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-- FAO: MellyMel (and the 4 other actual women on TA)
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quote:

Originally posted by Banora Thats fine, I don't want to waste my time with those kind of guys. If he gets it elsewhere, like I said, what do I care? Nothing is official between us.

Fair enough I suppose... I just don't get why you would deny yourself in favour of some (seemingly) arbitrary waiting period. Have you ever considered finding someone for some sort of ongoing casual relationship?

I lost it to a french-canadian who was pretty manipulative about it (i.e. "we have been together for a month, lets just do it")
He was an assistant prof at a school I went to in North quebec

we dated for 3 months and then broke up
we're still really good friends though, just didn't work as bf/gf

my boyfriend HATES him though
they almost got in a fist fight when he came down to visit me from Quebec last summer

quote:

Originally posted by Moral Hazard Have you ever considered finding someone for some sort of ongoing casual relationship?

Eh... nah. I would be weirded out by it. I like to have someone to be with if I am fucking them. I can't just spread my legs, let him go at it, then ignore him until I or he needs to get off again (not to mention I'd wonder how many other girls he was doing that with and would be all paranoid if a condom broke or something).

lol because if you like him, you DO care.

And "those kinds of guys" don't mean that they are bad guys. Actually, they're more honest if anything else. They let you know right away "hey, I don't know if we can work this out yet - but I think you're hot so lets have some fun while we're figuring it out" is better than some guy who is lying to you about your intentions and screwing around behind your back.

Newsflash though: if a guy has been single for a while, even if you're "starting" to date, he probably still has his FB for a little bit.

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee there was a time before we had sex where we were heavily making out on my couch and i wanted it BAD and he was the one saying we should wait. lol he's such a girl sometimes

pfft... that was like a standard operating procedure for me... I'd normally get her off (oral/digital) and then stop her when she went for my cock... usually apologizing for going too fast and suggesting we wait. It pretty much always resulted in some seriously hot fuckin' the next time I saw her... plus having her all hot an bothered imagining my cock increased the odds that she wouldn't laugh at it when she finally saw it.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly "hey, I don't know if we can work this out yet - but I think you're hot so lets have some fun while we're figuring it out" Newsflash though: if a guy has been single for a while, even if you're "starting" to date, he probably still has his FB for a little bit.

Nah, I wouldn't trust him. And: Duh.

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee there was a time before we had sex where we were heavily making out on my couch and i wanted it BAD and he was the one saying we should wait. lol he's such a girl sometimes

lol like two months into us dating he gave me this speech and was like "you can't just keep coming over, f*&^ing me, then leaving. If you come over - you stay the night." At first I thought he was a whiny girl, then he confessed that getting up in the middle of the night to lock the door after I left was a hassle

quote:

Originally posted by Banora Nah, I wouldn't trust him. And: Duh.

lol but you'd trust the guy who you thought was "waiting"?

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly lol but you'd trust the guy who you thought was "waiting"?

I didn't say I wouldn't think he didn't have a FB, I would just hope as we got to know eachother he'd focus more on me once the sex started. If not I'll cut him out.

A guy who is flat out: 'I want your pussy and nothing else until I get to know you' is someone who I would think is just going to hit-it-and-quit-it with several girls at a time.

yea it was probably part of his game (making ME wait) and it worked

i had an FB when we first started dating lol i'm sure he did too. after the 2nd date, i completely dropped the FB though. i was like, "sorry, met someone and he's awesome i don't want to fuck it up"

Well you more or less are saying that when you agree to go out with him. You wouldn't date someone you didn't think was fuckable. So in a sense, you do want to bang him. Some personalities don't change until after a year or two - are you gonna wait that long too?

I never did the FB thing. If I was sleeping with you, it was cause I thought something might be there. Not many people can do the FB with no strings attached for very long, if at all.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly Well you more or less are saying that when you agree to go out with him. You wouldn't date someone you didn't think was fuckable. So in a sense, you do want to bang him. Some personalities don't change until after a year or two - are you gonna wait that long too?

-_- Again, never said I didn't want to bang the guy... I just find if the guy truly is an asshole he can't keep up the act longer than a month, hence the wait.

I don't really get the problem with me not wanting to bang a guy for a month because I feel comfortable waiting that long (not to mention I get bored of guys before that long anyway). Sorry if I don't like to spread my legs and hope it keeps the dude coming back around or because it will make him happy.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly I never did the FB thing. If I was sleeping with you, it was cause I thought something might be there. Not many people can do the FB with no strings attached for very long, if at all.

bitches always catch feelings and then call you crying... i'm pregnant blah blah blah blah ahhh what do we do... ahhh i'm crying ahhhh!


i hate that

Oh no - I'm not judging I was just curious, that's all.

Trying to figure out the significance of a month

quote:

Originally posted by Zild bitches always catch feelings and then call you crying... i'm pregnant blah blah blah blah ahhh what do we do... ahhh i'm crying ahhhh! i hate that

lol that's why I didn't do the FB thing. I'd like to say that I can just continually sleep with someone and not have feelings, but it'd be a lie.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly lol that's why I didn't do the FB thing. I'd like to say that I can just continually sleep with someone and not have feelings, but it'd be a lie.

Ditto, I can't do it, so I refuse to get myself into that situation. If I think its turned into a FB status I quickly cut all contact.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly Oh no - I'm not judging I was just curious, that's all. Trying to figure out the significance of a month

I didn't mean to snap at you... I've had three hours of sleep and my Grandma has been a raging bitch these past few days. Needless to say I'm not in the best of moods.

I guess I feel safe at a month because I seem to attract A LOT of secret asshole guys, I think they see how nice I am and think they can get me in bed, I'll get attached and they have a doormat of a girlfriend. Most of the time they can't hold up the act past a month (a few have, though. Prime example: asshat that caused the Miami fiasco).

quote:

Originally posted by Zild bitches always catch feelings and then call you crying... i'm pregnant blah blah blah blah ahhh what do we do... ahhh i'm crying ahhhh! i hate that

Seriously, what's the deal with chicks and feelings?

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly lol that's why I didn't do the FB thing. I'd like to say that I can just continually sleep with someone and not have feelings, but it'd be a lie.

the thing is you're supposed to kill those feelings. it isn't that you don't have them but you realize hey this stuff doesn't belong here... kill it.

quote:

Originally posted by jennypie

I love that one!

Thing is the child will be executed as well so go with the condoms.

quote:

Originally posted by jennypie

Yea - I can't do that. I really haven't slept with a lot of people so it's all emotion for me lol. I was already crazy about my honey before we slept together for the first time cause I had known him for months.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly Yea - I can't do that. I really haven't slept with a lot of people so it's all emotion for me lol. I was already crazy about my honey before we slept together for the first time cause I had known him for months.

I wouldn't expect you to be able to do it at all. Just saying for most normal people we can use our heads.

I had one FB back in early 2007... best. sex. ever. I just was so...unhappy after he left. I didn't call or anything unless I needed to get off, and there wasn't much conversing before or after sex.

He eventually started to call me to talk, and I panicked. The night I last spoke to him he said something about going out with friends, if I wanted to go and I said something about "maybe we both need to find other people to go out with."

He took the hint, didn't call for two weeks, I didn't answer and he never called again.

* I knew sorta him for about three months until I decided 'fuck it, I'm horny'.

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