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how aids was invented

ok, so i'm going through some old CD-Rs and i find this disc of Phil Hendrie. This guy stages his own radio talk show on current events with a very humourous twist. so this one stuck out pretty well.

so the issue is the creation of aids. There is gay journalist who is trying to set things straight (no pun intended) about where it came from. he says aids should not be blamed on the gay community.
the worlds most powerful computers says aids came about in the 1930s in africa. the general theory is that monkeys orignally had aids and it was trasnfered to a human.
this guy was in africa and was away from his family for a very long time and needed to fulfill his sexual desire. AIDS is an std, so it had to have been transmitted trans-species, sexually. gays don't do this kind of crazy stuff, so it was a straight guy who put it in the mouth of a monkey.
the only explanation is that the monkey sucked his cock, and the transmission through a BITE. a sexually deprived guy who is building a highway in africa in the 1930s put it in the mouth of a monkey which bit him and transferred aids.
a lady calls in and tries to reason that it could have been transmitted by a monkey bite to a hunter. the journalist says that AIDs is an STD, so he says it may have been a hunter who killed a monkey, and then had sex with it.
so how did AIDs get into the gay community? well, the guy, who originally had a family, decided to get a little curious about gay sex.

lets reason:
go to the zoo. who do u see around the monkey cages? families. men with familes. who are straight. so that means that straight men have a liking to monkeys.


sleepy

the one about shooting the easter bunny is pretty funny too. it's a 911 call where a guy says someone is trying to invade his home, so he blows the head off of the intruder, who is the easter bunny

you are forgetting that you can get AIDs without having sex with the host. any transfusion of bodily fluids is a risk, he may have chopped up an AIDs infected monkey with a cut on his hand.

end of theory

Re: how aids was invented

quote:

Originally posted by nialsjd the one about shooting the easter bunny is pretty funny too. it's a 911 call where a guy says someone is trying to invade his home, so he blows the head off of the intruder, who is the easter bunny

I think this is the only thing in your entire post that made sense to me.

Well it's possible that the guy had sex with the monkey but it's most likely that the disease was transferred to him by some other means. People don't exactly get mad cow disease by humping cows now do they?

:gaysmilie:

That is the single stupidest thing I've read in my entire life.

quote:

Originally posted by tranceDJ People don't exactly get mad cow disease by humping cows now do they?

no because you can't get vCJD from being intimate with an infected animal

you have to eat brain/nerve tissue

quote:

Originally posted by tu_face no because you can't get vCJD from being intimate with an infected animal you have to eat brain/nerve tissue

GOOD LORD

quote:

Originally posted by DarkAngel GOOD LORD

yes, dear?

quote:

Originally posted by Echo of Silence yes, dear?

LOL

Forget AIDS, who invented the common cold?

quote:

Originally posted by Arbiter Forget AIDS, who invented the common cold?

alright, alright already! i confess, it was me.

i like how that argument says that you get aids from sexual activity, but then says it bit the dudes dick and that's how he got it

hehe

Re: how aids was invented

quote:

Originally posted by nialsjd gays don't do this kind of crazy stuff so that means that straight men have a liking to monkeys.

wrong and wrong

i mean...no gay man has ever been caught with a gerbel in his ass...never!

quote:

Originally posted by Floorfiller i mean...no gay man has ever been caught with a gerbel in his ass...never!

Thats what you think

quote:

Originally posted by TweeK Thats what you think

i was being sarcastic!

i remember when you had to go to the emergency room hahaha

quote:

Originally posted by Floorfiller i was being sarcastic! i remember when you had to go to the emergency room hahaha

ssshhhh

Dude never know there some weird porn out there?Not that i know of course

quote:

Originally posted by Floorfiller i like how that argument says that you get aids from sexual activity, but then says it bit the dudes dick and that's how he got it

you don't believe oral sex with a mokney counts as normal sexual activity?

quote:

Originally posted by nialsjd you don't believe oral sex with a mokney counts as normal sexual activity?

that's not the point. the point is that sexual activity would suggest that there was a fluid transfer like the dude ejaculates in the monkeys mouth, but if he was bit then he could in theory be bit anywhere and still contract it.

quote:

Originally posted by Floorfiller that's not the point. the point is that sexual activity would suggest that there was a fluid transfer like the dude ejaculates in the monkeys mouth, but if he was bit then he could in theory be bit anywhere and still contract it.

This is probably overly graphic, but if the monkey was giving the guy oral sex, the hole in his penis could probably have easily been pulled open by the action, depositing the monkey's saliva into the penis, thus a transfer of fluids. You can possibly assume that the virus would have been ejected upon ejaculation, but depending on the time in between, it is also likely that the virus began to take root. Unlike a woman, who must wait for either pre-cum ( I forget the name for this), or a man's natural lubrication (secreted from small bumps at the base of the penis) to enter her, a man is succeptible upon insertion and withdrawl.

quote:

Originally posted by tribu This is probably overly graphic, but if the monkey was giving the guy oral sex, the hole in his penis could probably have easily been pulled open by the action, depositing the monkey's saliva into the penis, thus a transfer of fluids. You can possibly assume that the virus would have been ejected upon ejaculation, but depending on the time in between, it is also likely that the virus began to take root. Unlike a woman, who must wait for either pre-cum ( I forget the name for this), or a man's natural lubrication (secreted from small bumps at the base of the penis) to enter her, a man is succeptible upon insertion and withdrawl.

you're right...that was overally graphic HHAHAHAHA...


but informative

Re: how aids was invented

quote:

Originally posted by nialsjd lets reason: go to the zoo. who do u see around the monkey cages? families. men with familes. who are straight. so that means that straight men have a liking to monkeys.

lol.. there are plenty of men with families that are gay. the governer of new jerey for example. dont believe what you see. believe what you experience.

nothin beats reading a story about dudes and ejaculation and monkeys while eating lunch at work!

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