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there shouldnt every be cheating going on...... if you cheat then u dont need to be in a relationship...... and if you have the balls to cheat on someone ...u should have the balls to call it off before u do so....no point in being in a relationship if u want to go with somene else ......... i say if you want to get with someone else call the relationship off before u do .......

i just have to say.. j_spot and smackdown u guys are just dogs and not every guy is like u.. reading your post made me sick. im sure its really reasuring for stereoprincess to be reading that BULLSHIT!!! and j_spot u said that when u cheated u felt bad, thats the most bullshit ive heard out your mouth. im sorry but in my mind there is no way that could be true. you guys are too insecure so you need to play games. get a life.. u could very well be hurting people by acting the way u do.. im sorry but hurting people is just not all that funny to me. u guys get no respect in my book. but seeing as what u are, dogs, im sure that does not matter to u.

j_spot this is a very lame excuse:
Screw the its genetics..I cant help myself, I need to procreate argument. Guys my age just cant stay in a serious relationship

dont go speaking like every other guy is just like u.. believe me i know that a lot of guys are dogs just like u, but not all of them are. a lot of them are not!! and if guys your age cant stay in a serious relationship then why do they feel the need to PRETEND they can. your full of shit.. quit making excuses.

u do not have to be in a serious relation at your age.. im 21 and have not been in a serious relationship cause u know what????? i dont want to be!!! so i dont. and i dont pretend i can.

I'm young, having fun right now. I don't want to be tied down by women. A lot have already tried to do that to me and it pisses me off. I could see if I was married and cheating then you soulc call me a dog, but at this age in these days and times to find the right person you have to go through a lot. I know people dont agree with what I do but I don't like breaking up with people, it's another affliction I have. Anyways hopefully I don't get shot by one of my psycho ex's.

UD RATHER CHEAT ON SOMEONE THEN BREAK IT OFF..... OMG THATS QUITE POSSIBLY ONE OF THE DUMBEST REASONS IN THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!! im just so glad i dont have friends or boyfriends like u.

Re: cheating....?????????

quote:

Originally posted by StereoPrincess Has anyone of you cheated or have been cheated on?? What happened with the relationship?? Just going through some hard stuff and just wanna know. Is it possible for love to over come such hurt??

i got cheated on by my first love...took him back...i wouldn't recommend it. move on and become a cold hearted bitch and just play all the men out there for the fools that they are.


hahahaha.

no but seriously, when i got cheated on in high school, it royally fucked me up...it was terrible. if your man cheated on you and you're feeling bitter and don't trust him, then move on babe. it'll hurt at first but i promise it won't hurt forever...people move on. you'll look back in a year or two and think, "why did i waste my friggin TIME on him!" when u can laugh about it and have no hard feelings, then that's when u know you're truly over it. at least that's how it is for me...


as for me cheating...i'm not gonna front and say that i would never. i don't really know. but i can honestly tell u that i would never cheat on the wonderful man i have now. i believe it's all about who you're with, so it depends.

yup definitely i feel fucked up. i have no idea where to go from here. i want to stay together but he feels so guilty about it that he doesn't wanna talk to me. maybe i'm just blind and he is still with that chick as we speak. i just don't want to believe that a person that i have been together with for 3 and a half years would choose some floozie over me especially when we have been though so much together. so i'm not living with him and i'm trying to forget about it for a couple weeks. i cry all the time, why?? shit i don't know. hate being rejected i guess.

Leave his ass. Trust me once a cheater always a cheater. Take it from me.

damn..i took a beat down there, but I deserve it. I know what Ive done is wrong. There is a good reason that I am single now, and its my choice mostly. NONE and I say none(except one who is gay) of my friends who date alot have stayed faithfull. Everysingle one of us has cheated.
I dont think its ok..there is a reason I puke afterwards, I feel guilty as hell, and for a good reason. And of all those times I cheated, the only time I stuck with the person was when the cheating was a peck on the lips, and then I stopped it cuz I cared about the girl I was with. Most of the time I would cheat, and then break up with the girl. Am I proud of what Ive done? HELL NO. Am I ashamed of it..certain cases yes. Others no. I do feel bad..like wrenching pit of my stomach Ive gone to the clinic to find out its anxiety bad.

U only know what Ive told you layla. The rest of the details (ie in one case, telling the girl, I need more room, U r suffocating me and having her giggle and say Deal with it, while kissing me on the forehead..she may as well have been dumped there..but im not about to dump a girl in the main hall @ school, so that night, I cheated on her. Less than 12 hours later I was single and not single again. or one night while @ a party when My girl starts going @ it with some other guy in front of me...who is also taken. His girl and I end up together..next day it was all normal(damn..im a swinger)

Layla, what u said hurts. damn..the last time I cheated on a girl was...in grade 12. Now im third year college. Im not about to do it again. Ive messed some people up, and been messed with myself, and I dont really enjoy either. Especially knowing that somebodies views on life changed because I cheated on her. Little side note, I have yet to have sex while cheating..just kissing and fondling. I wouldnt do that, im not a whore who fucks anything on 2 legs.

As for my 'excuse' u r right. I know several guys who are in it for the long run. My best friend is quasi engaged and already planning his wedding(he is 19) Others are just in long term relationships, but they arent serious about it. They werent serious relationships(except the one who I didnt know I cheated on till I was told so)..I dunno what to say. Im not defending mine or any other guys actions. Its a bad thing to do.

if ya still think im a dog..well then whatever.

Id almost be tempeted to leave him. For a while. If you still ache for him a month down the road, and hes feeling the same, get back together. If a month from now, youve been more interested in somebody else, forget it.

i think i'm going to do that. let him sort out his feelings and in the mean time i would like to wait but i can't wait forever. there are a lot of guys that i missed out on and there is only one of stereoprincess.

It's hard

When my ex and I broke up.( she dumped me after 5 years). I questioned everything about myself, as though somthing was wrong with me. The way I looked or the way I treated her etc... I over analyzed everything which just put me into a deep depression. I felt like a freak for a while. I now know it was just our time. I really loved her and thats why it hurt so much she wasn't just some bimbo from the club. She was more. Since we broke up a year ago I've gone on a few dates but mostly just partied.

Reading what you just wrote made me think back to how rejected I felt. It's hard when someone you've shared so much with crosses a line where you may feel there's no turning back from. In the end you have to look out for yourself and whats best for you.

In the end it's going to be his loss.
It always is...............

I would say dont wait. Some guy who seems decent hits on you, give it a shot, why not? worse that can happen is that u realise u like guy#1 alot more than u thought. Best case, you realise that your ex isnt all he was cracked up to be...

i agree about a lot of stuff layla said but i got nothin against u guys since i hardly know you all...but if u know you're gonna cheat, then don't allow yourself to be tied down. u guys get all wrapped up in it and don't wanna break it off and before you know it, you're in too deep and you are cheating all the time. just be a man and break it off...no woman can FORCE u to be with her..that's bs. just remember that the girls you are playing have feelings like you. i have nothin against asshole guys though...most of my guy friends are...that's why they're just my FRIENDS. hahaha also, there are A LOT of shiesty girls out there scheming on guys for money and shit these days or they're mackin to their guy's buddies. i think the percentage of girls like that is increasing gradually throughout the years. especially here in miami! damn whores. lol


btw stereoprincess...i'm telling u, DON'T take him back...i don't give a shit how sorry he is or feels. if he isn't speaking to you cuz he feels guilty then fine...let him be. it might very well be a plot to get u to take him back. trust me, i've done that trick! lol don't go running back and don't take his calls or any of that shit. i'd get together with some of your girlfriends if you have any (i don't mean that in a rude way, but when ur in a relationship for 3 and something yrs..you're bf is your only friend, which isn't cool in my book) and just go party away!! keep yourself busy...even if u just go walking with some headphones and some good tunes...NOT any of your songs with him...hehe that won't work. lol

oh yea, u wanna see a picture of my ass? here...


(___|___)

/me hopes stereoprincess is laughin.

Dammit..I was hopin to see a pic of Slylees ass...what a diassapointment.

I DO BREAK UP WITH THEM AFTER I CHEAT! If Im gonna do that to them then they deserve better.

I agree with Slylee. I dated this girl from Oregon and when I was planning to move to Chicago she cheated on me while I was visiting Chicago. I found out when I got back and it was hard for about a month and I thought that I loved her. So I got back with her and we moved to Chicago to solidify our relationship. Well that was the biggest mistake of my life(well, second biggest), she ended up seeing another d00d behind my back while living with me!!!

It's true once a cheater always a cheater. Move on with your life, and if you feel that it's still there after a while, then talk to him again. There's definitely more people for you to meet out here in the world.

Until then, you always have our fragmented advice and our ever listening ears. Good Luck Girl!

Payce

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee oh yea, u wanna see a picture of my ass? here... (___|___) /me hopes stereoprincess is laughin.

yes, you always make me laugh.

all you guys are really cool. but j_spot you should break up BEFORE you cheat. it really sucks.

I know I should. And well..I wont say I will next time, cuz hopefully there wont be a next time. But I really should

Eeek, touchy subject we're discussing here. I personally think that to give advice on this is tough since everyone handles these things differently. I've had three serious girlfriends since highschool (not to demean anyone's highschool relationship, but for me, they didn't mean much looking back at them). One I dated for a year and a half, another I dated just shy of a year, and the last I dated for about 5 1/2 out of 6 1/2 years. I cheated on them all, the first two once a piece, and the last one a few times with the same girl. Two out of the three, the first and third, also cheated on me, both with multiple people. I can't really use the first two as examples, since neither of them to this day know I cheated on them (and I didn't really find out until after our relationship that the first cheated on me), but with my last girlfriend both of us came clean during our relationship. I told her about my episode after our first break up (it was said out of spite, ah well), and she always told me days after it happened since she had a hard time keeping things from me. I realized during this relationship that I, for one, can handle some cheating. I guess I just denote the difference between something beautiful that happens between two people who care about each other, and something physical that can happen between two people mutually attracted to one another. I do think that cheating is wrong, and should be avoided at all costs, but I also understand that things happen. Every time I cheated it wasn't because I cared about the person I was dating less, or that I didn't want to be with them. It was just something stupid that I did physically with another person. When I got cheated on, I looked at it in the same light, and realized that it just didn't bother me that much. I agree that it would be different if she was spending alot of time with this person, then it would be some sort of a mental connection too, or if she was cheating on me like every couple of months. But to just have my partner have a one night fling with someone? I can handle that. Is it for everyone? No, definately not. I guess what you need to ask yourself is if you are saddened more by the thought of what he and you did, or by the thought of not having him in your life anymore. If it's the latter, then by all means, try and give it a chance. If at worst, it won't work out, but you might be missing out on a beautiful relationship all because of stupidity on both your parts. And hey, we're all human (well, maybe not a couple of 'people' on here), which means we're all stupid every now and then.

i got cheated on once... it wasn't cool...

There's really no good excuse for cheating. If they did it once, it's liable to happen again. Plus, it's hard to earn somebody's trust back. I know some of you say may think that kissing isn't cheating, but technically anything physical is. Cheating is cheating no matter what the circumstance. No matter how emotionally attached you are to this person, your best bet is to move on. Some relationships do work out, but in the end you will be a much happier person if you find someone that treats you well and doesn't deceive you. You do not deserve to be walked upon. I know it may be hard, but you really shouldn't dwell on past relationships. Not every guy/girl is going to be like that. It know it's hard to cope with. I've been there, done that. A relationship without trust is nothing. Find someone who really cares and don't give up until you do.

Steph

I know** typing mistake above.

Anyway, here is my story as follows.

Feelings are undeniable. In December, I got myself into a relationship that I really shouldn't have. He's been on probation, house arrest, been in rehab, you name it. I didn't know at the time that I was making a bad choice because I didn't want to believe it. He cheated on his ex-girlfriend six times before. Cheaters are sweet talkers. They try to tell you that they would never do that because they've grown up. Well, do I have news for you. He ended up getting a DUI and had to go back to rehab in March. I agreed to stay with him because I liked him that much and I did think that he was being faithful towards me. I soon learned thereafter that he had sex with this acnescarred sickass girl. It kind of puts your self esteem when they stoop that low but I didn't deserve to be treated like that in the first place. I should've known what I was getting myself into. When I look back I wish I could have but there's nothing I can do about it now except for move on and consider it a learning experience.

would kicking the shit out of the chick help me get over my sadness??? and yeah i can take her no problem. there is no chance that she could hurt me in anyway. fucken bitch.

quote:

Originally posted by Aviston I realized during this relationship that I, for one, can handle some cheating. I guess I just denote the difference between something beautiful that happens between two people who care about each other, and something physical that can happen between two people mutually attracted to one another. I do think that cheating is wrong, and should be avoided at all costs, but I also understand that things happen. Every time I cheated it wasn't because I cared about the person I was dating less, or that I didn't want to be with them. It was just something stupid that I did physically with another person. When I got cheated on, I looked at it in the same light, and realized that it just didn't bother me that much. I agree that it would be different if she was spending alot of time with this person, then it would be some sort of a mental connection too, or if she was cheating on me like every couple of months. But to just have my partner have a one night fling with someone? I can handle that. Is it for everyone? No, definately not. I guess what you need to ask yourself is if you are saddened more by the thought of what he and you did, or by the thought of not having him in your life anymore. If it's the latter, then by all means, try and give it a chance.

i definitely take the same view on cheating because shit happens. its how you handle it after. last night i cried a bit think of him and the fucking slut together. just thinking if he said the smae things to her as to me and if they did other things like hug all night and shit like that. but i know that things like that kill me so i have stopped. i definitely can handle cheating because originally i was the one that cheated (i only kissed another guy not slept with them) and i know how it feels. but that just made me realize that i loved my guy more. so whatever he realized after his cheating, i don't know yet because he is finding it hard to talk about it. but you have to know that we are eight hours apart and its not something that you can discuss over the phone.

Waste of time...............

Want to get back at him................ Ignore him. If what you had meant so little to him that he cheated then why bother. By reacting like that you give him power by letting him know how much it hurt you. Cut him out of your life. Bang. He dosen't exisit. I know that your hurt by the asshole but as a guy let me tell ya as long as we know that we bug the shit out of ya we feel superior. ie Look at the crazy bitch, she still so hung up on me blah blah blah...........It's when you ignore us that it drives us nuts. You learned somthing from this relationship that you can take with ya for others good and bad. So screw him you sound like a cool girl and I'm sure over time you'll meet someone who will treat ya like gold. Also chicks that scrap are so unattractive........


Cheers

P.S Maybe you should get away from Ottawa for the weekend and come to toronto to party with your friends.....Just to do somthing away from home..............

quote:

Originally posted by StereoPrincess would kicking the shit out of the chick help me get over my sadness??? and yeah i can take her no problem. there is no chance that she could hurt me in anyway. fucken bitch.

haha, right on dude...but only if she knew you were his gf. don't forget to kick the shit outta him too. oh and baby e aren't u like 15??? what are you doin with guys like that? stay away from them:P oh and i have something else to add to this discussion: since we are all net junkies and are on the topic of cheating, how do you guys feel about online shit? like if your guy or girl was emailing/chatting back and forth with someone else all the time. or if u found emails with pictures and intimate conversations? just curious. my opinion is that it is the same. if you are chatting with someone constantly and talking about inappropriate things, it's cheating (well not technically, but bad enough) in my book. a lot of people might disagree, but i think it would be different if they found out that their guy/girl was constantly chatting with this other guy/girl and exchanging pics and talking about sex and stuff like that. also there are a lot of men out there (and women too!) that have these online affairs that last a long time and they go and meet the person they've been chatting with and emailing for months or even years...that is worst case scenerio. it is very common these days and sad.

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