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-- Would you ever have children?
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Originally posted by The17sss why not have one with your own genes ... last thing you want is to end up with one that has the retard gene or a family history of mental illness....

You answered your own question.

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Originally posted by The17sss All children are needy... why not have one with your own genes rather than some creepy outsider when you have little to no knowledge of their genetic and medical family history? Shit man... last thing you want is to end up with one that has the retard gene or a family history of mental illness.... or something crazy.

Because an adopted child is already alive - it's already here. It's different than bringing someone else to this world because you're not adding one more needy kid to the context.

As for my genes, we're not that much different to begin with. I don't think there are "outsiders" to begin with, unless you can prove me the child was brought to Earth by sneaky aliens that want to know what a human family is like.

Unlikely as it is (the alien origin, that is), I can't see a reason not to adopt a child.

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Originally posted by Lira Because an adopted child is already alive - it's already here. It's different than bringing someone else to this world because you're not adding one more needy kid to the context. As for my genes, we're not that much different to begin with. I don't think there are "outsiders" to begin with, unless you can prove me the child was brought to Earth by sneaky aliens that want to know what a human family is like. Unlikely as it is (the alien origin, that is), I can't see a reason not to adopt a child.

lol... I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that you may be asking for a world of unintended problems by adopting a "needy" child when you don't know their genetic history like you would your own. It would kinda suck if you got stuck with one that had Autism or something that would keep you in the poor house because you had to spend tons of money on treatments. If that happened with your own child, it's a different story- but I can't help but think I'd be somewhat resentful for getting myself into a situation like that becuase someone convinced me it would be more virtuous to do that than have my own. Now, if my wife and I couldn't have children, and we wanted them, we'd have no choice but to go that route. And while I'm going off on tangents, I might as well say that the fear is always there that I would not love an adpoted child as much as I would my own flesh and blood.

most guys don't like the idea of adopting because they only see one point in having children...to spread their superior genes

no offense kev but it annoys me when men say that. i have yet to meet/date a guy who is cool with adopting. if i can't have kids, i'm definitely adopting and i've also been friends with a couple of adopted kids who were fine mentally and knew they were adopted and had great adoptive parents. they went off to college and everything. i think you've seen too many movies if you think adopting is going to turn into some kind of damien child story lol




*edit* and it also proves that your love is obviously conditional if you don't feel you are able to love an adopted child as if it were your own.

quote:

Originally posted by Slylee most guys don't like the idea of adopting because they only see one point in having children...to spread their superior genes no offense kev but it annoys me when men say that. i have yet to meet/date a guy who is cool with adopting. if i can't have kids, i'm definitely adopting and i've also been friends with a couple of adopted kids who were fine mentally and knew they were adopted and had great adoptive parents. they went off to college and everything. i think you've seen too many movies if you think adopting is going to turn into some kind of damien child story lol *edit* and it also proves that your love is obviously conditional if you don't feel you are able to love an adopted child as if it were your own.

lol... no, it does not at all prove my love is conditional because it is still only a concept being discussed in the abstract; only if I adopted a child and didn't love it, or had my own child and an adopted one and loved my own child more could something like that be proved. It's a natural feeling, and some girls have it too... it's cool that you don't and I wish I could share the same sentiment, but I just don't. Doesn't make me a shallow person; could be a product of our evolution for all I know.

no trust me, it's a guy/ego thing.

quote:

Originally posted by The17sss lol... I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that you may be asking for a world of unintended problems by adopting a "needy" child when you don't know their genetic history like you would your own. It would kinda suck if you got stuck with one that had Autism or something that would keep you in the poor house because you had to spend tons of money on treatments. If that happened with your own child, it's a different story- but I can't help but think I'd be somewhat resentful for getting myself into a situation like that becuase someone convinced me it would be more virtuous to do that than have my own. Now, if my wife and I couldn't have children, and we wanted them, we'd have no choice but to go that route. And while I'm going off on tangents, I might as well say that the fear is always there that I would not love an adpoted child as much as I would my own flesh and blood.

I don't think paternity matters that much in the long run: you will eventually create a bond with the child, specially if you need to care for him/her.

As for the kid with Autism, I think it's only natural that you should only adopt such a child if you're sure you can pay for all the expenses you know you'll have (if you're a millionaire, for example, this is hardly a problem), otherwise you may be doing the child a disfavour. If that happened to your own child, the only difference is that this is not something you can know beforehand. It's not unlike an accident, and that can happen to the rich and the poor alike.

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Originally posted by Slylee i have yet to meet/date a guy who is cool with adopting

Off-line, you mean? If not, you just met one!

(and I'm taken, by the way )

most of you sound highly unrealistic here. You all have big plans of how your kids will 'not' be like the others. That is easy to say when your sitting here on TA . If it was so easy to have perfect little angels, then everyone would have them.

I think most people should not have kids. myself included.

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Originally posted by Slylee no trust me, it's a guy/ego thing.

This sounds like your "Men are responsible for all fucked-up women" theory.

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Originally posted by jennypie That would imply you've done growing up to begin with. You have a long way to go, honey.

why do you always act like your SOO mature. I'm sure you are SOO mature and responsible even though you spend time posting on forums with the likes of me.

quote:

Originally posted by jennypie How come IGK hasn't been here talking about how delicious babies are yet?

fixed.

btw children are cute and everything, but I would not want to take care of it full time. Call it what you want, selfish, cold hearted whatever. But it really would not be right for me unless I had a complete lifestyle change

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Originally posted by jennypie I judge women who don't breastfeed.

i completely agree with this...however you're quite a judmental cunt for a nurse. Maybe it's just your online fake persona.

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Originally posted by jennypie I judge women who don't breastfeed.

My mom told me she breastfed me, and because of that she went from a C to an A. I'm a B... I don't want to be -A because of my baby.

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Originally posted by beersANDblunts why do you always act like your SOO mature. I'm sure you are SOO mature and responsible even though you spend time posting on forums with the likes of me.

Yeah ok Tricia you fat liar.

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Originally posted by Danny Ocean i completely agree with this...however you're quite a judmental cunt for a nurse. Maybe it's just your online fake persona.

Sorry I'm not 100% an angel all the time.

sorry im bieng an asshole. I apoligize. I am very crazy

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Originally posted by jennypie Yeah ok Tricia you fat liar.

awesome

quote:

Originally posted by beersANDblunts most of you sound highly unrealistic here. You all have big plans of how your kids will 'not' be like the others. That is easy to say when your sitting here on TA . If it was so easy to have perfect little angels, then everyone would have them. I think most people should not have kids. myself included.

uh no dude, the reason why there aren't a bunch of perfect little angels running around earth is because the people who have them are lazy, selfish pricks acting like they are the best parents in the world, when really all they're doing is spoiling the fucking shit out of them with material objects to compensate for not being a better parent.

quote:

Originally posted by jennypie Sorry I'm not 100% an angel all the time.

aww its ok, i'de still let you change my bandages.

Slylee, I agree with you and you are most likely right. All I am trying to say is most people really shouldnt have kids for one reason or another (financial concerns,bieng lazy,selfishness). Just look at some of the responses in this thread. I am clearly not cut out at all to be a parent. You might be, good for you.

Ill repeat what I said in my first post

I think most people should not have kids. myself included.

can't take baby to a rave. she would suffocate in the wardrobe

edit: do raves even exist anymore?

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Originally posted by jennypie Yukii should just stfu when adults are talking.

im sorry but i lol'd

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Originally posted by Slylee yea actually i get nervous holding other people's babies when they are in the infant stage.

i was forced to take a picture with my baby cousin and i was on panic mode the whole time, i dont know how to hold em, they drool all over your clothes and fuck they are kinda heavy!

was scared i would drop him

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