Found this video of Andrew Dice Clay's famous nursery rhymes, this isn't even close to his best stand up routine but it's preety good.
Posted by DjDeComp on Oct-20-2006 05:50:
ehhh
Posted by Nrg2Nfinit on Oct-20-2006 05:59:
haha i liked the last one lol
Posted by astroboy on Oct-20-2006 06:29:
Meh that was shit.. not clever at all. Any dickhead with an hour to spare could write a bunch of dirty little poems like that.
Posted by RJT on Oct-20-2006 06:29:
Never been a fan of Andrew Dice Clay - Just seems like a gigantic, unfunny asshole.
Posted by astroboy on Oct-20-2006 06:32:
quote:
Originally posted by RJT
Never been a fan of Andrew Dice Clay - Just seems like a gigantic, unfunny asshole.
Don't you get it? He said cock ahahaahaha, and pussy hahahahahaahaha and blowjob bahaahah
Posted by RJT on Oct-20-2006 06:35:
Hey yo, check it out Vinnie! I like, stuck my cock in this bitches pussy, you see? Yeah, humpty fuckin' dumpty and shit.
Fuckin' A.
/diceclay
Brilliant, right?
Posted by astroboy on Oct-20-2006 06:51:
quote:
Originally posted by RJT
Hey yo, check it out Vinnie! I like, stuck my cock in this bitches pussy, you see? Yeah, humpty fuckin' dumpty and shit.
Fuckin' A.
/diceclay
Brilliant, right?
I was so overwhelmed by the wit I forgot to laugh... nice impersonation tho. Posted by Dj_Skez on Oct-20-2006 06:54:
quote:
Originally posted by RJT
Hey yo, check it out Vinnie! I like, stuck my cock in this bitches pussy, you see? Yeah, humpty fuckin' dumpty and shit.
Fuckin' A.
/diceclay
Brilliant, right?
there is no doubt he's a 2nd class stand up comedian, he doesn't even come close to guys like Chris Rock. I know he's a rude prick and that his jokes are straight out of elementary school, it's just the way he delivers them with his heavey brooklyn new york accent that makes me laugh. Here a few of his fucked up jokes.
"I see a midget crossing the street, I floor the fucking gas petal, that's the end of it. Even if a cop stops me two blocks away, he's like, 'Did you see what you did back there?' I'm like, 'No, what happened? What happened now?' 'You hit a midget.' 'A midget? I thought it was a big fucking bird, I'm sorry. You'll clean that up, right?' 'Yeah, go ahead. Don't worry about it, it's a midget.'"
"I saw this chick in the grocery. I'm in line waiting to check out and I notice in her cart, she's got like a box of them giant like Q-Tip sticks they stick in there, for that time of the month. I'm trying to be nice with the chick, you know. So I say, 'Hey, I bet you'll be sucking a lot of dick this week.' So she's looking at me like, 'What did you say?' I said, 'I bet you'll be sucking a lot of dick this week. Just talking.' She calls the manager over, 'He said I'll be sucking dick all week.' The manager's like, 'Where do I get a ticket and line up for this?'"
there's a new comedian who uses profanity as much as he does, but she's a lot funnier imo, her name is Lisa Lampanelli, I saw her standup and the way she insulted pamela anderson on her comedy roast on VH1.
Posted by Dj_Skez on Oct-20-2006 07:02:
To make up for the lame Diceman video heres 2 great Chris Rock videos.
Posted by Silky Johnson on Oct-20-2006 07:08:
quote:
Originally posted by Dj_Skez
there's a new comedian who uses profanity as much as he does, but she's a lot funnier imo, her name is Lisa Lampanelli,
That the fat broad? If so, I saw her on the Howard Stern show at Artie Lang's roast.
Posted by Dj_Skez on Oct-20-2006 07:11:
quote:
Originally posted by jennypie
That the fat broad? If so, I saw her on the Howard Stern show at Artie Lang's roast.
yep , that's her. I haven't seen her routine on Artie Lang's roast yet, was she funny?
Posted by guster on Oct-20-2006 09:53:
"Little Miss Muffett sat on a tuffett,
Eating her curds and whey.
Along came a spider and sat down beside her and said,
Hey, what's in the bowl, bitch?"
lol.
Posted by bas on Oct-20-2006 13:40:
quote:
Originally posted by Dj_Skez
there's a new comedian who uses profanity as much as he does, but she's a lot funnier imo, her name is Lisa Lampanelli, I saw her standup and the way she insulted pamela anderson on her comedy roast on VH1.
Lisa Lampanelli isn't all that new Posted by StanVoid on Oct-20-2006 13:50:
this is horrible ... this video
Posted by EXTREMUM on Oct-20-2006 16:40:
quote:
Originally posted by Dj_Skez
To make up for the lame Diceman video heres 2 great Chris Rock videos.
NOW, that is comedy! Posted by UWM on Oct-20-2006 16:43:
quote:
Originally posted by Dj_Skez
"I see a midget crossing the street, I floor the fucking gas petal, that's the end of it. Even if a cop stops me two blocks away, he's like, 'Did you see what you did back there?' I'm like, 'No, what happened? What happened now?' 'You hit a midget.' 'A midget? I thought it was a big fucking bird, I'm sorry. You'll clean that up, right?' 'Yeah, go ahead. Don't worry about it, it's a midget.'"
That might possibly be the most unfunny joke I've ever heard.
Posted by EXTREMUM on Oct-20-2006 16:44:
quote:
Originally posted by UWM
That might possibly be the most unfunny joke I've ever heard.
x2 Posted by Vivid Boy on Oct-20-2006 23:27:
this guy is dave chappelle back in the 80's. theres no real difference, both obscene silly and funny.
the only difference between the 2 is the era they were telling jokes.
Posted by Akridrot on Oct-20-2006 23:29:
quote:
zoeuurotten (3 weeks ago)
the people in the crowd are the best
Posted by Dj_Skez on Oct-21-2006 08:19:
quote:
Originally posted by UWM
That might possibly be the most unfunny joke I've ever heard.
without a doubt one of the worst. When I was 19 , I bought one of his audio cds and just sat in my room and smoked a blunt to the face. Then I popped the cd in and just laid back in my bed high as hell and laughed so hard from his delivery. It's just so much funnier when you're high. I remember one of his jokes on the cd.
So this bitch asks me "how did you sleep?"
and I said "how the fuck should I know, I was asleep"
I don't really know why but I burst out laughing. It was probably the purple haze.
Posted by Dj_Skez on Oct-21-2006 08:24:
quote:
Originally posted by dj_bas
Lisa Lampanelli isn't all that new
Why don't you take that tongue smilie and shove it up your mom's shit stained asshole. At least you're not a midget though, they got them heads.
