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Posted by Spike on Aug-05-2005 03:12:

how do you cope with.....

a VERY coservative/super right wing/tightassed/CONTROL FREEEEEeeeeeeeEEEEEEAAAAAAK of a father!?! ARGHHHHGHGh

he drives me nuts really....im 20 yrs old. my old man has always been like this and will never change. but he still gets me sometimes, making snide little comments here n there whenever i see him (mind you for only brief moments a day) n it just irritates the hell outta me. im old enough now to know that his iron grip on my life has seriously altered my psychology and all my relationships with my peers, aquantances n so on

this past year ive made a huge commitment to change myself, change my life for the better so i do not end up like him. i repeat, DO NOT end up like him!

my confidence used to be very very low in the past and i was just so damn sheltered and naive. usuallly depressed and confused most the time. but now i can confidently say (no pun intended) that my life has vastly improved and my overall happiness as a person is far greater than what it was just 6 months ago....soooooooo yeah, just needed to vent that out. all better now!

Posted by apostrophe on Aug-05-2005 03:17:

Respect his ideas, as an adult. And ask him to respect yours. Agree to disagree.

Posted by Sunsnail on Aug-05-2005 03:17:

*golf clap*

Posted by {b.s.e.} on Aug-05-2005 03:18:

kill your father and marry your mother. it's the only way out.

Posted by Spike on Aug-05-2005 03:23:

quote:
Originally posted by {b.s.e.}
kill your father

the thought had actually crossed my mind

Posted by {b.s.e.} on Aug-05-2005 03:33:

quote:
Originally posted by Spike
the thought had actually crossed my mind

If I were you, I'd read the first half of Edgar Allen Poe's The Tell Tale heart. Don't worry about the second half, it's not important.

Posted by Arbiter on Aug-05-2005 04:05:

Ignore him.

Posted by {b.s.e.} on Aug-05-2005 04:07:

quote:
Originally posted by Arbiter
Ignore him.

stop confusing him.

Posted by Arbiter on Aug-05-2005 04:08:

quote:
Originally posted by {b.s.e.}
stop confusing him.

Good point, that would be way too complicated. Murder it is.

Posted by Spike on Aug-05-2005 16:25:

bump* thx for the advive guys!

Posted by Boomer187 on Aug-05-2005 16:42:

dude your 20. Get a job or some money and move the funk out

Posted by Aquarian on Aug-05-2005 17:12:

move out, stop talking to him

Posted by euphoria on Aug-05-2005 17:29:

Kill em with kindness. It actualy works in some cases and I can attest to that.

Its going to take much mental control on your part since you probably dislike him alot but his reactions will be quite amusing and will work in your favor.

Like for example he makes a snide comment. You say...you know what I have never looked at it from that persepctive before. Thank you for enlightening me.

There are appropriate responses to every nasty thing he may say....give some exaples and I will help you respond.

By the time its over he will think you are either a very nice person or an absolute sarcastic smart ass. Either way since he will notice his actions dont irritate you anymore or at least they dont seem to he will either back off because he is expecting a rise out of you or you guys will end up having one of those fake relationships where they hate is there but you are both smiling.

Posted by Spike on Aug-06-2005 05:16:

quote:
Originally posted by ZzZ The Goddess
Kill em with kindness. It actualy works in some cases and I can attest to that.

Its going to take much mental control on your part since you probably dislike him alot but his reactions will be quite amusing and will work in your favor.

Like for example he makes a snide comment. You say...you know what I have never looked at it from that persepctive before. Thank you for enlightening me.

There are appropriate responses to every nasty thing he may say....give some exaples and I will help you respond.

By the time its over he will think you are either a very nice person or an absolute sarcastic smart ass. Either way since he will notice his actions dont irritate you anymore or at least they dont seem to he will either back off because he is expecting a rise out of you or you guys will end up having one of those fake relationships where they hate is there but you are both smiling.

well if im at the computer for example...he will come out from nowhere (literally) and lurk over my shoulder - trying to get a glimpse at what im doing/looking at. it annoys the fuck outta me, n then he'll say in a really nosey way, "whaaaaaaaats that you're looking at?!"...then he'll go on about how there are virus everywhere and he desnt want me screwing around with the computer and anti-virus settings....like WTF!?!?

or if one of my girlfriends(not actually my girlfriend but just a girl who is my friend) come by the house and goes into my room or right befroe i leave to go out with them, he'll catch me before i leave the door and interrogate me on where im going, who im going with....and then when he finds out its a girl im going out with he lectures me saying,; "dont screw around or do anything stupid" URGHHHH fuckin hell! his voice literally cuts like a knife and i cANT talk to him at all. no matter what he's always RIGHT!

Posted by Spike on Aug-06-2005 05:17:

Posted by Emil on Aug-06-2005 05:17:

quote:
Originally posted by Boomer187
dude your 20. Get a job or some money and move the funk out

What he said.

Posted by Spike on Aug-06-2005 05:26:

quote:
Originally posted by Emil
What he said.

hahahaha what do you think ive been planning for the last 12 years???!?! im still in school...taking classical animation then computer than i will be taking gaming which i will land a job at a video game company doin concept art, or modeling or whatever. it is incredibly hard, but im working my ass off and it will pay off in the end. once i land a full time job thats it. adios fuck off pops, have a nice life!!!

Posted by Emil on Aug-06-2005 05:30:

Then I suggest you cowboy the fuck up and tell your dad to stop being a wanker.

Posted by est on Aug-06-2005 11:27:

I'm 25 - Here's a typical conversation between me and my father/mother:

Me: I'm going out tonight
Dad: Are you? Well don't come home with any strange men...
Me: You know what - that's exactly what I was going to do, but now that you've told me not to, I won't do it.

(I then proceed to get drunk and go to a strange man's flat .)

Posted by Axolotyl on Aug-06-2005 11:33:

My mother was a real pain in the ass and I could never get along with her until I'd grown up and moved out. After a lot of frustration, I learned how to deal with it. Best advide I can give you... treat them like a child themselves. Try snooping around and seeing what he's doing, and question him about his choices. Offer him your take on things and correct him when he's wrong. Avoiding the situation is only going to frustrate him. If you engage him on his level then you mjight get through to him.

This will do two things

1. Take back some of the power for yourself and in turn leave you feeling less frustrated

2. Make him realise how it feels for you when he does that shit

Sorta worked for me