What do you Do? - TranceAddict Forums

TranceAddict Forums (www.tranceaddict.com/forums)
- Canada - Toronto & Southern Ont.
-- What do you Do?
Pages (2): [1] 2 »

Posted by Callie5 on Aug-03-2004 19:41:

What do you Do?

What do you do....when you can't STAND the person your best friend is dating???

Posted by newr on Aug-03-2004 19:43:

Throw her in the river with her clothes on... off his boathouse

Posted by starsearcher on Aug-03-2004 19:44:

Just let them be...Life's not perfect

Posted by starsearcher on Aug-03-2004 19:44:

quote:
Originally posted by newr
Throw her in the river with her clothes on... off his boathouse

Posted by ShadoWolf on Aug-03-2004 19:45:

mack h3r

Posted by Callie5 on Aug-03-2004 19:46:

quote:
Originally posted by newr
Throw her in the river with her clothes on... off his boathouse

Been there... done that... got the t-shirt...

I'm serious... I can't tell my bud that I hate his chick, but I'm not one to pretend to like someone...

Posted by d!abolic on Aug-03-2004 20:03:

quote:
Originally posted by Callie5
I'm serious... I can't tell my bud that I hate his chick
Sure you can, but that's about all you CAN do

Posted by j_spot on Aug-03-2004 20:06:

find a wedge.
A friend/co worker who can get between the guy and girl, and make them cheat.

Posted by Nalin on Aug-03-2004 20:06:

quote:
Originally posted by d!abolic
Sure you can, but that's about all you CAN do

exactly.

even though its not really your business, if you tell him, you better have some damn good reasons (stuff that compromise his gf's integrity, character etc) and of course say it nicely/caringly not angrily.

Posted by Callie5 on Aug-03-2004 20:08:

I'm not sayin a word until he asks and I'm just waitin on that one... It's not just me... the ENTIRE group is having issues with her

Posted by reverieX2 on Aug-03-2004 20:13:

Yeah I�m goin through this problem.

My buddy recently moved to Ottawa (from Oakville) and he used to stay with me whenever he came down to visit. But now he's staying with this chick!!!
No one can stand her. He never parties with us any more when he comes down, doesn�t even chill with us. I would even tolerate her if they both came out with us. I dunno what to do, he's visiting again this weekend so we'll see what happens. I think he's startin to feel guilty maybe we can play that up
Anyway I feel you pain.

Peace

Posted by rabbitjoker on Aug-03-2004 20:13:

Who is your daddy, and what does he do?

Posted by crazedcanuck on Aug-03-2004 20:24:

quote:
Originally posted by rabbitjoker
Who is your daddy, and what does he do?

You know you are RJ.

Posted by Cataclysmic on Aug-03-2004 20:30:

I'm in the same boat right now. A good friend is dating an absolute bitch. I definitely can't say anything to him, as it would only end up in him resenting me. This guy used to be up for anything, and everything. Now he can't walk five fuckin' feet away from his lady friend. She's one helluva bitch as well.

In time hopefully he'll realize that he's isolating himself from his friends, and that his girl is a bitch. Seeing a friend happy supersedes my personal opinion of his girlfriend though.

Posted by Kytracid on Aug-03-2004 20:45:

Re: What do you Do?

quote:
Originally posted by Callie5
What do you do....when you can't STAND the person your best friend is dating???

How about you do nothing, and just let your friend date this girl. It's really none of your business to interfere is it ? If you can't stand her, that's fine, there's no rule that says you have to love your best friends girl. If he knows you well, then he'll realize that you both don't click, and might try to do something about it. Either way, the decision between best friend or girl-friend should be his, no ?

If he values your friendship while also enjoying the company of his new girlfriend, maybe you guys will find a way work it out. Otherwise, i guess one of the two relationships will inevitably suffer.

Bare in mind, I'm being general in my advice here, cause i'm not sure why you (and your friends group) hate this girl, but if she's really bad news (potential serial killer, vicious man-eating bitch, blood sucking harpy etc) then i would find the appropriate time to mention it to him, and hope that he respects me enough to realize i'm just looking out for him.

Hope this helps.

Posted by StereoPrincess on Aug-03-2004 21:09:

what's wrong with her?

maybe you are just not giving her the benefit of the doubt. if your friend likes her, what's wrong with her that you don't like her?

Posted by Durafei on Aug-03-2004 21:16:

quote:
I'm in the same boat right now. A good friend is dating an absolute bitch. I definitely can't say anything to him, as it would only end up in him resenting me. This guy used to be up for anything, and everything. Now he can't walk five fuckin' feet away from his lady friend. She's one helluva bitch as well.

Unfortunately that's a problem for many guys who just start dating a girl. I've personally been in that boat myself - where for a few months of the relationship I willingly and unwillingly spent most of the time with my g/f rather than with old friends.

So my point is - when such a thing happens to a guy, you can't really blame his g/f for it.

Posted by trancechaos on Aug-04-2004 00:16:

i've been in that situation several times, i have one friend that constantly dated girls i hated, i just told him plain and simple that i didnt like his girls. if you are really friends with the dude just be honest so that you can avoid any bad experiences.

in my case i told my friend nicely and i told him that he shouldnt expect me to hang with him and his girl and like wise i wasnt gonna be mean to her when i did see her as long as she was nice to me. he understood that there were differences between his girl and myself and that way nothing ever went wrong and i never saw his girl and she never saw me and every one was happy.

there is always a way to work around situations like that, if you cant tell your friend then you will have to put up with girls bullshit. coz its just stupid to treat her like shit and your friend wont be happy about that.

i say be honest and tell the dude, but in a nice way, explain what your problem is, if he cant understand that then thats not your problem.

Posted by Ashley on Aug-04-2004 01:43:

Hmmm, well my "so called best friend" hated my boyfriend, for ABSOLUTELY no reason, she had only met him once. She told me that she didn't like him, and that he treated me like shit. But that WASN'T the case at all, my boyfrend treats me like a princess. It totally turned me off from being friends with her because I felt as though she wasn't respecting what was important to me. (My boyfriend)So after all that rambling, what I'm trying to say, is that if you do have a VERY good reason for disliking her, then maybe mention something to him about it, and tell him why you might not warm up to his girlfriend. On the the other hand, if it isn't a very good reason, and it might just be because they are hanging out a lot, then I would just let it go, like Durafei said, it might not be all his girlfriends fault.

Posted by Sly_Guy on Aug-04-2004 02:52:

There's nothing you can do really. One of my good friends is dating an absolute bitch, completely dominating him in every way, cheating on him, giving him double standards to live by [he's not allowed to drink, but she goes out and gets SMASHED every weekend], and basically taking away all his life outside of her. We've tried bringing him out, but he never can do it, bails on us and won't listen. You have to let it run it's course, cuz whoever it is will care about them no matter what you say. But the way I see it, you're in a better spot than me and my friends, as your friend is only dating some chick, while my buddy's engaged to this chick, and it's totally killing us.

Your situation may resolve itself, and hopefully for you it will, but for me, my friends have come up with a great plan. The wedding's gonna be in BC sometime next year, and we're gonna mission out in a van, hire some really disgusting women to hang off our arms, get really wasted and tell them to hit on everyone at the wedding. We're gonna get smashed, give speeches about all the 'good ol' drunken times' with our buddy and basically make one last desperate drunken attempt to break them up.

Well maybe we won't do that, but it's an entertianing thought.

Posted by Izra on Aug-04-2004 03:00:

From experience I would support your freind no matter who they are with. If they are really a bitch/asshole, your freind will eventually figure that out.

quote:
Originally posted by Ashley
Hmmm, well my "so called best friend" hated my boyfriend, for ABSOLUTELY no reason, she had only met him once. She told me that she didn't like him, and that he treated me like shit. But that WASN'T the case at all, my boyfrend treats me like a princess. It totally turned me off from being friends with her because I felt as though she wasn't respecting what was important to me. (My boyfriend)So after all that rambling, what I'm trying to say, is that if you do have a VERY good reason for disliking her, then maybe mention something to him about it, and tell him why you might not warm up to his girlfriend. On the the other hand, if it isn't a very good reason, and it might just be because they are hanging out a lot, then I would just let it go, like Durafei said, it might not be all his girlfriends fault.

OH Ash, I still can't believe this happened! Totally weird...

Posted by Allegory on Aug-04-2004 03:22:

I must say that if an entire group of friend finds someone that distasteful, something's not kosher. It's very reasonable not to gel with someone or be indifferent, and there are some whom are slow to warm. But if a whole group remarks the same thing, and if he is truly a close friend then it's your duty to be subtle, have a heart to heart and let him know how you feel; but don't impose your judgement- and use phrases like, 'I feel, or I suggest.' It's less obtrusive, and that way you won't lose a friendship; he'll just view it as you guys looking out for him. Whether he chooses to listen is his right, but at least you've expressed concern.

That's just my opinion

Posted by monishb on Aug-04-2004 03:55:

just move on , who cares, its non of your buisness anyhow.. its not like your going to marry her/him.

Posted by trancendental on Aug-04-2004 04:59:

Get a sex change

Posted by trancechaos on Aug-04-2004 05:59:

quote:
Originally posted by maxtuh
just move on , who cares, its non of your buisness anyhow.. its not like your going to marry her/him.

I understand what you are saying in this statement, but if its your friend you have to care.
i care alot for my friends, the guys that i call my close friends are almost like brothers to me, and its only fair to tell the people that are close to you how you feel about things that affect thier lives coz in a way it affects your life as well, not directly but it still does.

Pages (2): [1] 2 »