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this is posted in the Women seeking Men section:
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| Seeking A Bunj - 22 Reply to: [email protected] Date: 2006-10-19, 7:29AM CDT I am looking for a Bunj for burrowing parties, carrot harvests and much more (non sexual! what kind of rabbit do you take me for!). Good qualities would include nice hair, clear bright eyes, and quite small in nature. If someone who is this bunj hit me up as we have a hit cd to record! |
ahhh romance
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Evangelical Christian looking for a good man - 59 I am a sixty year old transexual woman and Evangelical Christian. I live near Las Vegas. I am active in the national Gender Community, serving as Past Chairperson of IFGE . I also like trains, especially interurbans. I have a collection of beautiful Orchestrions and Nickelodeons too. I have plenty of money, however I havn't been able to find a decent man in the last 35 years. I never had a problem picking up girls for the first 25 years of my life- LOL!  but it seems like it was always a problem after my procedure. Anyway, I came to Vegas to find an open minded man, and if I can't find someone here, then I'll never find anyone  .hope to hear from you soon XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO |
to the dudes who shit outside of our hotel room in vegas - w4m - 21
Reply to: [email protected]
Date: 2007-05-22, 6:41PM PDT
Baby, what happens in Vegas... does not always need to stay in Vegas. So here's the thing, I have never been more turned on in my life than when a bunch of older, desperate men, tried to force their way into my hotel room.
When you asked me where my friend was, I was longing that you would be asking for me, so you can of course understand why I immediately turned violent. No, I wasn't angry because you and your friends were belligerently drunk... I was mad because I was missing the opportunity to sleep with someone who was so obnoxious.
Thank you and your 2 friends for trying to force your way into my room. Fighting you three off on the other side of the door was not at all scary for a small 21 year old girl. Sorry that I broke your toe when you put your foot into the door and I decided to smash it. Yes it was on purpose, and I did hear you cry like a little girl.
Also, thank you so much for flashing us so many times. I would love to say that I enjoyed the show, but quite honestly--there wasn't much worth looking at. Obviously you all thought you were well endowed, but you waving your penis in my face did not make me or any of my friends want to sleep with you... imagine that?
So when you were pounding on my door, not knocking politely, are you shocked that I didn't open for fear of being killed?
I can completely understand why you would shit outside of my door. I usually poop when I am sexually frustrated as well. Yes, my friend saw you "pop a squat" and also saw your friend pee in the hall. Nothing has ever turned me on more. Sorry for getting you kicked out of the hotel... I'm sure the cleaning staff was pleased when they had to clean up the log of shit that was in front of our door.
Sorry we missed out on that opportunity to sleep with each other. Maybe next time.
IKEA
Reply to: [email protected][/email]
Date: 2007-05-28, 10:26AM MDT
I walked in on slc punk jerking off in the restroom at ikea yesterday. I turned and walked out of there laughing so hard that an employee came up to me and asked me if anything was wrong and I just said nope all is right in the world.
And then I read this:
Pretty girls are alone and so are NICE guys. - 28
Reply to: [email][email protected]
Date: 2007-05-28, 2:45AM MDT
Some of us guys are actually pretty darn good. If we were dating you we would treat you like gold. We wouldn't find shit to pick a fight with you over because we are not into drama. We would make you laugh (myself being quite funny, but sorta cocky at the same time) as much as possible, and basically treat you right, there are some of us guys out there.
I hear all the time that women want a man that will treat them right, respect them, or just be nice to them. Sure some of you women actually do date a guy or two like that, but my experience has been that I get tossed aside for the "bad boy."
So yeah, I may not drive a motorcycle, and I may not have chistled abs, but I wouldn't cheat on someone I was dating. I would return her phone calls. I would make things that are special to her special to me. I would spend my time away from her thinking of ways to make her smile.
SO maybe I am a bit passive, and I won't pick fights with you. I am too secure in myself to do dumb shit like that. I am the type of guy that hopes his girlfriend has a life other than just him.
I am secure with who I am. Sure maybe I am not physically perfect, I am ok with that. And sure I don't make millions of dollars, yet, I am ok with that too. But I do have a good job and I do know how to please a woman. The trouble is, and this is especially true of UTAH women, a lot of you girls arent very grown up.
All i ever wanted out of life was a purpose in life (which I have), a few bucks in the bank (which I have), And a nice girl that doesn't mind being treated well (which I have yet to find).
So this is my craigslist book for you.
Oh I am 6'4" tall. I have two tattoos. I have a really good job. I shave my head. And I am painfully single, though not desperatly so.
Which made me remember this:
http://mcmayhem.livejournal.com/208...c=26&style=mine
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| To the Nice Guys Left To every guy that's said, "Sex can wait." To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful." To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town (or across the state) to see her. To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick. To every guy who has given her flowers just because. To every guy that said he would die for her. To every guy that really would. To every guy that did what she wanted to do. To every guy that cried in front of her. To every guy that she cried in front of. To every guy that holds hands with her. To every guy that kisses her with meaning. To every guy that hugs her when she's sad. To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all. To every guy who would give their jacket up for her. To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe. To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes To every guy that would give his seat up. To every guy that just wants to cuddle. To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what. To every guy who told his secrets to her. To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath. To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one. To every guy that believed in her dreams. To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them. To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams. To every guy that walked her to her car. To every guy that wasn't just trying to get laid. To every guy that gave his heart. To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her. ...This one bulletin is for you... Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore... And because of this, there are not many left out there... If you are a nice guy repost this with "We're a Dying Breed". If you are a girl that thinks every guy should try to accomplish even a few of these, repost this with: To the Nice Guys Left |
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To all the nice guys out there: fuck off and die. There's a reason nice guys finish last. Here's my own version of the bulletin going around. I've added some editor's notes. To every guy that's said, "Sex can wait:" no...no, it can't. What the hell is wrong with you? You've never tasted pussy, have you? To every guy that's said, "You're beautiful:" please. No points for creativity there. To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town (or across the state) to see her: consider the price of gas. Was it REALLY worth it, especially when she just gave you the cold shoulder for being late once you got there? To every guy that gives flowers and a card when she is sick: flowers don't cure herpes. Think of a better gift. To every guy who has given her flowers just because: you wasted your money. Flowers die. To every guy that said he would die for her: you watched "Titanic" too many times. No one really says that, do they? Please tell me no man has ever uttered those words in complete sincerity. Gag. To every guy that really would: get a fucking life. You know how many other girls there are out there? Don't waste your existence on this one. To every guy that did what she wanted to do: better damn well make sure she returns the favor. To every guy that cried in front of her: unless it was while watching the Pantera Behind the Music, you should be ashamed. To every guy that she cried in front of: oh, like THAT'S an infrequent occurrence. Don't count yourself lucky. To every guy that holds hands with her: this doesn't make you a nice guy. She was just making sure you didn't fall down and embarass her after those 8 gin and tonics. To every guy that kisses her with meaning: try kissing without meaning once in a while, just to shake things up. Pretend she's a hooker. Chicks dig that. To every guy that hugs her when she's sad: that's what you're SUPPOSED to do. Don't consider yourself a goddamn hero for it. To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all: she's suffocating. Get off. To every guy who would give their jacket up for her: didn't you question why she didn't bring her own? Dumb bitch. To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe: you just interrupted the rusty trombone she was bestowing upon the guy she met on the subway. To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes: jesus, get a fucking LIFE. To every guy that would give his seat up: you think she's less capable of standing than you are? Let her suffer a little. It was her fault she wore uncomfortable shoes. To every guy that just wants to cuddle: let's get past the lies and admit you really just want a dirty fuck. To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what: lies. All lies. She's ugly in the morning. To every guy who told his secrets to her: don't expect that she didn't run out and tell her best friend. To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath: you need a greater purpose in life. Have you tried hari krishna? To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one: big deal; I think that every time. "Maybe this could be the one who tries to kill me in my sleep and gets me on the news." To every guy that believed in her dreams: like the one where she wanted to move to Berkeley and open a vegan bakery? Anyone who buys into that kind of dream should be shot. To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them: what about your OWN dreams, douche? Quit being so self-sacrificing and work on your own life. To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams: maybe you should've laughed. Then she wouldn't have gone through the humiliation of rejection over and over and over. Nice job making her a little too cocky, kid. To every guy that walked her to her car: was it a nice car? To every guy that wasn't just trying to get laid: why not? To every guy that gave his heart: take it back. Quick. To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her: oh, like hell you do. You're mad as fuck. Admit it. This one bulletin is for you... Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore (because we're tired of dudes not just saying what they mean)... And because of this, there are not many left out there (thank god)... If you are a nice guy, repost this with "We're a Dying Breed". Expect much laughter at your expense. We are trying to extinguish your kind entirely, because you are sorry excuses for human beings. Don't fight it. Chivalry is finally dead. Let her prove herself by meeting you halfway. |
Craigslist version:
The guy at the Main Library
Reply to: [email protected]
Date: 2007-05-26, 2:32PM MDT
I met you 2 yrs ago at the Main library on the second floor. You used the line, "Do you go the U." I said no and was going to Salt Lake Community College. You have platinum hair and I kept looking at you. Shall we continue where we left off?
my version:
"I saw you on the freeway. �I was on my gsx-r 600 and you were smoking pot in the back of a honda. �My friends rode wheelies past you and you flashed me for a good mile. �We had to take an exit because one of my friends got pulled over for the wheelies. �Let's pick back up where we left off"
wow...never saw this trhead before... good one slylee, lol!
people out there are very interesting...
Thanks for starting this thread slylee, some hilarious stuff! So many freaks out there, makes me wonder if people i'm friends with like these kind of things, lmao! 
lol i'm laughing so hard. good bump!
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Originally posted by Silky Johnson  |
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| Originally posted by Miss Julia Thanks for starting this thread slylee, some hilarious stuff! So many freaks out there, makes me wonder if people i'm friends with like these kind of things, lmao! |
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| Originally posted by gehzumteufel maybe you have some extracurricular activites youd like to share? |
http://newyork.craigslist.org/brx/cas/339046547.html
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| Originally posted by enferno |
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| Originally posted by inconspicuous NSFW |
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| Originally posted by inconspicuous NSFW |
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| Originally posted by Miss Julia I do have some extracurricular activites, but not to the psychotic extent of some of these stories we have read here. LOL I'd rather not know if you or any of my other friends do weird shit like this, lol. I'm with Slylee though... I wanna write back some of these freakazoids just for the fun of it. |
so i was looking for a kitchen cart for my new place, and stumbled upon this listing...
http://milwaukee.craigslist.org/hsh/748455687.html
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| As Is, Used Butt Plug, Kitchen Cart, Lamp and Other Misc Items (West Allis) Reply to: [email protected] Date: 2008-07-09, 1:24PM CDT Here's the situation. My last roommate (Dale) screwed me over. He left a month ago and took my digital camera with him but left a bunch of his stuff. I've waited a reasonable amount of time for him to come back to reclaim his things, return the camera and pay the money he owes me. So here I am making an attempt to recoup what he owes me. After cleaning out Dale's room and taking inventory here are the things for sale along with some prices. Full size mattress, box spring and frame $20 Kitchen cart $40 Crock pot $10 Flat screen tv with remote $150 Brown Recliner $60 Floor Lamp $10 Wilderness Print $5 Lighthouse decor including Shower curtain, switchplate, 2 placques, candle, table runner and print.. all for $20 Clock $5 Toaster $5 Humidifier $10 Drinking glasses (box says 12 but there's only 10 in the box) Other plates, pots and pans $5 BUTT PLUG PRICELESS!! Interested in more than one item? Prices drop with the more you buy! Please help me get his stuff out of my house while recovering some of what he owes me. |
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| Originally posted by l�cid so i was looking for a kitchen cart for my new place, and stumbled upon this listing... http://milwaukee.craigslist.org/hsh/748455687.html and yeah, there's a picture of it too. |
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| Originally posted by tubularbills lol, nice bump |
Butt Plug Bump sounds like a form of dancing they'd ban in the movie "Footloose."
I always liked this one:
"You want the blocks? Come get the blocks, and don't fuck with me!"
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| Originally posted by Beat Blog I always liked this one: "You want the blocks? Come get the blocks, and don't fuck with me!" |
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| Originally posted by Sushipunk Hotlink fail |
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| Originally posted by Beat Blog It's still visible on my screen, perhaps you should get a better computer, or just click here: http://www.collegeslackers.com/daily_images/450.jpg |
Ok. What ever you say
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| Originally posted by Beat Blog It's still visible on my screen, perhaps you should get a better computer, or just click here: http://www.collegeslackers.com/daily_images/450.jpg |
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