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-- Indecisiveness vs. Indifference
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quote:

Originally posted by david.michael Halcyon, thanks for the insight. I'd say that "caring what other people think" isn't the entire problem, though. Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't care more what I think. I'd say that is definitely a big factor, though. Cheers.

Well tell me: why do you feel these are faults of yours? If that is indeed what this thread is about, and I have not merely interpreted it wrong. What makes these traits 'bad' and others 'good'? What makes you an effective individual is your ability to take advantage of your natural talents and traits - putting these things to use may require some philosophical forging, but hey - that's what philosophy is for!

I, myself, am pretty partial to people who just don't give a shit. I really cannot say that I rub well with people who are decisive all of the time or who care about every little thing. And I have no qualms in admitting my conceits - I do not rub well with people like this because *I* am not like this. Like you, I'll eat a steak most any way it's made and, like you, I can see the merit in either side of an argument. But I see no reason as to why I should be decisive all of the time or exceedingly headstrong in my beliefs - there is just as much detraction as there is benefit, in my mind. Knowing what you want is easy, even doing it is easy most of the time if you have a clear enough goal in mind - going through life with no goal nor reason though - that's tough, that takes fortitude to hack it through all of the everyday bullshit with no release. Is that what bothers you? Because it seems to me that the objections you have to your own qualities are only important insofar as they seem to be a recurring problem in which others object to - as though you are letting down their expectations somehow.

It seems to me that one of the only true freedoms that exists in this world is a person's ability to shed all sense of personal shame and to merely live their lives according to their own attributes, their own qualities - not the concerns of other people.

Of course, you could just tell everyone your a stoic man, and then whatever you do may seem mysterious and logical to them. Just a suggestion.

quote:

Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On I, myself, am pretty partial to people who just don't give a shit. I really cannot say that I rub well with people who are decisive all of the time or who care about every little thing. And I have no qualms in admitting my conceits - I do not rub well with people like this because *I* am not like this. Like you, I'll eat a steak most any way it's made and, like you, I can see the merit in either side of an argument. But I see no reason as to why I should be decisive all of the time or exceedingly headstrong in my beliefs - there is just as much detraction as there is benefit, in my mind.

I agree. Really, for the most part, I like this attribute about myself. I like not being selfish, I like not having a panic attack over trivial things, and I like getting along with damn near everyone I meet. I wouldn't really want to change it.

But, that isn't to say that it doesn't come without its down-sides. I have trouble voting in political elections, for example. Or, if two of my friends are in an argument, I feel that I shouldn't have to take sides because both of them make a valid point (and I feel it should be that way)... but, by not taking sides, people default to assuming that you're taking the other side. Or, you are viewed as wishy-washy.

I guess what it comes down to is that I hate when I see people who will agree with everything that you say, and then turn around and say the complete opposite to someone else in order to be in agreement with them... a "yes man" who says whatever they can to gain favor with someone. I don't want to be viewed that way, because that's not who I am... I am simply genuinely willing to view all sides of a given story objectively. So, putting it that way, I suppose it does have something to do with what other people think. When it comes to people that I care about, I indeed care what they think of me.

I've never felt that people who 'pick sides' are worth pleasing. Once you're on "their side", you'll become that doormat you are so afraid of being. When you oppose them, you are "their enemy". Human beings don't do this. Only conservatives.

If this is about sycophants who merely hold certain opinions in order to curry favour with people who would benefit them - yes, I think that is a completely valid fear, because those people aren't really people, either. But why does that matter? Using people only works on those willing to be used, and if you have no intention of doing either, then I don't really see what you have to be afraid about.

With that said, however - what is so bad about using people to your own benefit and then promptly disposing of them afterward?

Like I said, nothing really matters in the end, because morality is a huge sham in the first place - it's exactly how others gain leverage over you, by convincing you that you are below them. Once that gossamer curtain of shame has been pulled back, however, you will see only little people and little minds behind the great song and dance of things, fit for your consumption like a buffet of buffoonery. Ha-HA!

Yeah that's right, I'm high on a Tuesday morning, fuck off.

//Wait, it IS Tuesday, right?

Well done, sir.

Thanks for the advice.

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