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-- Things that make you go, hmmmmm...


Posted by Spin Laden on Jan-22-2008 20:58:

Things that make you go, hmmmmm...

1. If you take an Oriental person and spin
him around several times, does he become disoriented?

2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why
aren't people from Holland called Holes?

3. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults
enjoy adultery?

4. If a pig loses its voice, is it
disgruntled?

5. If love is blind, why is lingerie so
popular?

6. Why is the man who invests all your money
called a broker?

7. When cheese gets its picture taken, what
does it say?

8. Why is a person who plays the piano called
a pianist but a person who drives a racing car not
called a racist?

9. Why are a wise man and a wise guy
opposites?

10. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite
things?

11. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety
one?

12. 'I am' is reportedly the shortest sentence
in the English language. Could it be that 'I do' is
the longest sentence?

13. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen
defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be
delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models
deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners
depressed?


14. What hair colour do they put on the driver's
licenses of bald men?

15. I thought about how mothers feed their
babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered
what do Chinese mothers use - tooth picks?

16. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in
the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to
them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the
postage stamps so the postmen can look for them while
they deliver the mail?

17. You never really learn to swear until you
learn to drive.

18. No one ever says, 'It's only a game' when
their team is winning.

19. Last night I played a blank tape at full
blast. The mime next door went bonkers.

20. Ever wonder about those people who spend
�2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water?
Try spelling Evian backwards:

NAIVE

21. Isn't making a smoking section in a
restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming
pool?

22. OK ... so if the Jacksonville Jaguars are
known as the 'Jags' and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are
known as the 'Bucs,' what does that make the Tennessee
Titans?

23. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea,
does that mean that one person actually ENJOYS it?


Posted by thesauce23 on Jan-22-2008 21:00:

Re: Things that make you go, hmmmmm...

quote:
Originally posted by Spin Laden

14. What hair colour do they put on the driver's
licenses of bald men?


only one that made me go ahhhhhhhhhh

BUT-- why is a pizza box square not circle?


Posted by afterhrsgurl on Jan-22-2008 21:08:

Re: Things that make you go, hmmmmm...

quote:
Originally posted by Spin Laden
20. Ever wonder about those people who spend
�2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water?
Try spelling Evian backwards:


21. Isn't making a smoking section in a
restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming
pool?

LOL...i like these two


Posted by I_Am_Vince on Jan-22-2008 21:12:

Why is there 8 hot dog buns in a bag
but 12 hot dogs in a package


Posted by Revival160 on Jan-22-2008 21:15:

Why am I reading this thread?


Posted by thesauce23 on Jan-22-2008 21:15:

parking on driveways?

driving on parkways?


Posted by smuncky on Jan-22-2008 21:17:

if a quiz is a quizicle, then wat is a test?


Posted by Ozmozis on Jan-22-2008 21:21:

Is the opposite of �pro� �noob�?


Posted by I_Am_Vince on Jan-22-2008 21:24:

If a man alone in the woods said something would a woman still say he was wrong?


How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?


In libraries, do they put the bible in the fiction or non-fiction section?


Why is it that if someone yells "duck" they are helping you, but if they yell "chicken" they are insulting you?


How's come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up.


Why do we have to pay a toll on "freeways"?


Posted by afterhrsgurl on Jan-22-2008 21:25:

quote:
Originally posted by �Zm�zis
Is the opposite of �pro� �noob�?

fail


Posted by Ozmozis on Jan-22-2008 21:26:

quote:
Originally posted by afterhrsgurl
fail


My plan was to get your attention all along and it worked... Now time to get married... at Guv...


Posted by smuncky on Jan-22-2008 21:28:

why


Posted by thesauce23 on Jan-22-2008 21:29:

quote:
Originally posted by afterhrsgurl
fail



Posted by Dr. DAS on Jan-22-2008 21:40:

quote:

19. Last night I played a blank tape at full
blast. The mime next door went bonkers.


lolz


Posted by mnemonic. on Jan-23-2008 03:01:

quote:
Originally posted by Dr. DAS
lolz



Posted by mnemonic. on Jan-23-2008 03:03:

quote:
Originally posted by �Zm�zis
Is the opposite of �pro� �noob�?


NO ITS LVL 1 SCOUT DIPSHIT !!!

(kidding!)


Posted by infinity HiGH on Jan-23-2008 03:38:

Every year about 98% of atoms in your body are replaced.

At a glance, the Celsius scale makes more sense than the Fahrenheit scale for temperature measuring. But its creator, Anders Celsius, was an oddball scientist. When he first developed his scale, he made freezing 100 degrees and boiling 0 degrees, or upside down. No one dared point this out to him, so fellow scientists waited until Celsius died to change the scale.

In Gulliver's Travels Jonathan Swift described the two moons of Mars, Phobos and Deimos, giving their exact size and speeds of rotation. He did this more than 100 years before either moon was discovered.

At a jet plane's speed of 1,000 km (620mi) per hour, the length of the plane becomes one atom shorter than its original length.


Posted by DaRoZa on Jan-23-2008 07:19:

how come so many people, tv shows etc. jokingly make the star wars reference "luke... i am your father", when the line was actually "NO, i am your father!"?


Posted by CAKE on Jan-23-2008 13:09:

This made my morning I LoL'ed


Posted by soupastah on Jan-24-2008 02:14:

quote:
Originally posted by Invasionmix
Why is there 8 hot dog buns in a bag
but 12 hot dogs in a package


this has pissed me off to no avail


Posted by Zentac_75 on Jan-24-2008 03:35:

Why do some drive-thru atms have brail on the buttons ?!?!?!?!


Posted by FunkyCrew on Jan-24-2008 04:02:

people on buses pushing their way through from the back of the bus to exit at the front doors



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