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-- what are some Confindence Boosters?
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I just went on a run in 90 degree weather. I need to relax

quote:

Originally posted by Floorfiller i'm sorry but i need clarification from the thread starter... do you lack confidence in a certain area or just in general?

Certain areas

No, the bullshit is coming from you Slylee � it�s simply not that easy. If it was there'd be no such thing as depression.

It�s arrogant to say that you�re in complete control of your thoughts and mind. You might be able to direct and focus ones cognitive abilities on a set activity, but that�s not 100% control.

For example, just think of all the topics, scraps of information and memories pass through your mind when you�ve just got into bed before you fall asleep. Or, when something jogs your memory - the train of thoughts that ensue are not under your control, they just flow. The subconscious mind plays a lot more in the though process then most people are willing to admit, because, and I can empathise with that fear, it�s frightening to accept that there are forces which govern our behaviour and thoughts which are beyond our control.

Real depression is not something which is easily overcome, it requires time hard work and a lot of soul searching, not a quick happy thoughts fix. When you�re depressed, you just can�t sit around thinking happy thoughts, it doesn�t work like that. You try and see the good side of things, but no matter what you get drawn back to the bad side like a black hole. Depression and self confidence problems have much more to do with deep rooted issues than a simple �let�s think happy thoughts� can fix.

quote:

Originally posted by TweeK Certain areas

well...

if it happens to be something like confidence in dating (which seems to be pretty prevalent in CORe) then i would say have a drink or two to take away the jitters or something.

if its something else...you might get a different response...it really depends on what you have trouble with.

Lately whith the ladies i been about to lose my shyness and just go up to them and hit on them....and if the reject me(which most of the time they do)i just laugh it off

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Originally posted by TweeK Lately whith the ladies i been about to lose my shyness and just go up to them and hit on them....and if the reject me(which most of the time they do)i just laugh it off

that's a good tactic. recently when i've gone out in the last couple of weeks...i've pretty much had girls offer themselves up to me twice (well i know that one of the girls liked me before so its easy to have confidence when you know they like you). i think a good way to go about things is be yourself, don't be shy (i'm a very shy person, but not around friends) and let them come to you. if you can carry yourself and be charismatic, then you won't have trouble approaching people or getting them to look your way.

quote:

Originally posted by Floorfiller (well i know that one of the girls liked me before so its easy to have confidence when you know they like you).

SO true

Wow...this stuff made me pass out and im still kind of floating. I lke things that give me more energy though. I dont think ll be using this again any time soon.

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Originally posted by Spin Doctor [ Real depression is not something which is easily overcome

As someone who has suffered from both Chemical and situational depression I find that pretty offensive. Telling someone that their depression isnt the real kind can get you your ass kicked pretty hard and fast.

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Originally posted by Spin Doctor No, the bullshit is coming from you Slylee � it�s simply not that easy. If it was there'd be no such thing as depression. It�s arrogant to say that you�re in complete control of your thoughts and mind. You might be able to direct and focus ones cognitive abilities on a set activity, but that�s not 100% control. For example, just think of all the topics, scraps of information and memories pass through your mind when you�ve just got into bed before you fall asleep. Or, when something jogs your memory - the train of thoughts that ensue are not under your control, they just flow. The subconscious mind plays a lot more in the though process then most people are willing to admit, because, and I can empathise with that fear, it�s frightening to accept that there are forces which govern our behaviour and thoughts which are beyond our control. Real depression is not something which is easily overcome, it requires time hard work and a lot of soul searching, not a quick happy thoughts fix. When you�re depressed, you just can�t sit around thinking happy thoughts, it doesn�t work like that. You try and see the good side of things, but no matter what you get drawn back to the bad side like a black hole. Depression and self confidence problems have much more to do with deep rooted issues than a simple �let�s think happy thoughts� can fix.

why dont u read my second post before you run your mouth to me. i clearly said that depression due to chemical imbalances is a different story.

i understand that your thoughts flow and u are not in control of that sometimes, but you are always in control of what you take out of everything or how you react to thoughts.

and don't think for one second that i have never suffered from depression or that i haven't had turmoil in my life, and that's why it's easy for me to say that. i am speaking out of pure experience. i know i'm very strong willed and stubborn, so i just refused for that crap to take over my life and snapped out of it. i understand not everyone can do that.

i bet learning how to spell 'confidence' would be a good start. reminding yourself that you aren't Vivid Boy is probably a safe second.

I say good hair is a confidence booster...

quote:

Originally posted by BadBadNeil I say good hair is a confidence booster...

oakey you beautiful man you

Orbax, I think you�ve misinterpreted my use there. By saying real depression, I�m trying to differentiate between some one who feels a bit down because, say for example, their football team has lost (ie. something which could be remedied by a bit of positive mental attitude, and which people call depression) and the type of depression you really need to get help to sort out. And, having had close family members suffer from clinical depression, and my self before, I�ve got plenty of background to safely, I feel, use the term �real� in the context that I have. In retrospect, I guess I could have used a better word than real, but I�ll stand by my use of it.

Slylee, firstly, where have I broached the topic of chemical imbalances? Secondly, I still disagree with the level of control you attribute. How you react to your though and what you get out of situations are clouded by emotion. Wmotion being one which we certainly don�t have a direct command over; if something pisses us off, it pisses us off. At the instant of anger, we just can�t click a switch and turn it off. Self confidence issues & depression, in my view are like that too. The �click a switch and turn it off� view was the position which I inferred from your post hence my reply to it.

Lol, we are all just preprogrammed robots!...or maybe it�s just me

martial arts really helped my confidence....after all, knowing I can kick 99% of people's ass in a club or bar when I walk into it is a really good feeling & ego trip.

everyone's different. i am able to turn my switch on and off most of the time cuz i am really in tune with my feelings and my mind. i always analyze my own reactions to things and my thoughts about something that happened...that's just me though, always thinking. i talk to myself too, it's very theraputic.

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Originally posted by PHALPAX martial arts really helped my confidence....after all, knowing I can kick 99% of people's ass in a club or bar when I walk into it is a really good feeling & ego trip.

i agree totally. my dad did karate his whole life and was a 3rd degree black belt (i think that's the highest??) and he says it taught him a lot of confidence and self discipline. i think it's a great thing for young boys to get involved in. girls too...

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee i agree totally. my dad did karate his whole life and was a 3rd degree black belt (i think that's the highest??) and he says it taught him a lot of confidence and self discipline. i think it's a great thing for young boys to get involved in. girls too...

belt rank's vary from style and school. In traditional karate and wushu (kung fu) 10th degree is the highest.

cool. i tried karate when i was living in japan, but i couldn't understand the instructor cuz he was speaking japanese and i only knew a little. i was just copying everyone and felt dumb, lol. i just let my dad teach me little tricks here and there. i wouldn't be too great at it anyway, i have the attention span of fly when it comes to stuff like that.

i figure if i ever get in a fight, i'll just go on pure adrenaline and anger and start swinging.

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Originally posted by Slylee i figure if i ever get in a fight, i'll just go on pure adrenaline and anger and start swinging.

Thats the logic for most people, esspecially guys. A majority of men think all they need to do is lift weights and rely on strength, power and adrenaline to win a fight. I just hope they keep thinking that way, it keeps fights short and sweet

Psh most fights end after I tell (and by tell i mean going from a whisper to satan yelling) them that Im going split their skulls on the pavement and smooth their hair back so the last thing they see as the life fades from their eyes is my blood spattered face.

People as a whole are a frightened, cowardly, indecisive, herd of sheep. Then as you go into different sections you get the people who are too stupid to be afraid and cant fight, The insane people who snap into rages and cant fight, the guy and his friend who cant fight, the confident people who took a style of fighting and have never actually been in a fight which means they cant fight, and finally- the 1% of people who are confident, have trained, and have fought. The odds of running into this person (or being one) are pretty ... fucking ... low.

So you spook em a bit. Give them a little preview of whats gonna happen if they try something. It invokes immediate fight or flight. With a propensity towards flight.

One showdown my brother had was with some Army dude who thought he was tough. My brother walks out of the bar with him, leans forward and tells the guy (TONS of people watching) that he can swing first. He has 10 seconds to hit or hes a pussy and the fights over.

he counted down slowly. hit 1. fight was over, he threw his hands up in disgust and walked past the guy.

ARgh! so many different kinds of chickenshits out there. They all crack under the same pressures however.

the only chickenshit to fear is one with a group of other chickenshits. Thats where you bite the nose off the first guy who reaches you then run like hell, giggling insanely all the way.

quote:

Originally posted by Orbax Psh most fights end after I tell (and by tell i mean going from a whisper to satan yelling) them that Im going split their skulls on the pavement and smooth their hair back so the last thing they see as the life fades from their eyes is my blood spattered face. People as a whole are a frightened, cowardly, indecisive, herd of sheep. Then as you go into different sections you get the people who are too stupid to be afraid and cant fight, The insane people who snap into rages and cant fight, the guy and his friend who cant fight, the confident people who took a style of fighting and have never actually been in a fight which means they cant fight, and finally- the 1% of people who are confident, have trained, and have fought. The odds of running into this person (or being one) are pretty ... fucking ... low. So you spook em a bit. Give them a little preview of whats gonna happen if they try something. It invokes immediate fight or flight. With a propensity towards flight.

Do you instigate a lot of fights? Or do they just happen upon you?

quote:

Originally posted by Orbax the confident people who took a style of fighting and have never actually been in a fight which means they cant fight, and finally- the 1% of people who are confident, have trained, and have fought. The odds of running into this person (or being one) are pretty ... fucking ... low.

This is why people who do martial arts spar and usually train like there is no tomorrow, and for those who are like me, instigate fights to turn practice into practicality.

Whenever I need the confidence to do something I just get a hold of my good friend Jack Daniels - and I think Ima need him tonight!

"Hello Jack? Oh hi Mrs Daniels, is Jack in? He what? Oh my god! Oh god im so so sorry... How'd it happen? The wheat thresher? Oh Jack, always playing with that wheat thresher! Why?!?"

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee ok i obviously offended you. sorry.

You couldn't if you tried

I was actually refering to the fact that anybody who's been here more than 12 months will remember that moaning and bitching about what a bad hand they were dealt was all you actually used to do.

I'm very glad you've found happiness in your life however, I just find it slightly annoying that you seem to think you're something special for doing so.

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