiful per-se I can't think sexually of her...It's like 2 completely different things After some time yes but otherwise no...But if it's just a hottie that I don't really have serious feelings for then sure I'll jump into bed with her...

you have serious feelings after one or two dates?

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Originally posted by tha_broad so if your with your booty call and you decide to get some pre/post sex food, who pays???

it depends who came first, and how many times.

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Originally posted by DigitalMP you have serious feelings after one or two dates?

I guess the way I pictured it was like this (actually happened): I knew this girl for a long time but we were just friends but I had serious feelings for her...and then when the date happened I already had feelings for her...

quote:

Originally posted by starsearcher I guess the way I pictured it was like this (actually happened): I knew this girl for a long time but we were just friends but I had serious feelings for her...and then when the date happened I already had feelings for her...

How'd that work out?

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