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-- Cheating
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Dunno, I think it can be explained sometimes.
And I don't agree that if I've cheated once I'll definitely cheat again, that's nonsense.

quote:

Originally posted by yankeeBaby not true at all my friend. You would be surprised the people in denial, those who turn the other cheek, stay with people for whatever reason, etc.....

Well, I can believe that happens, as I know stories like that from real life - but are you really gonna tell me that's the vast majority?

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee cool...so yankeebaby. can u explain why some people get off to watching (or just thoughts of watching) their S.O. fuck someone else? i've always wondered that.

It depends on the person, because to some, its just the visualization of it all. They know their partner loves them, wants to be with them, etc...but would also love to visualize the fantasy of watching their partner with someone else. Its different to watch people as compared to being IN the action. Different views, different visions, etc...

Clearly this does NOT work for jealous types. hehe I have friends who are swingers and its their biggest joy. BUT they do everything sexually, together, and would never (and have never) "cheated." (in quotes bc many of you may still consider that cheating). They do not have sexual relations with people on their own, ever. It is simply a fantasy for them.

heres my question.


what about women who totally blow you off on msn and then come into sex threads and start spreading their vast knowledge on bjs and chaters......WHAT ABOUT THEM!?!

quote:

Originally posted by Lira Well, I can believe that happens, as I know stories like that from real life - but are you really gonna tell me that's the vast majority?

no no I didnt say "vast majority" I said "vast differences." What I am saying, is that you would be surprised how many people out there, whom WE think are holding "regular, typical relationships" are in fact, not. not a majority, but more than you would think! There are a LOT of cheaters, swingers, sexual freaks, sexual deviants, sexual addicts (not in a good way), sexual predators, etc etc.

quote:

Originally posted by Vivid Boy heres my question. what about women who totally blow you off on msn and then come into sex threads and start spreading their vast knowledge on bjs and chaters......WHAT ABOUT THEM!?!

hahahahaha read my PM fool

quote:

Originally posted by yankeeBaby no no I didnt say "vast majority" I said "vast differences." What I am saying, is that you would be surprised how many people out there, whom WE think are holding "regular, typical relationships" are in fact, not. not a majority, but more than you would think! There are a LOT of cheaters, swingers, sexual freaks, sexual deviants, sexual addicts (not in a good way), sexual predators, etc etc.

No, no, I got that. It's just that, when you said that wasn't true "at all", it sounded like most people were in denial... which definitely mustn't be the case.

But, yeah, many friends of mine are sexual predators: they have sex before dating

quote:

Originally posted by Lira No, no, I got that. It's just that, when you said that wasn't true "at all", it sounded like most people were in denial... which definitely mustn't be the case. But, yeah, many friends of mine are sexual predators: they have sex before dating

oh boy you would be surprised at how many people cheat (and their SO's dont have a CLUE!). Its VERY disturbing. I actually think the numbers are low. Sad, but true. People are good at lying and not very good at considering others feelings.

quote:

Originally posted by yankeeBaby oh boy you would be surprised at how many people cheat (and their SO's dont have a CLUE!). Its VERY disturbing. I actually think the numbers are low. Sad, but true. People are good at lying and not very good at considering others feelings.

That's what I'm talking about. Like Mike said, it takes a right scum bag to cheat, no matter what the circumstances... it doesn't surprise me that they're good at lying as well. If their partners knew what kind of lowlife they're dating, most of them would probably move on not to ever look back (which is what I originally meant to say).

quote:

Originally posted by Lira That's what I'm talking about. Like Mike said, it takes a right scum bag to cheat, no matter what the circumstances... it doesn't surprise me that they're good at lying as well. If their partners knew what kind of lowlife they're dating, most of them would probably move on not to ever look back (which is what I originally meant to say).

if someone cheats in a forest but there is nobody around to witness it...

quote:

Originally posted by pkcRAISTLIN if someone cheats in a forest but there is nobody around to witness it...

Lol, zen cheating?

quote:

Originally posted by Vivid Boy heres my question. what about women who totally blow you off on msn and then come into sex threads and start spreading their vast knowledge on bjs and chaters......WHAT ABOUT THEM!?!

i've heard about this...she's not there, seriously. shit i've called her and told her she's on ta and she honestly thought she wasn't logged on.

quote:

Originally posted by pkcRAISTLIN if someone cheats in a forest but there is nobody around to witness it...

You mean like, they're doing it with a bear?

quote:

Originally posted by Lira You mean like, they're doing it with a bear?

Depends if you count bestiality as cheating or not.

quote:

Originally posted by yankeeBaby .....seeing many stats in my field of work, it has been said that 45% of men and 30(something)% of women are currently cheating on their partner. Thats a HUGE percent if you think about it. A majority of those being cheated *ON* say that they have 100% trust and good faith that their parnter is, in fact, NOT doing so! scary!

weowch.

are you trying to scare me off from finding a nice girl to date?

quote:

Originally posted by Fledz Depends if you count bestiality as cheating or not.

With sheep its cheating.









Or thats what they say in Wales.

quote:

Originally posted by yankeeBaby I am a therapist specializing in sexuality. I will be a full-fledged sex and relationship therapist in 3 years if everything works out right. (yes, there is a difference...I have the license to practice, but just graduated grad school and need 3 years under supervision before I can go private and claim myself as a "sex therapist").

Whats that and what kind of degree do you have to get in order to enter this field? Is it like clinical psychology or something?

hiss hiss, Chrissi's being feisty!

Re: Cheating

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee cheating comes along with insecurity and selfishness. and if you are 110% confident in yourself and your relationship and you are 110% in love, then you are selfless & confident, thus, making you not a candidate to cheat.

With respect you don't come across as 110% confident, you're previous actions (phone number in supermarket) together with the fact you have cheated before lead me to believe that given the right cirumstances you would cheat again.

This is common though, and a more interesting question is why we cheat.

In my experience women cheat because they need/want to feel attractive and desirable, and guys do it mainly (although you could argue it's the same thing as with women) for sex. (Sex = Desirability.)

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee all i'm going to say is that you definitely read a little too far into my motive behind the thread. that's not even remotely close to what i was thinking...because that would mean i was thinking about that person to begin with, which i never do lol

Yeah yeah yeah, you always play people for stupid, Jamie. Obviously you did think of him because you refer to him in your first post:

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee i have cheated 3 times. once in a long distance relationship. once out of spite because he treated me like shit and i was miserable and i justified it. and then another time i just wasn't happy and was probably trying to sabotage the whole relationship.

and again, in this post:

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee yea i definitely didn't love the ones i cheated on...or respect them. one of them barely respected himself and i can't stand that. i just wasn't happy and probably wasn't ready to end it just yet (selfish and immature). the long distance one was a whole diff story and a very long time ago. i was like 20 years old. probably loved him the most. i was going to move to where he was and inside i was scared shitless to make that move so i sabotaged the relationship. it's complicated but i really did love him and i probably hurt myself just as much as i hurt him. and i'm the type of person who makes it pretty clear if i like you or not. i mean there are definitely some people out there would say, "jamie is a selfish little bitch i can't stand her" and then there's people who would tell you i'm the biggest sweetheart they've ever met who would give u the shirt off my back. i guess if i like you, i like you. and if i don't, i don't...and you'll know which category you fall under. gauss...it's possible that someone having no character and being truly fucked up at 19-20 years old could do some growing up and be of sound character by the time they are in their late 20s. if anything, i think whatever they did and lived through would give them MORE character having risen above that mentality.

In my opinion, if you really had done some growing up and if you were really of sound character by the time you were in your late 20s, you would reflect that by showing basic consideration for the feelings of others no matter how little they mean to you, now.

quote:

Originally posted by squirrelly hiss hiss, Chrissi's being feisty!

lol at the disbelief.

so the moral of this thread is if you're going to cheat - do it in the woods... with a bear.

/thread.

and don fogetti cocoa butta.

quote:

Originally posted by Echo of Silence lol at the disbelief.

you forgot to tell her it was because you were covered in my liquid spunk

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