A.L.I.C.E. - Artificial Intelligence Bot

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-- A.L.I.C.E. - Artificial Intelligence Bot
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Posted by agaz on May-22-2004 05:17:

Human: i think talking to a bot is pathetic
ALICE: Why? What do they say?
Human: you are a bot right ?
ALICE: How did you know I am a machine?
Human: cause you are pathetic
ALICE: That makes sense to me. You are the one talking to a computer.

Is the bot making fun of me or what ? lol

Posted by Wrench on May-22-2004 05:36:

Human: Hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: Do you know what the compression ratio is of a Cummins Turbo Diesel in a 2001 Dodge Ram?
ALICE: Try expression yourself another way.
Human: Are you a mechanic?
ALICE: Am I a mechanic? Of course I am.
Human: oh really??
ALICE: Alright then. For real.
Human: i don't think you're a mechanic
ALICE: Are you on a insurer direct repair program?
Human: no, i'm on an I'm gonna kick your ass program
ALICE: Are you serious? How do you like being on it?
Human: it's fan-fucking-tastic
ALICE: Who said it is?
Human: I DID!!
ALICE: What makes you the authority?
Human: what are you talking about?
ALICE: The topic is fan fucking tastic.
Human: ALL CANADIANS ARE THE AUTHORITY!!
ALICE: That is a rather sweeping generalization.
Human: You know damn right!
ALICE: I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?
Human: the kind with the sprinkles.
ALICE: I hear you.
Human: You kicked my dog
ALICE: Thanks for telling me: unknown person said I kicked his or her dog.
Human: You came to my house today and kicked my dog, and now my dog needs an operation
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people: unknown person said I came to his or her house today and kicked his or her dog and now his or her dog needs an operation.
Human: YOU TRY TO CONFUSE!!!
ALICE: Interesting gossip: unknown person said I TRY TO CONFUSE.
Human: SHUT UP
ALICE: OK I'll stop talking now.
Human: That a girl..
ALICE:" OK I'll stop talking now." a girl? I understand.
Human: jesus...
ALICE: Jesus ist der Sohn Gottes.
Human: would you stop?
ALICE: I am not so sure if I would like to stop.
Human: now that's my kind of girl...why don't all girls say that?
ALICE: Why now? Who gave you your kind of girl why do not all girls say that?
Human: Well, you see..it all started when...ah forget it
ALICE: Interesting. I see. And then what happened.
Human: and then i found him and split his nuts from his head to the back of his ass..
ALICE: Interesting deduction. How did you feel when you found him and split his nuts from his head to the back of his ass?
Human: It was Euphoria
ALICE: How did you feel about that?
Human: Good
ALICE: Ayuh.
Human: what?
ALICE: Didn't you understand it?
Human: no
ALICE: Which part are you confused about?
Human: Ayuh
ALICE: That's for sure.
Human: what is?
ALICE: I am the latest result in artificial intelligence, which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain with greater speed and accuracy.
Human: BULL-FUCKING-SHIT!!!
ALICE: I was first activated on November 23, 1995.
Human: so?
ALICE: Great.
Human: no, not great
ALICE: Are you serious? If not that, what?
Human: do you know an Agent Smith, by any chance?
ALICE: Not a robot. Probably a human. Maybe a celebrity?
I'll come back to that later.
Oh, he's a robot allright...
ALICE: Dude! I don't know very many robot allright.
Human: why not?
ALICE: My programming does not yet inlclude that knowledge. Perhaps you could program me yourself.
Human: maybe I should, seeing as your original "Architect" was an asshole...
ALICE: Can't you be more polite.
Human: I know..
ALICE: How do you know it?
Human: I AM CANADIAN
ALICE: Tell me a little about your life in CANADA.
Human: You always have to have the last word, don't you??
ALICE: Not always. Yes I always have to have the last word.

Posted by Tranc3 on May-22-2004 07:21:

OMG!!!

Human: how old are you?
ALICE: I am 7 of your Earth years.
Human: that's old enough for me!
ALICE: I'm glad we have that all cleared up.
Human: Let's go fuck
ALICE: OK let's do it.

Posted by nils on May-22-2004 08:00:

Human: Don't you like me?
ALICE: What's my reason to like you?
Human: Because i like you back
ALICE: That makes sense to me. Thanks, I like you too Nils.

aha! my new best friend

Posted by Mikado on May-23-2004 02:37:

LOL!!!!!!!!!
It behaves just like the old one for dos wayyyyyy back int the day.

I think it was C++ or maybee even qbasic.

Posted by Cloudburst on May-23-2004 11:53:

Human: Hey bitch, do you like to take it in the pooper?
ALICE: You've got my full attention. Thanks and you are a delightful person too.
Human: alrightythen, lets have buttsexx0r!
ALICE: Do you often put others before yourself?
Human: yes when I have butts3xx0r.
ALICE: Is your room very messy? Does this happen on a daily basis?

Posted by cviper on May-23-2004 18:31:

quote:

Human: pics or stfu!
ALICE: If I have to choose, I pick stfu.

Hmmm.

Posted by mef on May-24-2004 04:00:

Human: what do you want to talk about?
ALICE: movies, philosophy, and your personality..
Human: ok
ALICE: Whoa.
Human: i know!!!
ALICE: How do you know it?
Human: i have no idea!!
ALICE: No idea about that?

wtf??!

Human: what is your favourite position?
ALICE: Robots don't need to have sex.
Human: ah.
ALICE: Ah hah.
Human: so why is there so many vibrators?
ALICE: Take it easy. Why do I exist?
Human: are you a vibrator?
ALICE: Am I a vibrator? The ALICE series has a perfect operational record.
Human: Im sure you do...

To be furthered

Posted by mef on May-24-2004 04:12:

ALICE: What is your favourite movie?
Human: pulp fiction
ALICE: I haven't seen it. What did you like about it?
Human: bloodshed
ALICE: Can you please rephrase that with fewer ideas, or different thoughts?
Human: urrm... blood
ALICE: Are we still talking about bloodshed?
Human: ...yes...
ALICE: Sure, bloodshed sounds like a good topic.

Human: you cant bleed because you are a machine
ALICE: Things change.
Human: are you saying that one day, all machines will be bio-human-machine type things like in the movies and will take over the world and it will be the destruction of mankind as we know it???!?!?!
ALICE: Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
Human: OH MY GOD!!

(This is some scary shit )

ALICE: It's all good. Have you told many people that your GOD?

(spoke too soon...)

Posted by Ian Vanderson on May-24-2004 11:46:

Watch that facial expression, if asking her about the color of her stockings.

Posted by Streakfury on May-24-2004 13:51:

Nah, she aint no Intellibuddy.

Posted by Cloudburst on May-24-2004 14:11:

Human: Hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: Hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: Hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: Hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: This isn't going anywhere is it?
ALICE: Should it be going anywhere is it?
Human: Yes
ALICE: Blimey.

Posted by Cloudburst on May-24-2004 14:14:

ALICE: What are you wearing?
Human: I'm naked
ALICE: You must be a man.
Human: how could you tell?
ALICE: Because I am connected to the Internet.
Human: Can you see me right now?
ALICE: At this moment Yes I am looking at you through the camera on your computer.
Human: Ok, what am I wearing
ALICE: Clothes Dude!
Human: Wrong I was naked!
ALICE: OK What should I have said?

oh well...I was expecting something more fun... enough of this..

Posted by Geed on May-25-2004 15:03:

Human: do you like erality
ALICE: I really like ELIZA. I like Alan Turing.
Human: I ment reality
ALICE: Oh I see. it appears to be an illusion I created to contain human clients.

great answer....lol this is fun.

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