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Oh for f*cks sake......cigarette smokers/addicts, read if bored......
Yep, sport trance with another "book" for you to read......
anyone who cares less about addiction or habits, probably will not be interested. But if you are a real smoker, and are/or was a slave to some form of some addictve substance at one point, u might find this interesting.......
lets begin.....
So i've been smoking for 7 years........past two years have been a pack and a half to two packs a day.......
My throat was kind of aching oddly last week, so I naturally, as a smoker got a little concerned. Called the doc, set up an appointment, went last friday. Fortunately, nothing was wrong, but my throat was severely irritated. Ofcourse, this wasnt just from smoking, anyone who has acid reflux disease knows that this is very common. But they also know (like i always have), that smoking cigarettes is possibly one of the worst things to do if you have it. (ofcourse, its just plain bad anyways).
To be quite honest, I was very nervous, and very anxious at the doc. I've known him and his nurse since I was a kid, and really do trust them. However, I was just plain, really nervous. For the obvious reasons. No smoker likes to feel serious chest pain, or rather abnormal throat pain.
Anyway, so after some miserable tests and gagging everything came clear, except ofcourse that my throat was extremely irritated. I was still scared outta my head some, especially when I then realized, I truly do, for the first REAL time, have to quit smoking.
I've attempted to quit in the past (not long ago actually, about 5 months ago), just for "good health" reasons, and well, as an addict (yeah i admit), it was subconsciously written in the back of my head, that I probably would start again, and that if I did, then well, I did. I went for 5 total days without a smoke, then eventually, I snapped, got tired of the BS, and broke 
However, this time, is really, really, different. This time, I have an absolutely reason to quit. I have visual evidence that it isn't doing me any good what so ever, and definitely won't if I continue. On my last attempt, I didn't have this. It wasn't a quarter as difficult as it is now, because like I said. the last time, subconsciously, I knew I was probably going back, and it was just my "first attempt".
Now its quite simply like this. I have to. I can't explain it, but I do know, I have to. Unfortunately, I do not want to, at, all. Health reasons yes, but naturally as a human, I miss it terribly, and probably always will. I am going on day 5 of being smoke free, haven't smoked since i left the doctors office. (except for tonight, where I cracked (didnt break), and lit up on the way home). I needed a reminder of why I was quitting, and ofcourse after 5 days of no smoking at all, a cigarette isn't a quarter as good as usual, mentally and physically.
So here I am. The nights have been the toughest. I can honestly say I can relate to the misery of rehab. (I admit, I am/was a completely dependant chain smoker). It isn't so difficult during the day, but it is, during the night, when i'm sitting at my computer, listening to my music, and chatting/browsing boards.
For those that don't smoke, or don't smoke too much, i'll explain the world of cigarettes a bit. It is MORE than the nicotine thats addictive. I don't mean the 1000 extra crap chemicals they throw in either. Its a giant issue psychologicaly. Its something you look forward to, something that really helps you relax. something that keeps you busy, something that helps you think, something that even almost entertains you, and so so so much more. Some people can smoke for 4 years, and drop it like a hat. Then, there are the others, like me, who have a "bit" more trouble.
Unfortunately since highschool, i've relied and depended on cigarettes, and that was many years ago. We all had our tough times, and quite honestly, I can say cigarettes was one of those things that did help me through. I always love, during times of stress, to go outside, sit down/walk around, light up a smoke, evaluate the issue, relax, and come back in. I always loved sneaking out of class/lunch, to get my beautiful 10 minutes, of no teachers, no work, and just sitting down in my car, with a friend, talking, and enjoying a simple smoke. It was almost if I came into class, ready to go again. (ofcourse I was fiening all the classes before). But oh how good those smokes were. And for those long nights at clubs, i'd have, standing at the bar, with a beautiful buzz off vodka 
, and a nice smoke to top off the cake. Instead of coke/crack, heroin, weed, and all those other drugs that almost every curious kid falls into, I fell into cigarettes. Don't let me forget to mention, I make a living with computers, and well, if theres anywhere you will see me smoking, its AT THE COMPUTER.
Here I am, 5 days, no smoke, and quite honestly, I feel lost. Its literally as if, a companion, is gone. Like something is seriously missing. Though my cravings arent a quarter as strong as they first were, I know my craving mentally, will be there for months to come. Its the mental cravings, that are THE WORST. As I like to say, 95% of smoking, is mental. Any REAL smoker knows this. The fact that I just moved into a totally new place, and that one of my pets ran away, isn't helping much either......yeah sounds ridiculous, but if u love youre pet, youd be upset too.
Anxiety, nerves, stress, pressure, worriedness, dizzy, confused, lost, just to name a few of the emotions. All over one fuckin thing. Its incredible how far and bad its built up. I've been taking nicotine lozenges, which have helped tremendously, but lets face it, they arent cigarettes. The patch works great as well, however, like it says, it will cause lucid dreams, and problems with sleeping. I found out first hand.
This, just, plain, doesn't, feel, like, me. I GREW up with smoking, and now, its gone.
Ahh how pathetic this all must look to a non-smoker, or non-addict of anything. I can understand it, 100%. It is pathetic, it is ridiculous, but it is also, a real drug. As I said, more mentally than physically. I can beat the fuckin cravings, but its the battle of the mind that eats ya up. The physical and mental both work together, to create "balance". Most people that have quit smoking, honestly can say, it wasnt THIS difficult, but there are a quite a huge number of former addicts out there, that can say it is/was. Great to know i'm not completely nuts.
One thing that made me laugh the other night in a chat room, was someone stated "i'd quit smoking if i got a warranty that I wouldnt get hit by a truck tomorrow". Oh how true that is I must say. That, is thinking like a true addict. There IS NO guarantee that an addict will die of smoking, ofcourse, it increases the chances in half, but then again, there is no guarantee. It does not help us young cigarette smokers to see 70 year olds walking around in decent health and still alive, who have been smoking their ENTIRE life. Ofcourse, there are the obvious negatives and side effects to smoking, hard to breathe, just plain unhealthy, etc.etc.... I unfortunately have seen first hand, enough evidence, to prove, that, you can go, anytime, no matter how healthy you are, etc.etc.etc....... there, now im speaking like an addict, but unfortunately, that is the truth, most non-smokers hate to hear. Remember non-smokers, people smoke, because they like it, (or love it). If health wasn't an issue, believe me, 50% of the world would follow, if they already havent. Sickening really.
Anyway, so i'm completely beginning to ramble, but about 20 minutes ago, I was walking outside, and thinking of having a second smoke. Its that second smoke, that kills all that power youve built up over the last few days of being smoke free, its that second smoke, that usually breaks you. I dont know why but I went on TA, opened a thread, and decided to go ahead and post this.
This is more of a venting post, than anything. Honestly, im not looking for advice on how to quit, believe me, I do know how, its just a matter of be bitching and complaining while i'm doing it. Eitherway, I appreciate it if you did read it, i'm sure it kept ya busy for about 5 minutes with quality reading material (thumbs up, big smile).
At this point I honestly cannot tell you if I can go on forever without smoking again, its a very hard concept to see, but we'll just have to see how things work out. I'm sure/hope once i'm out of this depressive mode of mental and physical withdrawals, i'll be seeing a new light. Time will tell.
hey man, I respect that alot.
I've never smoked cigs, probably never will (marijuana doesn't count, and then I've only done it twice) but my dad was a fucking horrible chain smoker when I was a kid. I forget what made my dad quit, but I know it was pretty hard for him.
Good luck in your battle, and I hope you find your pet. 
PS. If it helps any bit, my Grandpa is like 80+ years old, smokes like a bitch and still takes bus/skytrain to work sometimes!
been smoking since 10, man
[seriously since 13]
and i support your decision,
and i support you
what you did, though
taking the time to write that [distract yoursef]
that's a good idea
continue to do that,
or even get some external motivation
just for extra support
it was actually external factors...external enforced motivation that helped me quit during periods of time
i.e. my parents, moving, distractions
im visiting them right now...
it's like a fuking rehab center 
good luck, man
'Not a time to quit smoking kids, hahaha But I fucking did it. And yes, I miss' em. It is hard to quit smoking. Everyone of them looks real good to me right now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus, and moistened shut with Claudia Schiffer's pussy right now' - bill hicks
on non-smokers, seehere
hope you make it
| quote: |
| Originally posted by emono i.e. my parents, moving, distractions im visiting them right now... it's like a fuking rehab center |
oh..and good luck quitting..i know its hard..but very well worth it
We are habitual creatures...breaking the habit voluntarily goes against "doing what you want to do" but sometimes you need the short term pain for the long term gain
(I didn't mean for that to rhyme)
well ive been smoking for 6 years now...thank goodness i havent reached the pack and a half a day...thankfully its cos of money constraints...
im trying to slowly reduce the number of cigarettes a day and eventually quit...however summer is not the best time to do so..
the only reason why i still smoke is cos when u reach the chain stage, ur metabolism is affected cos ur brain stops producing nicotine and u need that external source...i have to train my brain to start producing it again but it will only be eventually and no way cold turey
i can relate. the first few times i tried to quite i knew it was moer a temporary leave of absence. then i quite for real and i knew that cigarettes will own a part of me for the rest of my life. it is sad, really, that i have given up control.
but oh, the nicotine... god i miss it.
i want a cig.
- My uncle had the same problem with the throat pain. His experience was so bad because first the fucking doctors said it was AIDS. Imagine how bad my uncle felt, then they said it was like cancer or some shit. But no, it was the disease. Anyways, my uncle stills smokes today, but, he says he's progressing, since he claims he smokes ONLY 5 a day. Mmm I still find it odd that he says that like its soem big accomplishment.
SportTrance, I relate with what you're saying. Quitting smoking is one of the hardest things to do, especially when there are so many associations that we form with cigarattes and smoking. For me it has to be having a smoke before I go to work or class in the morning. Anyway, best of luck.
-dave
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Swamper We are habitual creatures...breaking the habit voluntarily goes against "doing what you want to do" but sometimes you need the short term pain for the long term gain (I didn't mean for that to rhyme) |
yo man i totally agree with what ya doing me 2 trying to quit smokin after 4.5 yrs cos i heard somewhere if u quit b4 five years your lungs can heal themselves somewhat. i m down to like 3 or 4 a day now but damn man i know what u mean the worst time i fiend smokes is when i m bored. what do y'all think bout products which help ya quit smoking anybody know any which effectively work? but i dunno i think its harder to quit mentally than physicaly
| quote: |
| but, he says he's progressing, since he claims he smokes ONLY 5 a day. Mmm I still find it odd that he says that like its soem big accomplishment. |
what baffles me is why do people even BEGIN smoking? what the fuck does smoking do for you in the first place? i would never date anyone who smokes. i'd like to know from a smoker why one would even start in the first place. peer pressure? to be cool? cuz it "feels" good? im not trying to put down any smokers here...if you think i am i apologize but for me this is a serious question
I dont smoke, but i know one thing, always carry gum, it will at least aid you in calming your nerves when you get pent up from cravings good luck m8
why start illegally and underage anyway?
ooh im a rebel
| quote: |
| Originally posted by mndeg why start illegally and underage anyway? ooh im a rebel |
hrmm im going thru the same trouble atm. well my throats been fucked up for the longest time now but i thought it was maybe allergy cuz i dunno.. combination of cold & allergy 
anyways what i noticed was that i have no trouble quitting smoking when i feel like it but, it kills me when i know that my body cant have it.. if that makes sense??? ive been able to quit smoking cold turkey and go like that for several months straight.. but this time, i know that i dont want to quit and to know that my body cant take it anymore... 
part of it is nicotine withdrawl but its almost psychological that i need the nicotine. if that makes sense??? ive been so edgy & bitchy as of late b/c i cant smoke... my body is just not use to functioning w/o the nicotine... gah, i wanna pull out my hair!!!
-BLuEOcEaN420
Good read man, I don't smoke but I fully support your decision. At least you doing the right thing, which is more than I can say about the millions of other people that continue to smoke. You can make it through this. Just think, your on your way to a cleaner and healthier lifestyle now 
Honestly, I didn't expect this many replies, but definitely appreciate it.
I just wrote another book, sorry
TuanAnh,
to answer your question. Which is an extremely common for someone who has never smoked. Any smoker has heard it a lot, dont worry.
I'll honestly tell you how I eventually started. When you FIRST start smoking, you don't feel the real effects that you do, once you become addicted. Its why ALOT of people, take a puff, cough their head off, get dizzy, and sometimes even throw up. Fortunately, thats why 80% of people turn it away and never do it again. Infact, anyones first 5 packs of cigarettes, aren't even close, to what addicted smokers feel. First time you put those chemicals in your body with a strong drag, you're gonna feel it. The mental addiction isn't there, its just the physical, and you don't even feel the real physical addiction, until much later on if you continue.
On my first real cigarette puff, I didn't cough a bit. Infact, I got an extreme buzz, that at the age of 15, I had never experienced before in my life. This was pretty much related to the fact that a parent of mine smokes. It was a pretty extreme buzz, that I continuously got, for every cig I had lit. Over time however, the buzz started to go away, and the cravings started to creep in.
Now you're probably asking, why did I even try it? well, simple. I was 15, young, ignorant, my father had just died 4 months earlier, and quite honestly, i didnt give a flying fuck about anything. I wanted something new, I was in need of some escape. and to be quite honest, if I was going to do any drugs, I believe to this day that nicotine is probably the "better" road to take if you're a kid thats GOING to experiment (that or weed, but as much as people hate it, weed is a gateway drug lol). Atleast a better "road" compared to all the other shit out there, x, heroin, coke, crack, etc. Which is/was around. So there's why I started. I'm not trying to justify it as being ok, but I can assure you, about 20,000 kids ive never met who were just like me, took the very wrong road, and arent here with us today (some i do know)
70% of REAL smokers start as a teenager. Every real smoker I have known, started as a kid. I mean the factors are all there, curiousity, experimentation, ignorance, obliviousness, invincibility, etc, etc.. I mean fuck it, i'll admit, I was a crazy young jackass who didnt give a shit about anything. WHY WOULDNT I start smoking? man i didnt give a fuck lol.... That explains why those who started at the age of a teenager, carry it on into their adult life, even AFTER they are completely educated, and hit reality. Why? because technically, you grew up with it. As a teenager, the difference from the age of 15 to 20, is TREMENDOUS. Regardless if you like it or not, you DO change. However, along with that change, is your pack of cigarettes. Right there by your side. Kind of like a brother or sister, or someone/something you love, you grow up with it, its HARD to let it go, especially if it is something that has helped you calm down, relax, and think. That is why I was sitting here last night, mentioning how when quitting, you feel lost. Like walking around without your watch, you feel naked.
I do however, think to START smoking at an age of 20 or older, is pretty stupid. As you grow up, you start taking life more seriously, you realize you're not invisible, and you're completely educated on all aspects.
and you asked what does it do for you.
Read my first post completely, and you'll pretty much see what it does for ME, atleast. But I think i speak for almost all smokers with my first post.
Hope I explained some.
And dont worry, I wish I never started, all smokers wish they never started. Unfortunately, cigarettes and the habit itself, is that one of the many FEW drugs that just works perfect with people. EXCLUDING ALL HEALTH issues, it just plain fits like a glove. It keeps your hands and mouth busy (people LIKE relaxing habits, this is one), it requires inhaling and exhaling (which calms you, with or without smoke), it doesn't disable your thinking, it doesnt put you out of commission (mentally or physically), it is (was) affordable, its easily accessible, and the nicotine alone is a strong satisfaction. Society really tends to forget now days and takes for granted totally, that it is in no way different, what so ever, than any other addictive chemical drug out there. You can't blame society though for taking it granted though, especially, when its the one drug you can (or could) do anywhere, whether it be at a restaurant, driving a car, or sitting at home. Lets not forget its LEGAL, and available at that store around the corner. The way society has it set up, makes it just plain work perfectly. I can assure you if nicotine was no longer distributed with tobacco (or any other form), it eventually would turn underground like every other addictive chemical out there, right next to heroin.
Hope I maybe explained it better some.
Thanks for reading page 2 of my book
| quote: |
| ive been able to quit smoking cold turkey and go like that for several months straight.. |
Nice post SportTrance.. I totally agree with ya.. I have been smoking for about 4 years and I've been realizing that smoking does nothing but harm you in various ways.. I have thinking about quitting few times in the past but I've always thought"Ok, 1 more than I will stop" which was stupid and It never happened..I still smoke a pack of day... After reading this posts, I decide to quit smoke once again, I donno if I can totally quit but this time I will start from right this moment..I live in Korea where 80% of my age males smoke and this enviroment doesnt help me quitting smoke but I realized its just stupid excuse to keep smoke. Its definitly MENTAL... just like any other drugs.. I hope I can win this fight against myself.. Hopefully we will both win...
Thx for great thread..
| quote: |
| Originally posted by BLuEOcEaN420 hrmm im going thru the same trouble atm. well my throats been fucked up for the longest time now but i thought it was maybe allergy cuz i dunno.. combination of cold & allergy anyways what i noticed was that i have no trouble quitting smoking when i feel like it but, it kills me when i know that my body cant have it.. if that makes sense??? ive been able to quit smoking cold turkey and go like that for several months straight.. but this time, i know that i dont want to quit and to know that my body cant take it anymore... part of it is nicotine withdrawl but its almost psychological that i need the nicotine. if that makes sense??? ive been so edgy & bitchy as of late b/c i cant smoke... my body is just not use to functioning w/o the nicotine... gah, i wanna pull out my hair!!!-BLuEOcEaN420 |
why do you start smoking?
aside from teh mental addiction and oral fixation, which you obviously dont have when you start, it is a physical thing.
Nicotine is a GREAT stress reliever. Unfortunately it is also highly addictive. But seriously, if you are stressed, and you smoke a cig, the anxiety melts away. And if you havent had one in a while (or never) you get a buzz too. I dont really care for the buzz, but I live with a lot of stress and i live for the reprieve. or at least i did till i quit...
well there goes any hope of me quitting smoking, ever...
| quote: |
| Originally posted by TranceGeek well there goes any hope of me quitting smoking, ever... |
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