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-- The Slutmonkey Thread Paur Deux

The Slutmonkey Thread Paur Deux

FAQ: RECOGNIZING AND DEALING WITH THE SLUTMONKEYS IN YOUR LIFE
a practical guide by d!abolic



1. WHAT IS A SLUTMONKEY?

According to Urban Dictionary, a slutmonkey is:

A slut who jumps from dick to dick like a monkey jumps to branches.

"Damn, that slut monkey gave my WHOLE fuckin' crew AIDS. Shiiieet."


2. WHAT ARE THE SURE-FIRE WAYS TO RECOGNIZE A SLUTMONKEY?

1. Micro-micro-skirt, also known as the "you can still see EVERYTHING, but at least i can say that i'm wearing SOMETHING skirt."
2. Tits that account for more than 15% of total body weight (see below).
3. Total body weight under 100lbs, thanks years on the "eat nothing, drink everything diet."
4. A tanning salon bill that is equal to or larger than the rent bill.
5. She's almost half a foot shorter than you, but towers over you when she puts on her heels.
6. A small, single-file procession of black guys following her wherever she goes (and yes, she lets them take turns).
7. hername.mpg is always the first file that comes up when you search your favorite P2P network for "whore"
8. She thinks Madonna is a prude and should loosen up (pun intended) a bit
9. When she walks into a the local drug store, they ask if she'd like "the usual" and hand her a morning after pill.
10. She doesn't mind if you sleep with her best friend. In fact, she insists on it because she's already slept with eight of yours.


3. HOW DO I DEAL WITH SLUTMONKEYS?

Dealing with slutmonkeys is simple, as they always want the same thing you do (if you're a guy or a bisexual girl anyway). Simply ensure that you have the Three Essentials present with you at all times (home, car, etc):

1. Alcohol
2. Condoms
3. Paper towel

Note that if you choose to skip #2, add "blank cheque for child support" to #4.

ok

Holy shit, that 350 owns mine I was half-expecting it to explode and kill everyone!

quote:

Originally posted by d!abolic Holy shit, that 350 owns mine I was half-expecting it to explode and kill everyone!

It is awesome because it has a Mazda engine in it and not that raucous Japanese/French abomination

My rustbucket E30 also makes a lot of noise when I rev it. Numbers, man, I need numbers.

Your rustbucket E30 doesn't have a Mazda 20B triple-rotor 2.0L pushing 550hp to the rear wheels though

quote:

Originally posted by VERTiG0 Your rustbucket E30 doesn't have a Mazda 20B triple-rotor 2.0L pushing 550hp to the rear wheels though

That's all I wanted.

P.S. Why would anyone rip a rotary out of an RX-7?

quote:

Originally posted by Cosmic Fur That's all I wanted. P.S. Why would anyone rip a rotary out of an RX-7?

That rotary didn't come from an RX7.

It came from this:




Also, obligatory LOL ROTARIES, BOOST IN, APEX SEALS OUT, LOL ROTARIES

wtf?

What a smooth hijack, I love it.

Rotary engines are the work of the devil.

quote:

Originally posted by cyper Buttsex?

quote:

Originally posted by Stingray Rotary engines are the work of the devil.

what makes them so difficult? i was told that you must let the engine run a little while before driving away. if not, it could reduce the life of the engine. true or false?

quote:

Originally posted by Tordan what makes them so difficult? i was told that you must let the engine run a little while before driving away. if not, it could reduce the life of the engine. true or false?

Jeez I do that with any engine.


From what I understand, they wear out very fast and require alot of maintenence. Also, do get any decent speed out of them, you have to drive the vehicle really hard because they dont develop any serious power until they are in the very high RPMs.

I've also read a few reports of RX-8's burning more oil than gas.



Cale, input please.

quote:

Originally posted by PartEgurl What a smooth hijack, I love it.

That's my Cale

quote:

Originally posted by Cosmic Fur My rustbucket E30 also makes a lot of noise when I rev it. Numbers, man, I need numbers.

get a valve adjustment and check your injectors...theres your ticking noises. i need to get my valves adjusted because of the tick.

quote:

Originally posted by Stingray Jeez I do that with any engine. From what I understand, they wear out very fast and require alot of maintenence. Also, do get any decent speed out of them, you have to drive the vehicle really hard because they dont develop any serious power until they are in the very high RPMs. I've also read a few reports of RX-8's burning more oil than gas. Cale, input please.

I'l try to field this one:

Their major downfall is the fact that the seals are much more complex, and fail much more easily. That is the #1 problem with all rotaries - blowing the seals. Also, traditionally rotaries get rather poor mileage, but that is if you compare a 1.3L rotary to a 1.3L piston - the rotary will burn more gas than the piston, however, at the same time the rotary will produce something like 200 ponies, and the piston engine will sputter out only about 80. So if you compare mileage based on power output, it's not any worse than a piston engine. The new Renesis rotary engine in the RX-8 is supposed to eliminate almost all the problems inherent in the rotary engine.

Your point on driving it hard is only half true. One, since a rotary has a lot less moving parts and no reciprocating stuff like crankshafts, camshafts, valves, or valve trains. That makes the engine much smoother to rev, and they are able to achieve more power at higher rpms. At the same time, since one rotor contains 3 chambers, a rotary running at 3000 rpm is actually spinning at 1/3 the speed of a piston engine running at 3000 rpm.

quote:

Originally posted by King Luis get a valve adjustment and check your injectors...theres your ticking noises. i need to get my valves adjusted because of the tick.

lol, no, what I meant is my muffler's rusted through so it makes a shitload of noise. No ticking noises as far as I can tell. I don't care either way - the car has 369,000kms and it's just a handmedown from my dad until i buy something better. There's no way in hell I'm gonna start throwing money at it now, because once I start there'lll be no end to all the things that need fixing. She runs for now (the fuel pump seizes from time to time), and that's all that matters to me.

quote:

Originally posted by *~LiSa-LoO~* That's my Cale

awwww....l'amoure du sketch

quote:

Originally posted by 5hiftn6ears awwww....l'amoure du sketch

pure brilliance.

Normally aspirated rotaries (like the 12A and 13B non-turbo) will last just as long, if not longer than any reliable piston engine.

And yes they do consume a lot of oil, because by design the oil is used to lubricate the apex seals.

The only reason that people fuck up rotaries is because they don't know how to take care of them. You can't overheat them, they have 3 temperature settings: Cold, normal, blown fucking engine. You can't drive them around the block for a 15 second drive after starting cold. Change the fucking oil ever 4-5000km.

A rotary with a streetport or bridgeport has the best goddamn noise ever at 9000rpm.

BRAP BRAP BRAP BRAP BRAP BRAP BRAP oh yes

quote:

Originally posted by 5hiftn6ears awwww....l'amoure du sketch

I'll l'amoure your sketch

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