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-- Must Read!!!

Posted by Orbax on Sep-12-2003 20:28:

Must Read!!!

A man had a terrible passion for baked beans, but they always had a somewhat lively effect on him. After he met the woman of his dreams, he made the supreme sacrifice and gave them up; he couldn't imagine subjecting his new wife to his beastly emissions.
On his birthday, his car broke down, so he called his wife and told her that he'd have to walk home. He walked past a cafe and the wonderful aroma of baked beans overwhelmed him. Since he was still a couple of miles from home, he figured he could indulge and then walk off any ill effects. So he had three extra large helpings of beans, and he "put-putted" all the way home.

His wife met him at the door and seemed somewhat excited. She exclaimed, "Darling, I have the most wonderful surprise for you for dinner tonight!"

She blindfolded him and led him to his chair at the head of the table, making him promise not to peek. At this point, he was beginning to feel something coming on. Just as she was about to remove the blindfold, the telephone rang and she went to answer it.

While she was gone, he seized the opportunity. He shifted his weight to one leg and let go. It was not only loud, but ripe as a rotten egg. He gasped and felt for his napkin, and fanned the air about him. He had just started to feel better, when another urge came on. This one sounded like a diesel engine revving, and smelled even worse. He tried flapping his arms to clear the air. But another one snuck out, and the windows rattled, the dishes on the table shook, and a minute later, the flowers on the table were dead.

When he heard his wife ending her conversation, he neatly laid his napkin on his lap and folded his hands on top of it. He was the picture of innocence when she walked in.

Apologizing for taking so long, she asked if he had peeked at the dinner table. He assured her that he had not, so she removed the blindfold and yelled, "Surprise!!!"

To his shock and horror, there were 12 dinner guests seated around the table for his surprise birthday party.

Posted by crchingtiger on Sep-12-2003 20:32:

hahahahahahaha

Posted by Spike on Sep-12-2003 22:38:

lol thats a good one!

Posted by DjSimonB on Sep-12-2003 22:55:

Seen it before, but still a classic

Posted by Dmatrox on Sep-13-2003 00:28:

yeah seen it before, pretty funny.

Posted by EssentialMix3r on Sep-13-2003 07:01:

Serious, how much would this fuckin' suck if it it really happened?

Posted by TOR on Sep-13-2003 09:11:

classic

Posted by DJ Freestyle on Sep-14-2003 04:16:

Good one!

Posted by StuartLittle on Sep-14-2003 11:37:

what a pissa