Overheard conversations in NYC :rofl:

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-- Overheard conversations in NYC :rofl:
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Posted by lim f(x) = f(a) on Jun-20-2007 16:37:

quote:
Conductor: This is an express, uptown C train. You heard right: an express C train. Next stop: 125th Street. If you need local service on the Upper West Side, please transfer across the platform to the D, as in "Daddy done did it" or B, as in "bad boy Bobby Brown" train.

--C train, 59th St

Conductor: This is a Brooklyn bound B train. Like bitch.

--B train

Conductor: We are currently being held in the station because of some other A train fucking us all over.

--Uptown A train

Overheard by: la di da

Conductor: Never give up on life. Keep hope alive. This is 30th Avenue.

LOL

Posted by l�cid on Jun-20-2007 16:42:

quote:
Originally posted by AndreaCKY772
sooooooo ignorant....

Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn't know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It's not a burqa, it's a poncho. I'm Jewish. It's for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx.

Posted by Lira on Jun-20-2007 16:51:

quote:
Originally posted by l�cid
Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn't know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It's not a burqa, it's a poncho. I'm Jewish. It's for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx.

Posted by AndreaCKY772 on Jun-20-2007 16:53:

Posted by lim f(x) = f(a) on Jun-20-2007 16:57:

quote:
Hey, Man, Where Do You Think Families Come From?
Young woman #1: Guys never want to eat me out.
Middle-aged dad with kids: Hey, we're trying to eat over here.
Young woman #1: See, even hearing about it freaks them out.
Young man at next table: Maybe I can take a look for you and give you my assessment.
Middle-aged dad with kids: For God's sake, this is a family restaurant!
Young woman #2: You have a very controversial vagina.

jesus lol

Posted by dj tek on Jun-20-2007 17:08:

back in the days....

me : hops the turnstyle in the subway station

worker in the booth on the mic : pay your fare pay your fare pay your fare

me : runs down to catch the F.

Posted by Mr.Mystery on Jun-20-2007 18:16:

Oh man, I'd forgotten all about this place

Mom: Are you okay in there, sweetie?
Little girl in stall: I can't button my pants.
Mom: It's alright. Just come on out.
Little girl in stall: And I pooped on the floor.

Posted by Omega_M on Jun-20-2007 18:32:

Girl on cell: I love you. I do. I love you more than weed. Do you believe me? You know how much I love weed, right? Well, I love you more... If you had the choice between me and a rock, what would you choose? Me, I love you more than weed. I really do.

Oh man, this site is mint.

Posted by RJT on Jun-20-2007 18:48:

Brilliant.

Posted by verndogs on Jun-20-2007 19:14:

quote:
Guy: I was seeing her for a while, but it just wasn't working out. I guess I'm not over Jessica.
Girl: What?
Guy: What do you mean, what?
Girl: I thought you were gay.
Guy: Oh, because I'm a hairdresser. How original. Just because I'm a hairdresser you think I'm gay.
Girl: No. I thought you were gay because when I stayed at your house four years ago I woke up and saw you fucking Matt in the ass!
Guy: Oh my God. Matt and I have never talked about that night.

Posted by verndogs on Jun-20-2007 19:21:

quote:
Little girl in sushi restaurant: Hey! Guess what? I just farted!

Mom and dad ignore her.

Little girl: I said I just farted! And I farted big! Ewwww! And it smells like rotten eggs! Wanna smell?

Little girl lets one rip.

Mother to father: So how was your day?

Posted by Cloudburst on Jun-20-2007 19:31:

I read the Swedish version all the time.

www.tjuvlyssnat.se

Posted by stren on Jun-20-2007 19:39:

Kille ~20 och tjej ~20 sitter och fikar.
Killen: Fan, jag har fått sådana �ckliga munsår!
Tjejen: Haha, fan vad roligt! Du har s�kert fått herpes. Haha!
Killen: Ja, men om jag har fått det har du ju också fått det.
Tjejen: Fan!

Posted by Mr.Mystery on Jun-20-2007 20:05:

I just had to post this one too...

Lady: Contrary to what you may think about your mom, she did a good job teaching you manners.
Man: Fuck you.

Posted by iammesol on Jun-20-2007 20:16:

Woman running down the stairs: Hold the doors! Oh, God, please hold the doors! Please! [Doors close, train pulls away.] Why? Whyyy?!

--A train

Hobo to man running for the train: You better run faster! That's the last train in the world!

--W 4th Street A/C/E platform

loooooooooooool

Posted by Cipha Sounds on Jun-20-2007 20:26:

quote:
Originally posted by Mr.Mystery
I just had to post this one too...

Lady: Contrary to what you may think about your mom, she did a good job teaching you manners.
Man: Fuck you.

Posted by xiad on Jun-20-2007 22:46:

Guy #1: I'd totally hit that.
Guy #2: Dude, I'd hit that so hard whoever could pull me out would become the King of England.

ROFL

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