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-- 3some help.
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Posted by The Drow on May-04-2007 22:42:

Omg it's the swampah!!!
You don't post that much do you?

And on another note:
I think that if you two are open minded and if you don't care that both of you will have sex with someone else AFTER the threesome then things will become less complicated.
I really don't think that sex without love is cheating but that's individual and both sides have to agree on that manner.
Maybe it can solve the jealousy from hers side and your side. If you think that it will make both of you even more jealous then scratch that.
If this kind of relationship doesn't work for you I think you should:
a) back off or
b) make sure you and your gf will never see the third party again.


Omer


Posted by Caela on May-04-2007 22:44:

quote:
Originally posted by drivingforce


ok, there's a way you can get a win-win situation out of this. if you're gf has recently agreed (on her own, WITHOUT you pushing her), then there are a few things you can do.

unless she has a thing for watching you with another woman and has no interest in touching a girl, then obvi. get a straight woman.

if she is bi, then get a bi chick, let them both go at it, and don't touch the other girl until you get some kind of 'approval' or invite from your girl to go ahead with the other one in front of her. if you spring on the new girl, she may freak out and think it's a bad idea. ALWAYS make sure she knows that she is the main person in the 3some. any extra/inappropriate chemistry between you and the new girl is not going to be a good thing to deal with after the 3some is over.

like moralhazard mentioned, and you do not have a 150% solid relationship, then either don't do it (if she's straight)...or IF she's bi, on her own accord, let her pick out a girl she's attracted to...get a good buzz going on amongst your party, and let her fool around with the girl while you are pleasuring your gf. DON'T TOUCH THE OTHER GIRL!!! this may or may not work. i am in a pretty new relationship (which is why i wouldn't feel comfortable doing a full 3some), so i think this 1/2 way threesome is the way to go. lol i'll let you know later.

good luck!

quote:
Originally posted by mezzir
as a couple, my (bi) girlfriend and i have thought about it, but i've never been quite sure if it made the most sense to pursue a straight or a bi chick
opinions?


um...obviously bi so you can see them going at it.


Posted by Moral Hazard on May-07-2007 13:59:

quote:
Originally posted by mezzir
hmm this seems to be the place to ask
mostly asking mr. hazard, cause he's the one with the most experience it seems, but the question's open to anyone

as a couple, my (bi) girlfriend and i have thought about it, but i've never been quite sure if it made the most sense to pursue a straight or a bi chick
opinions?


Since your girlfriend is bi it's presumable that she will want to interact with the other woman thus a bi-girl seems the most reasonable choice. Once again, however, I stress that this all needs to be of her doing. She should choose the girl... if she asks your opinion then give it but downplay any enthusiasm, moreover, your real move to be to support her decision. It sounds like if this is to happen it will be born of her want to be with another woman, as such you need to understand that more then anything else you are mearly going to be along for the ride (pardon the pun). For the most part you role will be rellagated to that of a sex toy for the girls' play. If this bothers you then you should decline the opportunity. If you want to do this for your own enjoyment then you should decline th opportunity. As mentioned earlier; if there are any insecurities or instability in your relationship then you should decline the opportunity.

All men need to take note on this last point as it more then anything else is the most important thing to keep in mind for a successful 3some with minimal fallout: THIS IS ABOUT HER NOT YOU. You have to play to her ego, her desires, and her wants. You also need to be ever mindful of her insecurities, her emotions, and her preconceptions. As for your own wants, desires, expectations, etc. forget about them because they aren't going to be fulfilled (or if they are it's a secondary thing, certainly not her prime objective). Take a back seat, let her control every aspect of this, and think of yourself second, not first, not equal.

Finally, I have to say, to all men, that while a threesome can be quite fun in the moment it does not in any way come close to what you fantacise about and you'll likely find it less satisfying then good sex with one partner. Granted, it's a hell of a story for the grandkids but with all the potential fallout and negative consequence coupled with the only mediocore satisfaction in most cases it's really not worth it.


Posted by Silky Johnson on May-07-2007 14:04:

quote:
Originally posted by Moral Hazard
Finally, I have to say, to all men, that while a threesome can be quite fun in the moment it does not in any way come close to what you fantacise about and you'll likely find it less satisfying then good sex with one partner. Granted, it's a hell of a story for the grandkids but with all the potential fallout and negative consequence coupled with the only mediocore satisfaction in most cases it's really not worth it.




Hahaha, it's so true....even from a girl's point of view. Well no, the threesome I had was awesome...in fact it was probably what most people want when they think of a threesome. But it was a total fluke, and nobody could have planned it.

I had a foursome though, and it was pretty lame. It's funny because my bf sometimes still gets angry/jealous that I did it (without him, of course)...but he doesn't believe me that it was not at all what he thinks it was (prolly cause our threesome was so awesome).


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