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-- The Sick-ass Lobster Story *Warning* *Very Sick*
The Sick-ass Lobster Story *Warning* *Very Sick*
The Sick-ass Lobster Story
One morning around 5am, 22 year old Susan DeLucci of Kittery, Maine, woke up with a painful need to urinate. At first she thought she had diarrhea, but when she stood up out of bed, she realized that it was urinary pain. It was very similar to the feeling of having diarrhea, just out the wrong hole. She wobbled to the toilet and upon sitting on it, her vagina erupted into the most horrific messy farting noise anyone has ever heard. In paralyzing pain, Ms. DeLucci for the next few minutes continued to push and squirt out of her vagina, a burning tide of wretch and filth while she gripped the sides of the toilet, white-knuckled. She was screaming wildly, and the neighbors called the police.
When medics arrived they found Ms. DeLucci unconscious lying on the floor of her bathroom wearing nothing but her bath robe. Running down her leg, was a stream of brown and green syrup. The medic had to transfer her to a stretcher, so he grabbed her left leg which was bent crossing her other leg, to straighten her out. She was lying there all twisted up. When he lifted her left leg to straighten her body out, he exposed her vagina at which point a creature, no larger than the tip of a finger wormed its way out of her genitals and landed on the floor with a wet popping sound.
Shocked, the medic stared at the creature that was lying on the tiled bathroom floor in a casing of mucous. It was a tiny mud shrimp and it sat there on the cold floor gasping for water while flipping itself back and forth. The horrified medic turned to the toilet as he felt the nausea setting in. When he put his face down into the toilet to puke what he saw was so horrific that to this day he cannot look into a toilet without convulsing. The entire toilet bowl was boiling with baby brown mud shrimp flipping and splashing at a furious pace.
If you think that is bad - wait until you hear how it happened:
Ms DeLucci's death was the result of a combination of shock and severe head trauma. She stood up over the toilet in pain and when she saw what she had done, she went into shock and fell, smashing her head on the toilet and then on the floor.
It is believed by police that two nights before the accident she had purchased a live lobster at a fish market. While lying in a tub, she
gently inserted the creature's tail into her vagina to derive physical pleasure. At that point, she held a lighter under the creature's face causing it to flip its tail in a violent snapping motion.
The medics found a lesbian XXX video in the VCR and the TV was positioned on a table in front of the tub. The lobster was found in the kitchen garbage can wrapped in a paper bag. Traces of Ms. DeLucci's DNA were found on the lobster along with pubic hairs that had wedged themselves between the lobsters' tail joints. The lobster's face was lightly burned with the same fuel used in lighters.
The lobster's digestive track and colon were found to be full of mud shrimp egg casings. Doctors believe that the lobster had eaten them (they are common in the water at fish markets and are usually harmlessly boiled to death) and the lobster had crapped them out into Ms. DeLucci's vagina when she was torturing it.
Maine mud shrimp only take two days to gestate and Ms. DeLucci was only four days away from getting her period. Doctors believe that at that point of her menstrual cycle, her womb was the perfect PH balance to grow these mud shrimp which are a much larger version of the popular "SeaMonkey" pets sold throughout the US. Overnight the eggs had hatched and the mud shrimp began doubling in size every ten minutes!!!
You can imagine the pain she was in when she woke up that morning and gave birth to well over 1,000 mud shrimp in her toilet.........
hmmm, ya quite sick 
this has been posted in the humour forum a couple of times before tho...and i've recieved it in my mail a few times too 
oh it has, i read it like last year and i found it in my documents earlier...but if everyone has seen it then ill delete
that is sooo nasty!!
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Raekwon The Che oh it has, i read it like last year and i found it in my documents earlier...but if everyone has seen it then ill delete |
!!! Heres some more stuff
hmmm...pic's not working Raekwon
i don't think consumption junction allows links...that's what the page says anyway
heheh, but i found this one
http://www.************************/...iew.asp?ID=5763 hehehe!!!
ahh friggen
http://64.62.54.44/adult_cdn/01048A...EqC/cj_5179.jpg
ahh well, it works for me
Hmmm, I have heard this before as well, but I must be honest and
say that it smacks of urban legend to me.
I read tbhis story I long time ago, and it really is sick story
Yeah, my first reaction was that it was an urban legend too.
Lots of similar stories to this one floating about (like with spider eggs in the stomach, cockroaches in the ear etc, etc.).
Actually, having said that, I read about a woman in a newspaper (The Age here in Melbourne has an "odd spot" which is just a small article on the front of the paper that reports the lighter side of the news) who went to the doctor complaining of hearing scratching noises all the time, and when the doctor examined her ear he found a live earwig which had obviously been in there for at least a couple of days.
So I guess it's possible, but I'd take it with a grain of salt. 
wow...
Damm , this is some sick stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aaawwwww...... waaaaaacala ! see what happens to crazy nuts in need of pleasure chicks!!!
That's a Darwin award candidate.
She sure does!! ahh..continuing the survival of the fittest..too bad for her!
| quote: |
| Originally posted by havok118 That's a Darwin award candidate. |
| quote: |
| man, what people do these days |
| quote: |
| Originally posted by TranceFusion agreed with ya there plastikE, kinda like the speed and ballet thing eh? |
| quote: |
| ****runs around his office naked in insanity**** |
LOL
that was so funny and disgusting at the same time
OH MY FUCKING GOD!
im never gonna even think of touching a girl ever again.. sick people, all off them.. god... ahh shit... thats disgusting
HOLY FUCKING SHIT
That's absolutely horrifying. Sounds exactly like something i'd see in the x-files.
I found info about this urban legend here:
http://www.google.com/search?q=cach...ci+snopes&hl=en[/url]
check it out!!
| quote: |
| Origins: After scanning this little piece of junior high school scatology, we truly hope we will "read [only] one disgusting story this year." Unfortunately, it's only January, so our chances of success are dim. What else can one say but someone had too much time on his hands? The silly little gem quoted above appeared on the Internet in January 2000. It combines the bestial impregnation motif of the "woman impregnated with octopus eggs" with the "animal used as masturbatory toy" motif of the gerbil tale. The kinky masturbation theme from the "girl and the hot dog" tale gets worked into the mix, too. As usual, we have a detail indicating homosexuality -- "the medics found a lesbian XXX video in the VCR" -- because we all know from similar tales that no woman ever masturbates unless she can't (or won't) find a real man to pleasure her. (This same notion is found in the legend about the woman, her dog, and some peanut butter.) Considering the deviance of the fictitional woman's crime, it's no wonder the author of the piece has her die. Considering his writing skills, we think it's a shame he didn't pen a similar ending for himself. The "writer" at least managed to include a few details in his piece (i.e., the woman's name and home town), but that's about all he got right in terms of credibility. The narrative has a few glaring plotting errors: Ms. DaLucci (assuming that is her name, since three different spellings of her surname appear in the text) "held a lighter under the creature's face" while she was "lying in a tub"? Does she carry a cigarette lighter that works underwater, or was she sitting with a live lobster in a bathtub empty of water? (It's not an experiment we'd be so cruel as to perform, but we doubt a lobster placed in a dry tub and burned in the face with a lighter would provide very many minutes' worth of "pleasure" for anyone.) We're told that the dying woman made "the most horrific messy farting noise anyone has ever heard," and we're told about what she felt and thought -- she "woke up with a painful need to urinate," "at first she thought she had diarrhea," "she realized that it was urinary pain" -- yet she was clearly alone in the house at the time (neighbors hear her screams and called the police) and was unconscious when paramedics reached her. (There's no indication she ever regained consciousness and explained herself, since we're also told only what the "medical police" believed had occurred rather than anything they learned from questioning the victim.) Mud shrimp (corophium volutator) are critters about half a centimeter long. They can reach populations of 63,000 per square meter in optimal conditions. They exist only in Canada's Bay of Fundy and serve as food for sandpipers. As well, brine shrimp take a day to hatch, not two. They also won't hatch out in anything less than extremely salty water, a substance not found in a woman's vagina. It also takes more than salty water and eggs to bring about hatching -- exposure to light within the first few hours of incubation is key. Brine shrimp growers recommend the eggs be exposed to a light source throughout incubation. Constant aeration (bubbling) is also necessary to provide sufficient oxygen levels for the eggs to hatch, this is also not a condition found in a woman's vagina. |
well said goodnet,and or research. eatherway nice job.
so, muh ma fuckin laptop got fried...
ah'm now without uh geekbox fo' uh few weeks
dere goes all muh ma fuckin mp3s an' all dat
ah will still be back every now an' then, ah'll just be usin' muh ma fuckin parents geekbox
when ah do git muh ma fuckin laptop back, ah'll gots ta spend uh few evenings downloading tunes ag'in, ah th'o't ah wuz in da area o' 3000 mp3s...
*sigh*
an' all muh ma fuckin progs iz gone too, thats going ta take uh bit ta git together
ah only hope dat ah can salvage some o' muh ma fuckin sheeit dat wuz on dere, or else all o' muh ma fuckin skoo sheeit iz gone an' gots ta be redone as well
anywho, anyone dat has uh full version o' tracktor an' rebirth, would ya be able ta hook me up? send me uh PM if ya can.. thanks
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Palivar so, muh ma fuckin laptop got fried... ah'm now without uh geekbox fo' uh few weeks dere goes all muh ma fuckin mp3s an' all dat ah will still be back every now an' then, ah'll just be usin' muh ma fuckin parents geekbox when ah do git muh ma fuckin laptop back, ah'll gots ta spend uh few evenings downloading tunes ag'in, ah th'o't ah wuz in da area o' 3000 mp3s... *sigh* an' all muh ma fuckin progs iz gone too, thats going ta take uh bit ta git together ah only hope dat ah can salvage some o' muh ma fuckin sheeit dat wuz on dere, or else all o' muh ma fuckin skoo sheeit iz gone an' gots ta be redone as well anywho, anyone dat has uh full version o' tracktor an' rebirth, would ya be able ta hook me up? send me uh PM if ya can.. thanks |
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