Ok U've just used the toilet & theres no toilet paper...now what :p

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-- Ok U've just used the toilet & theres no toilet paper...now what :p
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Posted by Coup on Jan-22-2002 21:54:

Ok U've just used the toilet & theres no toilet paper...now what :p

ok, firstly this topic isnt going to be the nicest so if u wish to complain about the vulgarity of this thread, don't, go phone up ur isp and comaplain to them instead about something else.

i was around my mates house and went to the toilet, and had a shit, and i went to wipe my arse and to my "oh shit" tone of voice there was no toilet paper, im sure i aint the only one to expirence this, so just wondered what others have done? i was looking for paper or alternatives, moving my head more times a second that a pigeon, and then realised that there was nowt, but then found some baby wipes so i was ok that time, i had a backup plan which is very foul but ill let u use ur imagination about that

so just wondered what others have done in this situation?

(ps-yes i no this is a foul topic, but its all for fun, so dont reply with some shitty () comment plz.

Posted by TranceGiant on Jan-22-2002 22:01:

I have something that has a little bit to do with your subject.
The unability of using PUBLIC toilet. There was a period were this complex of mine got outta control and i just couldnt do anything anymore. I almost exlploded when we had excursions from school for example. Nowadays i just need my concentration, meaning that i cnat stand ppl talking behind me, hearing ANY noise or just feeling that some1 MIGHT enter and disturb..yeah im paranoide

lets make this the "toilet stories" thread

Posted by Spad on Jan-22-2002 22:10:

Well mate do what I did in Thailand (they have no bog roll coz the drainage system can't handle it). Use what mother nature gave you...

Posted by Ruben_Dubbink on Jan-22-2002 22:16:

do the same thing as in the commercial (on Dutch TV)

use the tissue you girlfriend threw out of the window of a driving train when she left for a long time...........(or don't use it , it's your choice)

GreetZ RubDub

Posted by Dmatrox on Jan-22-2002 22:54:

I always check for the tiolet paper first...

Posted by Gekhous on Jan-22-2002 22:55:

quote:
Originally posted by Spad
Well mate do what I did in Thailand (they have no bog roll coz the drainage system can't handle it). Use what mother nature gave you...

aaaawww man!!!! yuk!!!!

the evil doll in ur avatar looks like he is actually doing it RIGHT NOW!!!

Posted by Spad on Jan-22-2002 23:14:

quote:
Originally posted by Gekhous

aaaawww man!!!! yuk!!!!

the evil doll in ur avatar looks like he is actually doing it RIGHT NOW!!!

Option 1: Spend 5 weeks in own beach hut (including hammock) that costs less per night than a Big Max does back home on tropical island that hosts techno/trance beach parties every other weekend by night.
Option 2: Go home coz I need a shit.

Hrm...tough choice.
Anyway the diet helps, doesn't leave much to clean up if you see what I mean. A lot of people take bog roll with them then just dump it somewhere but if you ask me that's just disrepectful.

Posted by jon on Jan-22-2002 23:19:

Imm used to this, living in a student house imm the only one that ever buys bog roll, now ive got my own secret suply of the stuff!

Jon

Posted by DJ Sarah H on Jan-22-2002 23:19:

quote:
Originally posted by Dmatrox
I always check for the tiolet paper first...

Werd !

Coup: What a shitty subject to talk about (PUN intended)

The Army way of wiping your arse ...

Take ONE square of toilet paper
fold it into 4
then tear out the middle part, the centre of the square where it has that nice sharp edge, next place the unfolded paper over your middle finger, see why u tore out the middle part now ?
Important ! keep the part u tore out ! !

next insert middle finger into your bottom to clean your arse, remove and use paper to clean your finger.
Discard used paper and then use the bit u tore out to clean under your fingernail. (told u that was important to keep)

That was the way the British Army trained ppl to wipe their arse out in the field . . .

Posted by Dj O'Callaghan on Jan-22-2002 23:27:

Thats minging Neo lol, and Coup this threads is a shitty topic to talk about lol. Spad thats dangerous with all the snakes and spiders out there lol.

Newspaper thats what I would use if I ran out of bog roll lol which is very rare as we usually have about 20 rolls of toliet roll in our house, empty every last piece of shit out of your system then use some newspaper lol, sounds disgusting also have a bath or shower afterwards cos the ink must smudge, also another tip find someone you hate in the newspaper and use their picture as bog roll.

Posted by SYNthSRI on Jan-23-2002 00:13:

w3rd!

In this lil house-o-mine, there's a spare roll right above in the cabinet just in case of those instances!

Posted by Spad on Jan-23-2002 00:27:

School toilet paper was the best. It was all shiney and slippery. You'd begin to wipe your arse and before you knew it your hand would be half way up your back.

Posted by Vivid Boy on Jan-23-2002 00:41:

do what i do...just walk out of the washroom with ur pants around ur ankles and ask ur friends mom if she has any toilet paper left...

Posted by tranceDJ on Jan-23-2002 06:55:

quote:
Originally posted by Vivid Boy
do what i do...just walk out of the washroom with ur pants around ur ankles and ask ur friends mom if she has any toilet paper left...

LOL!!! I hope thats not true

Posted by elena on Jan-23-2002 06:58:

notice only the men replying heh
well girls usually have a lil bundle of kleenex in their purses so ya..hurray for the chics..

Posted by ABTsportsline on Jan-23-2002 07:04:

quote:
Originally posted by miss_e
notice only the men replying heh
well girls usually have a lil bundle of kleenex in their purses so ya..hurray for the chics..

Yah i always keep kleenex in my pu..... er.... i mean, yeah that sucks when you run out of TP!!

-ABT-

Posted by Coup on Jan-23-2002 07:52:

quote:
Originally posted by Spad
School toilet paper was the best. It was all shiney and slippery. You'd begin to wipe your arse and before you knew it your hand would be half way up your back.

haha! or it used to be the stuff they chipped away from the cliffs of dover and it felt like using sandpaper! i always check for paper, but sometimes u just have to go and u dont check, fortuanly i was saved by a tub of babywipes, but if they wernt there, army training would have been cracked open

Posted by Fraggle on Jan-23-2002 08:15:

hahahahaah, that was pretty lucky coup!

damn, i can't imagine how gross it is in army training

...btw, yeah always check first

Posted by Vivid Boy on Jan-23-2002 16:00:

quote:
Originally posted by miss_e
notice only the men replying heh
well girls usually have a lil bundle of kleenex in their purses so ya..hurray for the chics..

ya i usually have a bundle of kleenex stuffed in my crouch.....makes it look bigger

Posted by flystyler on Jan-23-2002 16:07:

I suppose you could always do it like the dog in the thread in the uk forum, stick your legs up in the air and drag your arse along the flor with your arms lol

Posted by j_spot on Jan-23-2002 17:27:

who says you need a wipe???

tho I would always check under the sink..there are usually goodies under that...kleenex, TP whateva..but for instances in teh woods w/out TP..pine needles. Really..since u dont wanna use leaves cuz not everyone knows what poison Ivy looks like, find a live sprig of pine needles, and rub with the grain. It kinda tickles, but if ya do it the wrong way..you will be in for quite a treat.

oh..and never use moss...little nasty bugs n shit live in moss..they climb into your anus, and ya u get the picture

PINE NEEDLES!

Posted by dj_mdma on Jan-23-2002 18:57:

Posted by Tony Morello on Jan-23-2002 20:04:

quote:
Originally posted by j_spot
who says you need a wipe???

tho I would always check under the sink..there are usually goodies under that...kleenex, TP whateva..but for instances in teh woods w/out TP..pine needles. Really..since u dont wanna use leaves cuz not everyone knows what poison Ivy looks like, find a live sprig of pine needles, and rub with the grain. It kinda tickles, but if ya do it the wrong way..you will be in for quite a treat.

oh..and never use moss...little nasty bugs n shit live in moss..they climb into your anus, and ya u get the picture

PINE NEEDLES!

That's what you were doing when we were camping...

Posted by Dmatrox on Jan-23-2002 20:13:

Posted by Ur Dream Grl on Jan-24-2002 03:26:

quote:
Originally posted by flystyler
I suppose you could always do it like the dog in the thread in the uk forum, stick your legs up in the air and drag your arse along the flor with your arms lol

DAWMMMMMMMMMMM...hey fly.. can u post the picture here.. plisssssssss

hehehheheheh

but anyways if i had that problem...which i doubt i would ever have cause i dont go shitting in other ppls bathrooms.. hehehe

and i always check to see if there s toilet paper.. and if not... i ll ask the person that lives in the house for some.. and since i am girl and that makes me have the privilege of getting away with that whole wipping story... they wont ever know if i went #1 or #2 (in proper words... SHITTING OR PEEING)

NOW HOW DO U LIKE THAT???
heheheheh
xoxo Ur Dream Grl

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