manipulative females - TranceAddict Forums

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Posted by Joss Weatherby on Jul-08-2009 21:38:

i was lead down this path for 9 years... its horrible.

Posted by Scottaculous on Jul-08-2009 21:41:

my cousin is getting strung along by this chick. they play text message games and he misses out on family functions for her. i keep telling him she's just playing him because it feels nice to get attention but he doesn't listen. it's ok though, he's still young.

Posted by Echo of Silence on Jul-08-2009 21:46:

quote:
Originally posted by Joss Weatherby
i was lead down this path for 9 years... its horrible.

I disagree, Nou. Allie wasn't a manipulative bitch using you 'til she found something better. You two were friends. You hung out and did stuff together. And every now and then, she had a boyfriend and that would interfere with the friendship.

Posted by Slylee on Jul-08-2009 21:47:

quote:
Originally posted by Ania_xox
go on...

lol seriously

because even the most detached player is just a sucker when in front of the girl he really wants. I think girls can get pathetic when a guy doesn't want them back, but ultimately they will move on and find another guy to fulfill their needs. I feel that guys are always at the mercy of the girl they salivate over or the girl who "gets" them.
Most single guys are helpless in terms of what they want and need. I know girls like this too, but the situation holds true more often in reverse.

If a guy strings a girl along, he is just a player and an asshole, and oftentimes it is expected of him. What I mean is, girls are often more cautious in scrutinizing guys this way. If a girl is manipulating a guy to hang around while she figures herself out but doesn't really want him in the long run, she's a cold-hearted manipulative bitch - and it wasn't expected of her.

I don't know if I'm explaining this very well but I think the distinction is rooted in traditional male and female societal roles.

hey it's a big world and you're gonna see a pattern in your circle of friends/surrounding area and i'm gonna see a pattern in mine and they can either be the same or different and it's not going to set the standard for either sex. the opposite is true for me. i often see girls who are being naive and taken advantage of by guys who are stringing them along. your statment is a blanket statement basically that's all i was saying.

Posted by Renzo on Jul-08-2009 21:49:

Posted by Joss Weatherby on Jul-08-2009 21:50:

quote:
Originally posted by Echo of Silence
I disagree, Nou. Allie wasn't a manipulative bitch using you 'til she found something better. You two were friends. You hung out and did stuff together. And every now and then, she had a boyfriend and that would interfere with the friendship.

that is true, but she used me as her pillow.... when she was lonely, and it was a real tease.

She'd need me when she was alone... and it wasnt even when she was alone, later in our friendship she only hung out with me when she had a guy but couldnt be around him for whatever reason (gone on a trip, moved to college, etc).

She just used me for her personal satisfaction and I didnt get a thing out of it. Now she pretends like I don't even fucking exist so... fuck her.

Posted by Joss Weatherby on Jul-08-2009 21:51:

quote:
Originally posted by Renzo
Yes. Friendship doesn't count here. This is about whores you're banging.

LOL I wanted to bang her!

Posted by Echo of Silence on Jul-08-2009 21:54:

k, so she prolly qualifies for Ania's definition of a manipulative female...

:/

Posted by Cloudburst on Jul-08-2009 21:59:

quote:
Originally posted by Joss Weatherby
that is true, but she used me as her pillow.... when she was lonely, and it was a real tease.

She'd need me when she was alone... and it wasnt even when she was alone, later in our friendship she only hung out with me when she had a guy but couldnt be around him for whatever reason (gone on a trip, moved to college, etc).

She just used me for her personal satisfaction and I didnt get a thing out of it. Now she pretends like I don't even fucking exist so... fuck her.

Made me think of this

quote:
DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

Posted by Unique2701 on Jul-08-2009 22:04:

Posted by Joss Weatherby on Jul-08-2009 22:12:

quote:
Originally posted by Unique2701
Sorry to say it, but if you only knew that after 9 years, then it kind of is your own fault too.

Well it wasn't painfully obvious, it would be more sporadic... I have known her 14 years total, we grew up together...

Posted by Slylee on Jul-08-2009 22:14:

and i would also like to add that anyone who acts like a doormat and gets strung along deserves to be treated like one. people need to get over themselves and learn to take a damn hint and realize when someone is "just not that into you".

i know that sounds mean and i've played the doormat role myself unfortunately, but you know what? i learned from it and i don't play that shit any more.

some people are comfortable playing the victim role. it's actually a mental disease.

Posted by Unique2701 on Jul-08-2009 22:19:

quote:
Originally posted by Slylee
some people are comfortable playing the victim role. it's actually a mental disease.

Yeah cause they find it easier than to take responsibility for their own life and happiness, and so that they can always blame it on something or someone. Kind of sad if it goes on forever..

Posted by astroboy on Jul-08-2009 23:12:

Meh I agree with Ania. I see this sort of shit more often from women. I've seen chicks follow guys around like puppy-dogs, but the guy was usually completely honest in that he just wanted sex. With the women I've seen stringing guys along, they were doing it fairly consciously.

I honestly think in general women are more superficial, manipulative and more immature than men - its a big generalization and there are a lot of exceptions, but generally I believe this to be true. But at the end of the day it's men that put themselves in these situations, if they had the cojones to talk straight to the girl and find out exactly what's going on they could avoid all this trouble.

Posted by astroboy on Jul-08-2009 23:14:

Posted by bas on Jul-09-2009 00:15:

quote:
Originally posted by Slylee
i didn't know halcyon had a girlfriend

Posted by secked on Jul-09-2009 00:30:

Posted by trancesept on Jul-09-2009 00:46:

manipulative females are fun until you realize theres no net gain in the relationship at all.

Posted by l�cid on Jul-09-2009 01:22:

quote:
Originally posted by Slylee
and i would also like to add that anyone who acts like a doormat and gets strung along deserves to be treated like one. people need to get over themselves and learn to take a damn hint and realize when someone is "just not that into you".

i know that sounds mean and i've played the doormat role myself unfortunately, but you know what? i learned from it and i don't play that shit any more.

some people are comfortable playing the victim role. it's actually a mental disease.

so true.

Posted by Joss Weatherby on Jul-09-2009 01:23:

quote:
Originally posted by astroboy
aah ye olde surrogate boyfriend syndrome.. fun times.

yea cept we started out as like normal little kids friends and then it grew into that... for the most part I just wanted to be friends but she started to make complicated.

Posted by SYSTEM-J on Jul-09-2009 01:25:

quote:
Originally posted by Unique2701
Yeah cause they find it easier than to take responsibility for their own life and happiness, and so that they can always blame it on something or someone. Kind of sad if it goes on forever..

The external locus of control.

(I learned that from a BT album.)

Posted by Yohan on Jul-09-2009 01:32:

selfish people suck

manipulative people are just people playing with other people's feelings for selfish reasons

Posted by trancechan on Jul-09-2009 01:33:

some people want to be doormats. not everyone is a leader, some are happy to be the perfect followers.

Posted by Frenchie on Jul-09-2009 01:38:

I don't believe anyone who says they've never played the manipulative role. Even just once.

Posted by Lilith on Jul-09-2009 01:43:

quote:
Originally posted by Yohan
manipulative people are just people playing with other people's feelings for selfish reasons

Most people are metaphorically speaking, lucky to find their own arse with both hands in life and naturally migrate towards people who can lead and the 'manipulated' gets to wash their hands of any personal responsibility. In a sense, both sides win.
One gets exactly what they want
One gets to lazily do nothing

Manipulating people doesn't necessary always have to be a bad thing either, provided no one is getting hurt and everyone is getting what they want out of life, be it the I want crowd and the lazy people who can dump all their personal accountability onto someone else if things balls-up and go wrong.

If I could be bothered reading back through I'm sure there's a river of endless tears from someone getting their arse hurt and blaming 'the leader' of a relationship for all their woes. But the fact is, if they where not so comfortable being the lead in the relationship, then they where obviously, entirely comfortable being dragged through the muck, doing nothing to assert their wants and then crying some more about how the other person led them to despair.

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