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-- New EU Language!

Posted by nycionx on Feb-19-2005 19:22:

New EU Language!

this is great!

----
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
Will be the official language of the European Union rather than German,
Which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft c". Sertainly, this will
Make sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expected to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e"
in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining
"ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.

Ze drem of a united Europ vil finali kum tru. If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. Zen ve vil rul ze vorld!!!

Posted by Jayx1 on Feb-19-2005 19:26:

So in other words they are just making text message shorthand legit?

LOL

Sadly that looks like a lot of the spelling that i witness on these messageboards!

Posted by DigiNut on Feb-19-2005 19:28:

That is pure gold.

Posted by VERTiG0 on Feb-19-2005 19:28:

I think you totally missed the point, Jayx1. It flew way over your head

That is truly awesome, from German back to German. :laffo:

Posted by Jem_hadar on Feb-19-2005 19:32:

Posted by Jayx1 on Feb-19-2005 19:39:

quote:
Originally posted by VERTiG0
I think you totally missed the point, Jayx1. It flew way over your head

That is truly awesome, from German back to German. :laffo:

No i got the point... i just added my own

Posted by MarkT on Feb-19-2005 19:43:

quote:
Originally posted by DigiNut
That is pure gold.

Posted by fastmp3 on Feb-19-2005 19:47:

reminds me of the sms language

Posted by ShadoWolf on Feb-19-2005 20:17:

Re: New EU Language!

quote:
Originally posted by nycionx

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English
Will be the official language of the European Union

The French would never allow that.

Full stop!

Posted by DJ_Elyot on Feb-19-2005 21:17:

That is genius. Really really funny.

Posted by TeMPo.fLUx on Feb-19-2005 21:34:

Re: New EU Language!

quote:
Originally posted by nycionx
Ze drem of a united Europ vil finali kum tru. If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. Zen ve vil rul ze vorld!!!

lol.. that reminds me of Yvon of the Yukon..

Posted by TrueToTheCrew on Feb-19-2005 22:31:

Re: Re: New EU Language!

quote:
Originally posted by ShadoWolf
The French would never allow that.

Full stop!

SO the French will complain and the EU will have 2 official languages. All signs will have french / english where only 10% of the population can read french.

Sound familiar.

Posted by Jayx1 on Feb-19-2005 23:00:

Re: Re: Re: New EU Language!

Posted by St_Andrew on Feb-20-2005 06:27:

Re: Re: Re: New EU Language!

quote:
Originally posted by TrueToTheCrew
SO the French will complain and the EU will have 2 official languages. All signs will have french / english where only 10% of the population can read french.

Sound familiar.

lol

so true, canada and the EU have similair problems. the french ppl are actually putting in LOTS of money into the EU promoting french as a eu language (english, french and german are official languages in the EU parliament)... but nowadays like 90% of all the stuff is written in english... so the french are of course fighting for their fucking stupid language that should be dead by now...

Posted by DJ_Elyot on Feb-20-2005 16:28:

At least it's not like Canadian French, which is 50% English anyway.