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I've sort of lived this rule with the amount of income I'm currently receiving and think it's fairly acceptable through out a shared lifestyle.
The only time I think it's necessary to share a bank account is when there is a share in responsibilities. Meaning, if you file for a loan (as a married couple), it should be signed by both the husband and the wife thus meaning we are both accountable for this loan. In any way shape or form, if both names are on the loan agreement, both parties are responsible for up to half of what is loaned. Same goes for a mortgage on a house, a stock market investment or any venture capital investments going forward.
At this time, the budgeting of money is ultra important. Even if I (or she) for that matter made a significant amount of money more than the other, I think a joint account would only prove it's usage for these responsibilities that we have both signed for.
Until then, I think keeping independant accounts is fair enough until the decision is made to sign for something in both names. At a later (less risk) date when say a marriage is complete with children, then we can discuss the distribution of finances that should help cover the cost of living expenses and future investments for your children. I'm a huge advocate of saving money for my children right off the bat, meaning at the age of 18, they will have access to money that has aged over the course of their lifetime. The interest rates are outstanding for nominal investments.
I think all of the money should be put into one account. In my opinion, when you marry someone, you are essentially merging into one entity that is working toward the same end, and therefore, all of what you have, and all of what he has becomes the both of yours. Having seperate accounts insinuates that something belongs solely to one or the other of the couple, and that to me defeats the entire point of marriage.
Joint accounts are very very very evil. Don't ask. Bad experiance.
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| Originally posted by Theresa I think all of the money should be put into one account. In my opinion, when you marry someone, you are essentially merging into one entity that is working toward the same end, and therefore, all of what you have, and all of what he has becomes the both of yours. Having seperate accounts insinuates that something belongs solely to one or the other of the couple, and that to me defeats the entire point of marriage. |
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| Originally posted by Ygrene I dunno, I think everyone has to find their own happy medium. I mean, if I was still buying records, would that be fair to make that purchase out of a joint bank account? Keep in mind that this expense is around $150/month and is nothing more than a hobby. I know if my wife was buying Hallmark collectible figurines at the rate of $150/month out of *our* money, I'd be like WTF!! Since we have separate checking, separate savings, and joint savings....as long as she fulfills her end of the joint account, I don't care what goes on in her individual accounts and vice versa (sometimes, lol) |
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| Originally posted by Theresa Meh. Either way, that $150/mth is being taken away from the collective money used for the both of you. I think there should obviously be an allowance/mth, and all large purchases above that allowance need to be mutually decided upon. You work for the both of you, not just for yourself. Therefore, the money coming in should be equally available to either partner. |
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| Originally posted by Ygrene Agreed. Let's get married. |
personally, me and my right hand share the same bank accounts.
A: It depends on whether both people are working paying jobs.
B: Make 1 account.
C: Whoever is better at handling all of it, just by skill set alone, takes care of the finances. Keep each other informed (especially for investments), but the paying/budget-setting isn't going to go to the college dropout instead of the Finance major, just because he's male, or just so she can establish equality. That's silly.
D. If both people have jobs, get 1 account and treat the contributions as equal. Whoever makes more makes more. Doesn't get rid of the incentive to make more, but can account for other, non-monetary contributions.
...I'd still want a pre-nup, though. I don't want the decision to stay with someone to have to be based on convenience or financial consequences.
i think every angle on this topic has been covered... so ill just repeat what has been said but in my own way...
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| Originally posted by Temperate Seperate accounts are much better, because you never know if you will seperate or divorce. |
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| Originally posted by Moral Hazard The way I see it is as follows; Marriage is meant to be a total and equal partnership. In my view both of those need to be true in order for it to work (or work well anyway). The problem seperate accounts brings is that it inevitably leads to a financial dispairity between the partners. As we all know money is power therefore it follows that a difference in the financial footing of the partners creates a power inbalance. Now this can be great if you happen to be the one with more power, however, if one has more power then their partner the "equal" partnership simply doesn't exist. No one should ever have the upper hand in a marriage.... there should be no hands. |
Right now we have a joint account with one checking and one savings. Once I'm done with immigration and can get a job up here, I plan to open another checking account, and then from there we plan to pool a savings account as a certain percentage of our wages.
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| Originally posted by Theresa In my opinion, when you marry someone, you are essentially merging into one entity |
get away from me bitch i'm my own man and you aint tellin me how to spend my cheeese. 
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| Originally posted by Inconspicuous ...I'd still want a pre-nup, though. . |
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| Originally posted by Theresa In my opinion, when you marry someone, you are essentially signing a piece of paper. |
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| Originally posted by Zewad if you think you are currently worth enough at the beginning of the marriage that you might be worried she'll take if you divorce,... if not b/c most of us here on TA now i wouldnt think are the multi-millionaires that would require said pre-nup.. |
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| Originally posted by paranoik0 fixed |
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| Originally posted by Theresa True, but that isn't what marriage symbolizes to me. |
keep everything separate.
weigh the pros and cons btwn separate or joint accounts and you'll see.
think in terms of if u split, and if you don't think in those terms, that's just being in denial and dumb.
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| Originally posted by Azia keep everything separate. weigh the pros and cons btwn separate or joint accounts and you'll see. think in terms of if u split, and if you don't think in those terms, that's just being in denial and dumb. |
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| Originally posted by igottaknow what? little pink hearts, rainbows, and unicorns? |
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| Originally posted by Azia keep everything separate. weigh the pros and cons btwn separate or joint accounts and you'll see. think in terms of if u split, and if you don't think in those terms, that's just being in denial and dumb. |
the whole attitude like, "well if u get divorced, then bla bla bla" so non-challantly, like it's more of a "when" and not "if" is disturbing to me. no wonder the divorce rate is so high. it's sad.
It's still afact though. I'd rather be prepared for it & then not have to deal with that than not think about it and get slapped in the face by it.
sorta like Clarance Worley's mentality in True Romance.
It's better to have a gun and not need it, than to not have a gun and need it.
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