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-- I managed to punch myself in the junk. And it hurt.
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I managed to punch myself in the junk. And it hurt.
I was pulling a package of cookies out of the cupboard, and it slipped out of my hand. I have pretty quick reflexes, so on an impulse I made the swipe to catch it before it hit the ground.
I missed the bag... and punched myself in the bag instead. You have no idea how much it hurts to punch yourself in the junk. I hit the floor, holding my own cookies while laying in a pile of broken ones.
My mother, who saw the whole thing from the living room, laughed her ass off for a good five minutes.
haha 
I sat on my own nuts once when I forgot to wear my codpiece. They hang extremely low when unconstrained, you see.
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Aiwendil I sat on my own nuts once when I forgot to wear my codpiece. They hang extremely low when unconstrained, you see. |
lol, nice going punisher.,... it's god's way of punishing you for having too low prices on your work :P
speaking of punching yourself in the nuts......
One night i was extremely high with one of my pals. We just came back from smoking in the university's theatre.
so it's midnight, we're walking back to our dorms. We go up this trail that cuts through the woods and we see some one.
So my friend starts to get paranoid. "omg, some one is coming. Im so high!!!!"
and im like "chill man, just act normal"
so i decided to act completely abnormal once i said that.
I started doing this weird windmill walk, flailing my arms in circles whilst sayin "actin normal.....oh yeah...actin normal"
and as the dude is approaching us, one of my windmill motions got a little too close to my balls, in fact, i decked myself right in the sack.
so i fall to the floor in pain and scream
"NOT NORMAL!!!!!"
while my friend starts to jog quickly away from me sayin "normal normal normal" and im lying on the floor screaming for help.
meanwhile, this dude is completely freakin out, and jets.
good times in college 
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Aiwendil I sat on my own nuts once when I forgot to wear my codpiece. They hang extremely low when unconstrained, you see. |
I remember nailing myself in the whangdoodle with a hockey stick when I was playing ball hockey - I was going towards the opposition goal and I stopped, but unfortunately, the stick I was using wasn't as smooth as it could have been (on the blade, and it stopped too... even though I was wearing a cup, it still hurt. 
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Mr. Pink speaking of punching yourself in the nuts...... One night i was extremely high with one of my pals. We just came back from smoking in the university's theatre. so it's midnight, we're walking back to our dorms. We go up this trail that cuts through the woods and we see some one. So my friend starts to get paranoid. "omg, some one is coming. Im so high!!!!" and im like "chill man, just act normal" so i decided to act completely abnormal once i said that. I started doing this weird windmill walk, flailing my arms in circles whilst sayin "actin normal.....oh yeah...actin normal" and as the dude is approaching us, one of my windmill motions got a little too close to my balls, in fact, i decked myself right in the sack. so i fall to the floor in pain and scream "NOT NORMAL!!!!!" while my friend starts to jog quickly away from me sayin "normal normal normal" and im lying on the floor screaming for help. meanwhile, this dude is completely freakin out, and jets. good times in college |
(except for actually hitting himself)
i've only been in 3 fights in my life.
one was recent, but im not counting it cuz i totally whooped his ass lmao (im not even bragging here, 99% of the nerds on TA could take me on)
and the other 2........i was hit in the balls and went into a rage. both times they were my friends lol, but i couldnt help myself. I unleashed the puerto rican fury!
^Ouch 
Oddly enough, in the one full-on fight I've ever got into (which lasted about 15 seconds before the guy I fought with had me in a headlock to calm me down - he didn't want to hurt me), I never got nailed south of the border.
I've sacked myself numerous times just from sitting down funny. Not fun. 
@ Nou - bloody hell, what is with peeps these days? Trying to push you out the door when you were on the ground writhing in agony? Sounds like some of the stuff some of the Grade 9s (when I graduated from HS 4 years ago) would have done. Well, to me, anyhow.
have you ever played hack and while attempting to hit the hack whap your balls against your leg? so when you hit it up it goes SMACK
this isn't myself punching myself in the junk, but i shoulda seen it comin...
my girlfriend in like...10th grade, complete bitch. 
anyway, she leads me out of the classroom one day during a free period. Sometimes we used to go do da stuff upstairs..so i'm thinking..alright, cool. little poontang for me.
Note: She's been pissed at me for some reason for the past couple days...really unhappy with me.
she takes me out to the lockers, bends own in front of me, reaches for the member, all seductive like looking up at me. I'm thinking hey, never to early to get started, right? i look away, and as soon as i do, she cranks one from eye level straight at my balls. Direct hit!! I double over astonished, completely not what I was expecting, and I look up as she walks off back to the class room. Yeah...we didn't last too long.
I still don't trust women getting down on their knees in front of me. 
bitch
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Mr. Pink speaking of punching yourself in the nuts...... One night i was extremely high with one of my pals. We just came back from smoking in the university's theatre. so it's midnight, we're walking back to our dorms. We go up this trail that cuts through the woods and we see some one. So my friend starts to get paranoid. "omg, some one is coming. Im so high!!!!" and im like "chill man, just act normal" so i decided to act completely abnormal once i said that. I started doing this weird windmill walk, flailing my arms in circles whilst sayin "actin normal.....oh yeah...actin normal" and as the dude is approaching us, one of my windmill motions got a little too close to my balls, in fact, i decked myself right in the sack. so i fall to the floor in pain and scream "NOT NORMAL!!!!!" while my friend starts to jog quickly away from me sayin "normal normal normal" and im lying on the floor screaming for help. meanwhile, this dude is completely freakin out, and jets. good times in college |
Dude....OUCH.
http://movies.collegehumor.com/medi...s/dog_bites.wmv
aaahhh.. being young is so fun.
btw excellent stories guys. lol
| quote: |
| Originally posted by astroboy http://movies.collegehumor.com/medi...s/dog_bites.wmv |
| quote: |
| Originally posted by astroboy http://movies.collegehumor.com/medi...s/dog_bites.wmv |
hilarious video@
| quote: |
| Originally posted by astroboy http://movies.collegehumor.com/medi...s/dog_bites.wmv |
| quote: |
| Originally posted by apostrophe Stupid lil' mutt. Throw him off a bridge. |
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Mr. Pink I started doing this weird windmill walk, flailing my arms in circles whilst sayin "actin normal.....oh yeah...actin normal" while my friend starts to jog quickly away from me sayin "normal normal normal" and im lying on the floor screaming for help. |
Ive never hit myself in the nuts, but ive zipped myself up if you know what I mean.
easily the worst (physical) feeling of my life...
| quote: |
| Originally posted by tribu Ive never hit myself in the nuts, but ive zipped myself up if you know what I mean. easily the worst (physical) feeling of my life... |
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