So the American audience got a little education on the Premership...

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-- So the American audience got a little education on the Premership...

Posted by verndogs on Jul-23-2006 03:53:

So the American audience got a little education on the Premership...

I don't know how many of you read Page 2 (the humor section) on ESPN, but Bill Simmons, one of the more popular writers talked about how he picked his team to follow for the upcoming Premiership season:

Part 1:

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page...=simmons/060719

Part 2:

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page...immons/060719_2

Posted by King Ecnal on Jul-23-2006 05:45:

yeah my friend was like, whoa, maybe EPL is cool, cause everyone around here worhips simmons, I don't think he's anything special..

Posted by verndogs on Jul-23-2006 05:55:

quote:
Originally posted by King Ecnal
yeah my friend was like, whoa, maybe EPL is cool, cause everyone around here worhips simmons, I don't think he's anything special..

simmons was better when he was doing his stint on digital cities cuz he got away with lot more

many of us old school readers (I've been reading him since 1999) will never forget his best piece of work...the "I hate Bob Costas" page

Posted by drufrumvancity on Jul-23-2006 10:56:

he picked a classy team lol my favorite outta the epl

SPURS FOR 4TH PLACE THIS YEAR!

Posted by zoric on Jul-23-2006 11:02:

I've never been a bigger fan of the EPL, but I've always liked Tottenham and Fulham. I'm going with them this year again.

Posted by drufrumvancity on Jul-23-2006 11:04:

i always knew u were classy zoran

Posted by zoric on Jul-23-2006 11:26:

quote:
Originally posted by drufrumvancity
i always knew u were classy zoran

Posted by Ian on Jul-23-2006 11:41:

fuck spurs. nuff said

Posted by zoric on Jul-23-2006 11:47:

Mr. Bolton

Posted by Ian on Jul-23-2006 12:49:

quote:
Originally posted by zoric
Mr. Bolton

they're hypocrites! They always complain about chelski, yet they've signed loads of players in the last 3 years, many of whom have got little to no chance of playing & been moved on. It's sickening watching teams trying to buy their way into everything. The odd big money signing, fair enough, but they make way too many. Pompey are the same now gaydamak is in charge.

Posted by noikeee on Jul-23-2006 13:58:

Tottenham looks like a very dull team to me.

Chelsea until Mourinho, Ricardo Carvalho and Paulo Ferreira all leave, then Arsenal like always before.

Posted by Xavier on Jul-23-2006 14:00:

read the article earlier in the week and just laughed. Lol yanks.

Anyways...

A NORTH AMERICAN MATCH SUMMARY OF THE CLASSIC LIVERPOOL VS NEWCASTLE 4-3 MATCH

A four-three powerplay from Team LFC saw Newcastle bested and the Liverbirds elevated by 3 points in the premier league stat table this week.
Stanley Collymore's 15 yard cross field-play upfielded for Robert Fowler to put through the scorebag on his head before many of the anfield red stars fans had finished their pre match chilli cheese fries.

David James's blanking left Newcastle facing a negative score-stat scenario and a possible close-out on the road.

It's a score levelage scenario!

Ferdinand , rostering for 'general' Rob Lee, performed big when offensive hitman Asprilla created a net-shot opportunity early in the first quarter.

Now it was the Newcastle defense performing hang-tough with hardman Ginola toughing out McManaman though a non-call with 12.14 on the game-clock which could have led to a card red ejection.

Ginola stayed on the field of play however and found net space to make it 1-2 and had the scouse star's fans choking on their hot dogs.

Field player Ginola now has 323 out-field minutes this semester, a raise of 71 on this semester at premier soccer '94.

McManaman then saw a number of long range field plays go amiss while Fowler strikage stats were not helped when he failed to find nettage 8 metres into the goal-strike area.

This awesome kick-fest stayed at 1-2 during the line out break time and so the second period started with with spunky team Liverpool facing a zip points scenario.

Early in the first quarter of the second period 'general' Rob Lee hit into the shot-zone, forcing David James to blank once more.

Veteran coachman Roy Evans then placed two cornermen in the net-box to negate Newcastle's cross field-play upfielded efforts.

It's a score levelage scenario again!

Star offensive lineman Robert Fowler finds his net form and snatches the equaliser in his sophomore semester and that will be another goal stoppage!

Soon however, Asprillia, whose face is the most-sported pin in tournament merchandising stat-history this semester, lofted a high field ball way over the goal keep zone leaving David James with no chance to defend the goal bag.

Redknapp, leader of the team LFC on converted set-plays, tried from range but did not improve on his negative score-stat scenario.

Liverpool were now facing a 2-3 reverse and team red's Razor Ruddock added to his rap sheet when he was sin-binned for stud-checking on net-shooter Asprilla. Boy that was a big defensive hit!

It's a score levelage scenario again!

Team LFC however found a power-strike from Collymore and, deep into injury stoppage zone Collymore finds the shot-zone once
more to give team LFC all 3 points.

Posted by fastmp3 on Jul-23-2006 21:09:

i have a preference for Arsenal

Posted by evil_bastard on Jul-24-2006 23:38:

Here's what the yanks have to say about us:

quote:
NEWCASTLE UNITED

� American Comparison: The Oakland Raiders.

� Nickname: The Magpies.

� In a Nutshell: They're named after a beer I actually like. What's better than that? Plus, these guys received more e-mails just about their wild fans than anyone else, including "their fans are like the Raiders [fans] times 10" � "the most violently dedicated fans in the world and they never win" � "you think Boston is a port city that obsesses over a team, go to Newcastle, there is no city more filled with more drunk (read, absolutely sloshed) college-aged kids in the world" � "their fans are terrific: they are the most blue-collar, passionate, loyal, and drunk off their ass fans in the league that sing songs like 'Who the F*** are Manchester United.'" � "they inspire such enmity in their rivals that I have been verbally abused no less than four times by strangers for wearing their jersey."

� Can't Decide if This is a Bonus Reason For or Against: According to the readers, "They have a rabid fan base from a depressed former industrial town where the accent makes fans' speech absolutely incomprehensible," which they call "Geordie" (like it's a real language). In other words, it's just like Rhode Island.

� Bonus reason to pick them: Did I mention they're named after a beer? As one reader points out, "There is no better way to announce your team allegiance during a match when you first walk into a bar; the bartender asks what are you having and you can proudly announce 'Newcastle.' Often gets a beer raise and nod of the head from the other Newcastle fans watching the match." Sounds like fun.

� Single Best Reason NOT to Pick Them: The tortured history. For instance, they famously blew a 12-point lead down the stretch in '96 that sounds suspiciously like the 14-game lead that the Red Sox blew in '78. I'd rather not go down that road again. But I'm going to make a more concerted effort to drink their beer.