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-- Worst Situation to have to Take a Big Dump
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| Originally posted by bas Why didn't you just call Ian? |
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| Originally posted by nchs09 hahaha wtf kinda thread is this. when i gotta go i just go. why wait untill you cant hold it in anymore. |
I have a good one 
I was about 10 or 11 years old at the time and I was waiting for the school bus when suddenly the urge to shit hit me REALLY hard. I was about to head back home but I saw the bus coming about 2 blocks away. This posted a bit of a dilemma since that day there was a school trip to this fucking awesome place and I didn't want to miss it...but then again I had to shit real bad! I went up the bus and about 10 minutes in I just couldn't hold it in anymore and I effectively shit myself. I just remember feeling something warm building up on my butt-cheeks and then an unbelievable stench of shit filling up.
I was scared shitless (no pun intended), if anyone found out what just happened I would never hear the end of it. I could already hear the snappy nicknames coming. So I just sat there motionless, pretending to be asleep and when the time to get off the bus at school came I just stayed last so noone would notice it was me.
My plan was to go to my classroom (which had a bathroom inside), but when I got there everyone was already lining up to board the bus which was taking us on our field-trip. I figured I was not going to have another bus ride with a fucking turd in my pants so I just said: "fuck it!" and ran into the bathroom. Once inside I realized, "what the fuck I'm I to do now?". So I decided to take off my underwear and just drop it in the trashcan and wipe my ass as clean as I could. I finished wiping and started running my ass off towards the bus. I got there just on time, as everyone was still boarding the bus.
To my surprise, the fucking stench was still there and my ass itched like crazy! I managed to hide the fact that it was me for the rest of the trip and as we returned to the classroom to get our things the janitor was there complaining about the shit covered surprise on the bathroom trashcan. I remember there was a big fuss over this as they tried to find out who did it and they actually pinned it on some kid in my class who was nothing but trouble. Those were good times, seeing the bastard cry like a baby swearing it wasn't him!
Mission success! 
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| Originally posted by idoru |
biggest laugh of my whole day reading that last post omg this could turn out to be an epic thread!!!
I once was in the traffic situation mentioned above but instead of traffic i was on a fucking bridge. You know one of those bridges that says long bridge ahead check gas, well i should have checked my ass! I had to shit so bad as I was going across the bridge and to make it even better the first off ramp was 54th street and I was on on 118th. I could not phisicaly hold it anymore (hands were sweaty, I was clamy and cold, and I wasnt even sitting on the seat!) I was proped up above the seat cause if I was fully sitting down I would have shit myself. I got off the bridge and pulled over the emergency lane and went behind a couple of bushes. I had some Paper towels in my car that i had recently bought and I used that to wipe my ass.
PS It is the worst feeling in the world when you have to shit and there is no toilet nearby!!!
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| Originally posted by Coastie PS It is the worst feeling in the world when you have to shit and there is no toilet nearby!!! |
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| Originally posted by idoru |
I think the worst time to have to take a shit(the explosive kind) would be right at the beginning of a final. What do you do?
Pretty much anytime I am with my boyfriend...
He thinks me pooping is incredibly entertaining, and finds it even more entertaining to call me on it, and then pester me to no end about how I pooped. AND, if he thinks I am pooping, he will come to the door, and ask in this feigning concerned way if I am ok, and if I need help.
That bastard.
LOL!
Anyway... I don't really have any bad poo stories I can remember right now.
What a stupid thread. Haha!
I have a couple gems..
High school cross country meet. It was my junior year and about 1 mile in (3miles total) I get that sudden urge. The urge that has been mentioned several times above. The I'm about to shit myself any second feeling. A teammate was at my same pace and running next to me and I was bitching and moaning to him the whole race saying I had to shit. Well no more than 200-300yds from the finish I couldnt hold it any longer. I dart off the course and into a small passage of woods and basically shit as I'm pulling down my shorts. Unfortunately I don't make it all the way so I partially shat my shorts and even got some on my legs. I can see runners passing me and looking at me as I'm in the woods shitting. My gold jersey didnt help hide me in the foliage. I try as best I could to clean myself up with leaves and my gold jersey to resume the race. So I do and of course the finish line is lined with family members and other teammates of my team and other schools. Luckly this was the one meet all year that the females didn't go with us. One of my buddies dad saw my fucking mess and told me to keep on running straight to the showers. The next year I placed first, I got my revenge.
The second story is walking home from my GF's dorm to my dorm at Uni of Florida. Long story short, I got that same gonna shit now urge and started to run, but didn't make it. It came out while I was running and shit on the sidewalk and across a crosswalk. Thank god it was after midnight and nobody was around.
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| Originally posted by Theresa He thinks me pooping is incredibly entertaining, and finds it even more entertaining to call me on it, and then pester me to no end about how I pooped. AND, if he thinks I am pooping, he will come to the door, and ask in this feigning concerned way if I am ok, and if I need help. |
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| Originally posted by Zewad I have a couple gems.. High school cross country meet. It was my junior year and about 1 mile in (3miles total) I get that sudden urge. The urge that has been mentioned several times above. The I'm about to shit myself any second feeling. A teammate was at my same pace and running next to me and I was bitching and moaning to him the whole race saying I had to shit. Well no more than 200-300yds from the finish I couldnt hold it any longer. I dart off the course and into a small passage of woods and basically shit as I'm pulling down my shorts. Unfortunately I don't make it all the way so I partially shat my shorts and even got some on my legs. I can see runners passing me and looking at me as I'm in the woods shitting. My gold jersey didnt help hide me in the foliage. I try as best I could to clean myself up with leaves and my gold jersey to resume the race. So I do and of course the finish line is lined with family members and other teammates of my team and other schools. Luckly this was the one meet all year that the females didn't go with us. One of my buddies dad saw my fucking mess and told me to keep on running straight to the showers. The next year I placed first, I got my revenge. The second story is walking home from my GF's dorm to my dorm at Uni of Florida. Long story short, I got that same gonna shit now urge and started to run, but didn't make it. It came out while I was running and shit on the sidewalk and across a crosswalk. Thank god it was after midnight and nobody was around. |
There shouldn't ever be a time where taking a giant dump is considered the "worst" of anything.
i'm pooping right now.
In the dining room.
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| Originally posted by woscar99 I have a good one |
right before you go to jail, so someone i know tells me from experience.
this guy i know got locked up on a friday right before a holiday weekend, so he couldn't see the judge until wednesday. to his misfortune he was jailed in a big room with a couple of toilet alongside one wall. the toilets didn't have any dividers, nor doors, or anything. (now this is a person that pisses in the stalls so no one will see his dick.)
so he held his shit in for several days. the first day was difficult, but he was tough. the second day was easier, as he had gotten used to the pain. by the fourth and fifth day though, he was reciting the lord's prayer.
My cousin told me a story a few years back about one of his mountain climbing trips to Nepal.
They'd been out one night for some local food and a few days later were getting ready to head off on their expedition. One guy in their group hadn't crapped since they'd been out for tea, massively constipated. Apparently in a bit of pain and obviously couldn't go on the climb if he wasn't regular cos its a bit of a hazard to him and the climb group. They took him to the hospital to get it dislodged, the story goes the doctor basically inserted a funnel into his arse to break through the blockage, there was enough backpressure that when the pressure was released it came spurting out and sprayed the doctor and nurse and the surrounding area.
Nasty.
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| Originally posted by Trance Nutter Nasty. |
Worst situation for me was at the top of Haleakala in Maui, Hawaii. The bathrooms weren't too bad, but I was in the middle of business and a HUGE ASS FUCKING SPIDER runs right by my foot and it sat by me for so damn long. On top of that I realized that the fkn toilet paper dispensers were empty 
I'm pretty sure this girl trumps all your stories (NSFW):
Damn, I feel bad for this girl.
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| Originally posted by cmay119 I'm pretty sure this girl trumps all your stories (NSFW): |
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