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Dealing with the end of a relationship

I always thought to myself i'd never start a relationship thread, but once again i'm proving myself wrong. Basically, my gf of a bit over 4 months broke up with me monday afternoon, and it came as a bit of a suprise. she stressed over and over that it wasn't me and she just would be hurting me more in the long run, but if anything it made me feel worse cause she didn't even give me anything to blame on myself, and helplessness is the fucking worst feeling in the world.
so for anyone who's been in this situation, what the hell am i supposed to do? its not like i can care for her with all the world on day then a few days later just be normal, i haven't slept more than like 4-5 hours and haven't been eating just cause everything seems slightly off w/o her. this sucks.
and as much as i want to do everything in my power to get her back, she specifically said she just needs time to herself and the one thign i don't make exceptions for is respecting honesty and respecting her opinion, so it leaves me with nothing i can do
does this just go away or something or do i need to go get fucked up for a night or go flirt with someone else or what, cause this blows

to me shes trying to swerve around the real reason for wanting a break with you and giving you an excuse.

well dude only advice i can give you is :

* dont mope around feeling sorry for yourself
* always try and keep busy by doing things each day and eventually the hurt will slowly disappear. Time will heal it. Just keep positive man

Theres nothing much more that you can do but get on with ure life. Take it as an experience and if a situation comes up again like this ull know how to deal with it better.

Re: Dealing with the end of a relationship

quote:

Originally posted by mezzir so it leaves me with nothing i can do

Just have to get over it, dude. Life goes on.

seriously...4 months isn't that bad in the scheme of things, but i remember when i was still young and dated a girl for about 3 months then we just broke up all of a sudden. it was a complete shock...well not completely looking back at it i could see the signs, but i didn't want it to be over.

what actually was going on was that she just wasn't really ready for a relationship at that point. she had some bad ones in the past and was just having an emotional time.

i was upset about it until i found someone new...that helped a lot. later on...she admitted to my friend that she had been a real bitch to me and told her what a sweet guy i really was and how dumb she was, but...too late.

as far as seeing other people. just make sure that you don't go and get in a relationship that you don't really want right now because in essence you might be doing the same thing to that person that you are going through, but it does help to have someone else...

thanks for the support people
and btw she wasn't trying to get around any real reason, she's been having trouble at home etc and i don't really blame her, its a lotta shit to deal with at once
life does go on
its just weird changing it unexpectedly

dude, sorry to hear that...


i'd say run a shitload and play some ultimate, it always seems to cheer me up

quote:

Originally posted by whiskers dude, sorry to hear that... i'd say run a shitload and play some ultimate, it always seems to cheer me up

and you'd be right
sucks though, we did stadiums yesterday and probably just cause i haven't slept or eaten much of anything lately i couldn't finish it off, did 4 sets of 5 and could barely keep from throwing up
ultimate fuckin rocks
and btw, we're gonna beat UMass this year
that and win the invitational, i swear we'll do both this season if it kills us

and btw, i'm coming to UMass next year

In my opinion, something nice would be to write a poem, paint something, write some music or justa basically do anything involved with arts, since the best inspiration usually comes from sadness, plus, by doing this, you will be letting all your feelings flow.

Just wait, and time will take care of everything, and as Floorfiller said, don't rush and get involved in a relationship just to forget... it'll maybe work, but you can hurt somebody.

Anyway, that's just my two cents.










...Don't worry man, eventually you'll get over it.

quote:

Originally posted by mezzir and btw, we're gonna beat UMass this year

you will cuz i'm not playing



and the invitational... paideia did lose a bunch of good guys...


you're coming to UMass? SWEET!! i'm currently trying to plan out my schedule so that i can go to fall practices... cuz not being able to play in the spring SUCKS

quote:

Originally posted by NinetyNinety In my opinion, something nice would be to write a poem, paint something, write some music or justa basically do anything involved with arts, since the best inspiration usually comes from sadness, plus, by doing this, you will be letting all your feelings flow.

Yyyeeeaaaah, I'd say you want to be doing everything you can to *forget* about it. Because that's basically it - forget about her, you don't need her, if she's got problems then let her deal with 'em, they aren't your responsibility.

Don't say another word and don't give her a second thought. Best strategy is to find someone else. I don't suppose she has any hot friends?

get as drunk as me

hijacked! cause ultimate is more interesting right now

quote:

Originally posted by whiskers you will cuz i'm not playing and the invitational... paideia did lose a bunch of good guys... you're coming to UMass? SWEET!! i'm currently trying to plan out my schedule so that i can go to fall practices... cuz not being able to play in the spring SUCKS

yeah why don't you play in the spring anyways? never quite knew. and maybe now that i'm gonna go to UMass i can finally meet someone from TA that i didn't invite here in the first place

aah man this weekend we went to the Yale cup, got top 8 i think, but we did pretty well in the games we lost. it was dope though, i'm a new player so i don't play much and in one game we were down like 5-1 quick cause she had been playing the subs since it was supposed to be an easy game. so she put the starters back in and they brought it back a bit by half, then a few points into the second half she finally put me in (even though i had played like 2 points all day i didn't make it in the first half before the starters went back in) and i got a lay out D on my man who was cutting to the break side, then after a few passes broke the mark with a backhand for the score
it was dope, i think i made a good impression

quote:

Originally posted by mezzir hijacked! cause ultimate is more interesting right now yeah why don't you play in the spring anyways? never quite knew. and maybe now that i'm gonna go to UMass i can finally meet someone from TA that i didn't invite here in the first place aah man this weekend we went to the Yale cup, got top 8 i think, but we did pretty well in the games we lost. it was dope though, i'm a new player so i don't play much and in one game we were down like 5-1 quick cause she had been playing the subs since it was supposed to be an easy game. so she put the starters back in and they brought it back a bit by half, then a few points into the second half she finally put me in (even though i had played like 2 points all day i didn't make it in the first half before the starters went back in) and i got a lay out D on my man who was cutting to the break side, then after a few passes broke the mark with a backhand for the score it was dope, i think i made a good impression

lol, ultimate talk, turns me on


i was gonna play but then i had to take college writing and it interferes with practice + i have a gay compsci professor who thinks we shouldn't have lives so he assigns us 12 hours of homework a week + reading

i love it when Tiina does the thing with the subs, cuz each time we played you guys you'd get 2 points ahead and she'd put the subs in and then we'd totally tool on them and she'd be like "will, ari, get back in"

shiat, i'm still bitter at having it 11-9 and then losing it 13-15 or whatever it was in 2002 nationals... shiat, 3rd place in the country isn't bad for a junior but 2nd or maybe even first would've been way better... damn, i think i need to practice more because i thinking i'm losing my magic throws...

girlies this hunk is on the rebound..



trying to help the best i can man

there's no better cure than a boy's day out, seriously.

if she were having a hard time at home or wherever else, that's more of a reason not to let you go btw.

quote:

Originally posted by whiskers lol, ultimate talk, turns me on i was gonna play but then i had to take college writing and it interferes with practice + i have a gay compsci professor who thinks we shouldn't have lives so he assigns us 12 hours of homework a week + reading i love it when Tiina does the thing with the subs, cuz each time we played you guys you'd get 2 points ahead and she'd put the subs in and then we'd totally tool on them and she'd be like "will, ari, get back in" shiat, i'm still bitter at having it 11-9 and then losing it 13-15 or whatever it was in 2002 nationals... shiat, 3rd place in the country isn't bad for a junior but 2nd or maybe even first would've been way better... damn, i think i need to practice more because i thinking i'm losing my magic throws...

should i let you know if we're gonna play pick up sometime or something?
sounds like you're deprived

vivid: appreciate it as usual but this place isn't usually the greatest place for attracting chicas

elena: amen to the boys day out, i got a week off next week so that should help. and the stuff at home was eating her time more and more and she was getting more and more down, and while i coulda helped she said she didn't wanna hurt me anymore, cause it was getting me down too
eh idk, i'll talk to her in a few days or something

back to ultimate talk!

Tufts (Black) v. MIT (Red) this weekend at the Yale Cup

quote:

Originally posted by mezzir Tufts (Black) v. MIT (Red) this weekend at the Yale Cup

fack, that dude got skied!!




i don't have any good ones, but this one was pretty funny:











look at will, he's humping that dude in mid-air!!!!!!!


hope you're all cheered up now, man, all this ultimate talk

seriously, as hard as it is just find a distraction (another girl is the best solution) and 2), if your out and about with your friends or whatever, ignore her as she wishes, BUT make sure you look like your having a great time without her. if she wants you back, she'll coem for you. were you guys serious at all after 4 months? cos i have a little rule with serious relationships... only beg once (if at all) after pleading once never show you care, are unhappy etc etc. and the best way to get over someone (as hard as it is again) is to break any form of contact at all with her, includign phone calls or seeing. if you avoid her for long enough-things will sort em selves out.

quote:

Originally posted by whiskers fack, that dude got skied!! i don't have any good ones, but this one was pretty funny: look at will, he's humping that dude in mid-air!!!!!!! hope you're all cheered up now, man, all this ultimate talk

aaah that made my day
i'm so showing will that tomorrow

Re: Dealing with the end of a relationship

quote:

Originally posted by mezzir I always thought to myself i'd never start a relationship thread, but once again i'm proving myself wrong. Basically, my gf of a bit over 4 months broke up with me monday afternoon, and it came as a bit of a suprise. she stressed over and over that it wasn't me and she just would be hurting me more in the long run, but if anything it made me feel worse cause she didn't even give me anything to blame on myself, and helplessness is the fucking worst feeling in the world. so for anyone who's been in this situation, what the hell am i supposed to do? its not like i can care for her with all the world on day then a few days later just be normal, i haven't slept more than like 4-5 hours and haven't been eating just cause everything seems slightly off w/o her. this sucks. and as much as i want to do everything in my power to get her back, she specifically said she just needs time to herself and the one thign i don't make exceptions for is respecting honesty and respecting her opinion, so it leaves me with nothing i can do does this just go away or something or do i need to go get fucked up for a night or go flirt with someone else or what, cause this blows

Ok... imagine this... Your girl goes out on a date with some dude... She gets hammered. He starts sucking her face on the way to his car. She gets all worked up. On the way home she's giving him a hummer of his life while he fingers her. Then he takes her to his place, rips her clothes off and bangs the crap out of her while she's screaming her head off. How's that for a visual? Oh, what? that's cruel?

Guess what... GET THE FUCK OVER IT AND BE THE DUDE IN THIS STORY BUT WITH A DIFFERENT GIRL. This will fix you up. Look, I've had my share of stories just like yours and the only thing that fixed it was time. Nothing else. no convincing, no happy words, nothing. You know what else it means? It means you're mommas boy who has hard time being entertained on your own. You think chick wants some dude who will hang on to her like shit to shoe on a hot summer day? NO! She wants someone who can have fun no matter what. If you need someone to complete you or you're lonely alone - get some hobby. Go out meet people. I know its hard, you don't want to. You want to be in a relationship. But guess what? Fuck it... IF you get back together it would be waste of your time. NO WOMAN IS WORTH GOING BACK FOR IF SHE DUMPS YOU. None. I don't care what you say. I don't care what she thinks. I don't care how good she was to you or in bed or whatever. If she didn't find any good reasons to stick around with you first time around, by taking her back you'll be the proverbial dog that gets kicked but still runs to his master when he calls.

FUCK HER, get over yourself, find some hobby, jerk off, run around, get stoned, GET A FUCKING LIFE AND GET OVER HER. The moment you get yourself together, chicks will flock to you, even if you're one hell of an ugly mofo. As long as you're not a dick, can hold your own, have some sense and sense of humor - you're as good as golden.

Sorry if some of it is harsh - but I speak from experience and like I said above... read it again if it don't make sense.

P.S. SHE WILL (IF SHE HASN'T ALREADY) DO ALL THE DIRTY THINGS TO SOMEONE ELSE THAT SHE DID TO YOU. OH, YOU DON'T THINK SO??????

i know you think you're being all helpful, but for CHRIST SAKE lay off the fucking crisitism. you know absolutely NOTHING about my life, aside from what i shared in my first post, and all I said i wanted was just perhaps some sympathy, i was mainly doing it to get some feelings out.
and now here comes you, sharing a nice vivid story about how i should go get rebound action by taking advantage of some random chick, yeah sounds fucking great you numbskull.

quote:

If you need someone to complete you or you're lonely alone - get some hobby. Go out meet people. I know its hard, you don't want to. You want to be in a relationship. But guess what? Fuck it... IF you get back together it would be waste of your time.

and while we're making sweeping generalizations based on nothing but a few strange personal experiences, i'm going to assume you've never been in a relationship where the other person means something besides the fact that she has a nice warm place to stick your dick when you get horny
i'm not saying we had true love or anything like that, but for shit's sake i stated that its been two days and i'm breaking a 4 month routine, and let alone the fact that its a relationship, even if it was a friend moving away, things are going to be weird for a little bit
and one other thing, if we never invested anything in relationships besides 'the one', the one that we were meant for or w/e you believe in, then wtf would we do with the rest of the time? as for now, i've found the best i've ever had and i'll be damned if i'm just gonna sit and get over it in a day
so pardon my french, CynepMeh, but fuck you.

quote:

Originally posted by mezzir i know you think you're being all helpful, but for CHRIST SAKE lay off the fucking crisitism. you know absolutely NOTHING about my life, aside from what i shared in my first post, and all I said i wanted was just perhaps some sympathy, i was mainly doing it to get some feelings out. and now here comes you, sharing a nice vivid story about how i should go get rebound action by taking advantage of some random chick, yeah sounds fucking great you numbskull. and while we're making sweeping generalizations based on nothing but a few strange personal experiences, i'm going to assume you've never been in a relationship where the other person means something besides the fact that she has a nice warm place to stick your dick when you get horny i'm not saying we had true love or anything like that, but for shit's sake i stated that its been two days and i'm breaking a 4 month routine, and let alone the fact that its a relationship, even if it was a friend moving away, things are going to be weird for a little bit and one other thing, if we never invested anything in relationships besides 'the one', the one that we were meant for or w/e you believe in, then wtf would we do with the rest of the time? as for now, i've found the best i've ever had and i'll be damned if i'm just gonna sit and get over it in a day so pardon my french, CynepMeh, but fuck you.

dude... you're a pathetic loser. That's all I got to say. I had a relationship with a girl for 3.5 years - we were best friends, of all things. Break up was a mutual decision. Took me over 2 years to get over it. Guess what - makes you one hard core mother******. I think I lost a part of me in the process. Sorry I can't give you a nice big hug and let you cry on my shoulder. But for every story you got for me, I bet I can top it 100X. Guess what... YOU WILL FIND SOMEONE ELSE THAT YOU WILL CONSIDER "THE ONE". You will then remember my words. Until then.... forgive my crude german "Fuck you too"

Happy now?

P.S. Don't take it personal - I'm sure your suffering and sharing is very near and dear to you. Sad you don't have close friends to give you support in this time of need and you got to share it here with bunch of strangers. Some of whom are assholes like... me.

Later... hope u'll feel better soon.

go to your nearest strip bar and get yourself a lap dance



cheers
indy

Hooters is the closest thing to a strip club ive ever been to, and it was only once and it was a month ago (almost 21!)

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