TranceAddict Forums (www.tranceaddict.com/forums)
- Canada - Toronto & Southern Ont.
-- what would YOU do...need some serious advice
Pages (5): « 1 2 [3] 4 5 »

evil so what did you tip afterwards? standard 15% or did u throw in a lil extra somethin somethin for the mess you caused?

quote:

Originally posted by Invasionmix It actually makes me wanna go to the restaurant :P What kind of food it is? (sorry a bit off topic) :S

LOL + fucking one


Its 1:14am and Im feeling a lil bit hungry ...

Is it still open??

Spontaneous TOTA trip? I'm down like mowtown

If the parents are acting this way after the fact and showing a disgusting lack of flexibility/compassion...chances are good to great that they contributed significantly to the problem in the first place.....wanting your child to stay in prison and in isolation to get over drug addiction? honestly.....that is so harsh, cold, and entirely uncharacteristic of the way parents should act towards their children. The parents are clearly doing what's in THEIR own interests and it's probably what they've being doing their entire life with the kid.

quote:

Originally posted by Vivid Boy evil so what did you tip afterwards? standard 15% or did u throw in a lil extra somethin somethin for the mess you caused?

I think it seems to me that Michael owns his own restaurant

quote:

Originally posted by slingshot If the parents are acting this way after the fact and showing a disgusting lack of flexibility/compassion...chances are good to great that they contributed significantly to the problem in the first place.....wanting your child to stay in prison and in isolation to get over drug addiction? honestly.....that is so harsh, cold, and entirely uncharacteristic of the way parents should act towards their children. The parents are clearly doing what's in THEIR own interests and it's probably what they've being doing their entire life with the kid.

So many people like this. It's never their fault, but someone else's.

Putting their own kid away in jail so that their mistake don't show in public?

Unbelievable.

quote:

Originally posted by Ania_xox Is it still open?? Spontaneous TOTA trip? I'm down like mowtown

lol if it was the summer I would be totally down, but I don't like being the cold :S Anyways threadcrapping is not cool lol.

quote:

Originally posted by Yohan Putting their own kid away in jail so that their mistake don't show in public? Unbelievable.

The only reason why this is all happening in this situation.

quote:

Originally posted by Invasionmix lol if it was the summer I would be totally down, but I don't like being the cold :S Anyways threadcrapping is not cool lol.

+1
*apologizes and mentally tucks away new vocab: "threadcrapping"*

anyway thanks for the reply guys, I think I figured out what I need to do...

there is really no good way to approach this no matter how you slice it, it's just fucked up man =/ but I guess I can take comfort in that fact...heh

And yes Yohan, we were open. We�re located in a business district so most of our customers are regulars, which was good...cause they understood the situation and walked away with no ill feelings.

honesty will close lots of doors for you because, lets be real, in this time and age people often dont wanna hear the truth.

but when you go to bed, you'll be able to sleep much easier knowing that your hands are clean. take my word on that.

tell your friend what happened.

hes not your friend anymore right?
cut all ties and cut the experience out of your life.
he obviously was going to be arrested anyway .. youre helping him
just think of it like that

if he comes after you when he gets out.. THEN tell him his parents did it

Given the fact that his parents absolutely disrespected your relationship with him, and also you by bringing this mess into your place of business, you have every reason to be extremely pissed off.

That being said, the solution to this problem is difficult. As you said, you haven't talked to him in over a year. Does he mean enough to you to get yourself more involved in this situation (telling him his parents lied to him will do this)?

If you do decide to tell him, you must think about why you are doing it. Is it to clear your name? If so, you shouldn't tell him. Do you think telling them will help him more than not telling him? If so, then you should tell him.

Also, I think that some people in here are being a bit too harsh with this "self-righteous" arguement. evil_cookie currently has an old friend in jail for what seems to be like a decent amount of time, getting "medical treatment" he probably doesn't want, and he is unfairly putting 100% of the blame on evil_cookie. That must be extremely difficult to live with for evil_cookie.

Based on what little I know of the situation, I wouldn't tell the parents, but would understandably be very upset knowing that my friend is sitting in jail hating me. However, I am sure there is a lot more to the situation that only the thread creator knows.

Good luck with this man. This is an extremely shitty situation that has been dropped in your lap. You did not deserve this at all.

Btw, I would reccommend posting this topic in http://www.bluelight.nu in the Dark Side forum. People who post on that forum are sadly more experienced with situations like this, and would probably be able to provide you with some valuable insight.

The truth for sure. If the friend is schizo then no matter what evil cookie says they won't believe them, also let the family own up to what they've done. Taking a cowardly way out by taking action and then putting ownus on the wayward/lost friend (michael) to cover for them because 'they don't want to see the badguy' is ridiculous.

quote:

Originally posted by Irishaddict Do what the family is asking you to do. It sucks for you YES, but overall if he's going to get help he needs to trust his family. They are involving the police obviously because they have exhausted all of their resources. You have every right to give the family a piece of your mind, but honestly in the interests of seeing that dude ever get better, you have to turn the other cheek with respect to telling him who called the cops. Sorry to hear though, wow, shitty day indeed.

I disagree. he's a big boy. tell him the truth.

In reality, jail is probably a far safer place for him than anywhere else.

quote:

Originally posted by oldschool420 I'd definitely tell him that his family were the ones who called the cops.

+1.

No Q about it for me.

quote:

Originally posted by Irishaddict Anyways, I'm sure you'll get a lot more self-righteousness in this thread so I will just say this: Do you want him to get better? If so, please don't make this about you. Please keep the focus on him. The truth has a way of finding itself in situations like this anyways. You don't need to exploit the process in the name of self-interest. I'm sorry this happened, but I'm just asking you to look at the bigger picture. Good luck.

Big words. Be a big person and listen to them. I would agree wholeheartedly with the above.

zokissima and Irishaddict got it right. The situation isn't really about you - let it go. This dude needs help, and if he has a chance of recovering, it's with the help of family and friends. If you told him the truth, would that be considered help? I dunno, probably not, so I'd stay out of it.

After this all blows over and he has received the correct attention for his illness and thinking with a clear mind, I think he would appreciate you telling him the truth. He would most likely see that his parents were only doing this with his best intentions in mind.

quote:

Originally posted by Jungle Fever He would most likely see that his parents were only doing this with his best intentions in mind.

Seems to me, at least from the story and from evil cookie's impressions that whether the parents have their kid's best interest at heart

you guys keep talking about "when he gets better", he'll thank everyone. he doesnt have the fuckin flu, he's schizo. Thats it thats all. theres no getting better. no matter what meds they put him on to numb his fuckin brain and make him a walking zombie it doesnt matter, its not a cure. There is no cure.

so unless he comes up drooling on evilcookies shoes one day and says "T-T-T-T-T-T-T ANK YYYYYYOOOU" while he stares blankly into space while his helmet sits crooked on his head, there is going to be no huge hero party for evil cookie with superman patting him on the back and wonderwoman comin naked out of a cake lol. There will be no long winded thank you speech from your friend who got miraculously better because of the neurological technology we have today(because their is none), and there will be no hip hip hooorays.

like someone else said the situation is fucked and forever will be, worry about how you will sleep at night at this point. Do what you feel is right. I wouldnt want to betray my friend or even worse not betray him and be portrayed as Evil_cookie the cop caller because his parents (who obviously don't give a shit) can't man up to their own actions.


dude just tell him whats up before they make him into a retard

the fact is his parents somehow knew that he was going to come to you, Maybe he speaks highly of you all the time even after the break up so to speak. so however they got the information that he was going to come to you for help, they used it to their advantage and took total advantage of you, your business, his trust with you.. everything! just so then they wouldnt look bad. Any real set of parnets would have been right there wih the police instead of hiding behind a dumpster watching from afar.

quote:

[i]Vivid Boy[b]

Wow, I LOL'd hard...He can never get better...how do you know he is skitzo and just not maybe smoking crack..not even trying to be funny, maybe he's going through withdrawal...the reason i'm saying this is tha if a member of his fam said he's skitzo, well I'd get a 2nd opinion as they proved they are desperate and willing to be untruthful. I find the term Skitzo is used loosely. He's definitely paranoid for good reason after being arrested then breaching his grounds he was given for a week and probably taking more drugs, he's obviously scared, paranoid and an addict.

Although people have been in disagreement as what you should tell him, i think you should research the situation, besides talking to his family, and overall be there for him as a friend he confided in when he met you and show him he can still confide in you, I think we can agree on that.

I am a little confused because, one of the requirements of schizo in the DSM (essentially the "bible" for diagnosis of psychiatric disorders) states that the disorder can not be drug or medically-induced.

Schizo is normally something that onsets in early adulthood-midlife (our age) because of other mental factors (ie: environmental stress) OR chemical imbalance (NATURALLY, NOT from drugs, prescription drugs, or a medical illness.)

for instance, often one has a severe MEDICAL illness that causes severe physical and metal distress, and thus schizo-LIKE symptoms. But one can not actually diagnose schizo based on drug use alone. Not to mention, the symptoms must be present for at LEAST 6 months, so I wonder how long they have been monitoring him, and what his symptoms are. I might be able to help out a little better in knowing if he is going to get "better" or not, if I knew a little more about these things.


In terms of his parents: I am assuming the court order is for him to enter TREATMENT, not jail? Just because you have a court order, and police are involved, doesnt usually mean we just toss a schizo in his cell. Espeically when he is *determined* to be mentally ill and hasnt necessarily committed a crime.

I would tell you that you need to let everything die down for a whlie and see what happens to your friend in terms of placement, as well as his emotional and mental state. You really need to evaluate if it is the right time and if it will benefit anyone besides your self to "tell on" the parents. Right now is way too emotional of a time...... and added stress on a mentally ill patient is really only hurting your friend.

HOWEVER I think its unfair that the parents put you on the spot like that. I think when the time is right, it should be the PARENTS who EVENTUALLY confess to him, NOT YOU, because it will look like a game of tattle-tale, and possibly confuse and hurt him even further. Perhaps you can talk to the parents about spekaing to your friend in the future (perhaps IN treatment, where the environment is safe to discuss these things)......... once he is more stable and ready to hear it.

It will gain his trust back both ways if he knows that these things were done in tough love and that they chose his health and emotions at the time over "who is right."

drugs cannot cause schizophrenia but if someone has it in their history or has a menatl disease but it lays dormaint, drugs can trigger it.

quote:

Originally posted by Vivid Boy drugs cannot cause schizophrenia but if someone has it in their history or has a menatl disease but it lays dormaint, drugs can trigger it.

True, but i think in this case he was away at school, occasionally sees his fam and comes back a year later all fucked up...they don't get to see it happen.

I think it could be a cop out on his folks part...I've certainly been sketchy or paranoid for a week after night/morning out.

Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright © 2000-2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.