the almighty ****ed up/twisted/dark jokes thread

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-- the almighty ****ed up/twisted/dark jokes thread
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Posted by exstasie on Feb-05-2008 02:19:

quote:
Originally posted by UmmiE
LOL thats why I did 25 on brown people which now cancels = 0

It is a little to far..but its nothing we haven't heard before..

kk, here's a conversation that actually took place in High school haha

Jewish Guy: Oh my God, I'm so excited for Jewish Camp this summer!
Brown Guy: So..um...what do you guys do there anyway...Concentrate?

hahaha..they were friends and the brown guy was trying to be funny, so its all good.

Posted by Yohan on Feb-05-2008 02:20:

quote:
Originally posted by cenik
Too far

*knock knock*

Who's there?

Gestapo

Gestapo who?

Just kidding. We don't knock

Posted by Ania_xox on Feb-05-2008 02:41:

quote:
Originally posted by Zentac_75

Q: Why do women take longer than men to reach orgasm?

A: Who cares?

LOL !!!!! hahahahahaha

Posted by Xavier Moriarty on Feb-05-2008 02:45:

quote:
Originally posted by cenik
Too far

hey, only rule in this thread is that theres no such thing as too far. the title tells it all, fucked up or twisted or dark.

that being said :

- mom can i go out and play with my sister
- no
- but mom please
- NO
- but mom pleaspleaspleaseplease......
- well ok, but when you're done, bury her in the same place
==============================================================
phone rings :

- hey mike its john, wanna go out for a beer
- nah man, not tonight, im sick
- whats up?? flu??
- no. im fucking my sister
==============================================================

Q. how do you make 4 years old girl cry twice in less than 5 minutes?
A. after you rape her wipe your bloody cock on her favourite teddy bear

Posted by Xavier Moriarty on Feb-05-2008 02:51:

A gay couple and a lesbian couple both live on the top floor of the same building. The building catches on fire. Who gets out first?

The fags, they already had their shit packed.

LOL

Posted by Rodrico on Feb-05-2008 03:52:

Two gay guys are taking their morning exercise jog together when they both come across a mausoleum, the one gay guy looks at the other and says "Hey, wanna suck back a cold one?"

Posted by Zentac_75 on Feb-05-2008 04:51:

quote:
Originally posted by Rodrico
Two gay guys are taking their morning exercise jog together when they both come across a mausoleum, the one gay guy looks at the other and says "Hey, wanna suck back a cold one?"

I was falling asleep so it took a minute but BAHAHAHAHAHAH.......sigh BAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

Im off to bed now... bahahahah

Posted by Owen M on Feb-05-2008 04:57:

quote:
Originally posted by Zentac_75
I don't get it either...or maybe my family back home isn't attractive enough to validate the incest jokes lol

lo...maybe thats just the reason why :P no where else to get that sweet sweet lovin'

Where's the dead babies jokes? no dead baby jokes?

Posted by Rook on Feb-05-2008 05:03:

Q: What do you do when the dishwasher stops working?.

A: Slap her.

Posted by thesauce23 on Feb-05-2008 13:18:

why are blacks good at basketball?

they are naturally skilled at running, shooting and stealing

p.s. seen?

Posted by ChemEnhanced on Feb-05-2008 13:46:

Whats yellow, green, and red and hangs in my back yard.

He's my N****R and I'll paint him what ever colours I want.

Posted by Whip_lash on Feb-05-2008 14:28:

How do you find the fastest mexican?

- roll a quarter down the hill

How do you find the richest mexican?

- the one who found the quarter

How do stop a black kid from jumping on your bed?

- put some velcro on the seiling

How do you kill 50 flies at once?

- Hit a somalian in the face with a shovel

Why did a black person drive a pontiac?

- Poor old n***er thought its a cadillac (get it???ha!)

How do you know that a packistani robbed ur house?

- the curtins are gone

Posted by CAKE on Feb-05-2008 14:29:

this one is my fav

Q: What's the difference between a washing machine and a one night stand?

A: A washing machine doesn't follow you around for a week after you drop a load in it.

Posted by Whip_lash on Feb-05-2008 14:32:

Why are horses so gay?

- cuz they like to eat haaaayyyyyy

** Next ones a bit harsh**

How do make an 8 year old cry

- rub ur bloody dick on her teddy bear

Posted by exstasie on Feb-05-2008 15:13:

Q: What do you call the Playboy Channel in Ethiopia?
A: The Food Network.

Q: How do you count the population of Ethiopia?
A: Roll a Doughnut down the Street.

Q: Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
R: Nope
A: Neither have they.

Posted by I_Am_Vince on Feb-05-2008 16:06:

Q: What's the difference between a pair of jeans and an Ethiopian kid?

A: A pair of jeans only has one fly on it!

Posted by Xavier Moriarty on Feb-05-2008 17:39:

q. whats the difference between black dude and extra large pizza with 3 toppings??
a. extra large pizza can feed a family of four

Posted by Ania_xox on Feb-05-2008 17:41:

Q. What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson?

A. Acne doesn't usually come on a kid's face until it's 13.

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