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Posted by jon jon on Feb-13-2009 02:47:

quote:
Today, I listened to my room mate having sex from 3 A.M. until 6 A.M. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML

najdfadsfdfBABHAHAHA gold!

Posted by Dirty on Feb-14-2009 02:58:

Today, my girlfriend left a message on my phone. It was just the sounds of her having sex with somebody. FML

Today, my on-and-off boyfriend of 8 years asked me to cheer him up. I told him that I'm in love with him. He said "Oh, I just wanted a blowjob." FML

Posted by geroin on Feb-14-2009 03:04:

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

lmao

Posted by Dirty on Feb-14-2009 03:07:

Today, I had to get my license renewal picture taken and after the first go the woman said "It looks like your eyes are closed." I'm Asian. FML

Posted by funkapotamus on Feb-15-2009 08:51:

"Today, I fell asleep in my driver's ed class, and I woke up in a middle of a dream laughing. Everyone stared at me. I found out that the teacher had just finished talking about his vegetative niece who didn't wear a seat belt. FML"

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