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Pick-up lines!

So just for some Friday fun, let's all hear your favourite pick up lines, stories on pick up attempts, or ladies some best/worst pick up lines you've ever heard.


Here's a playful one I've read somewhere:

Approach the girl: "Hey my friend over there wants to know if you think I'm cute"


Here's a couple that would get you slapped:

You're ugly... but you intrigue me
Wow you're gorgeous, who's your plastic surgeon?

i tried "nice shoes. lets fuck!" with jennypie and it worked!

quote:

Originally posted by chinamon i tried "nice shoes. lets fuck!" with jennypie and it worked!

And that's why you should never drink, kids.

"hey!?! do you have a little Italian in you????

she says no

"do you want one?"

quote:

Originally posted by capo tutti di "hey!?! do you have a little Italian in you???? she says no "do you want one?"

oh yeah...i recall someone's ALT on here trying that one on me...but they failed..big time!!loool you know who you are!!!!

I bet you 20 bucks you're gonna turn me down

My buddy Luc just would turn to everygirl in the bar after dancing 30 secs or more and say "where is this going? are going to fuck tonite"...and without one word of a lie he'd get laid everynite...i think he slept with about 75+ girls in 4 years of university at waterloo..we either got to watch, seen video, pics or just knew flat out....you miss 100 percent of the shots you dont take..i guess lol

quote:

Originally posted by capo tutti di My buddy Luc just would turn to everygirl in the bar after dancing 30 secs or more and say "where is this going? are going to fuck tonite"...and without one word of a lie he'd get laid everynite...i think he slept with about 75+ girls in 4 years of university at waterloo..we either got to watch, seen video, pics or just knew flat out....you miss 100 percent of the shots you dont take..i guess lol

the poor guy banged 75+ ugly fatties.

quote:

Originally posted by jennypie And that's why you should never drink, kids.

i didnt like how you giggled when you dropped my pants.

"Does this rag smell like chlorophorm to you?"

quote:

Originally posted by afterhrsgurl oh yeah...i recall someone's ALT on here trying that one on me...but they failed..big time!!loool you know who you are!!!!

Do you want to have sex or should I apologize?

quote:

Originally posted by Dr. DAS "Does this rag smell like chlorophorm to you?"

omg I actually lol'd

quote:

Originally posted by chinamon the poor guy banged 75+ ugly fatties.

mostly...he had some quality in there tho...but hey i mean he wanted to get laid and he did, one time he was talking this chick up on a couch that nooooooobody wanted to touch...i dont wanna be mean but god bless her lol

anyways...i'd leave and enter the patio and hear "your beautiful" she didnt bite then i'd hear "is it bad i am picturing you naked" no dice still, i heard some pathetic begging...what happened in the end was I walked out and as i do, I hear the girl yell "OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK"

and Luc has his cock out, just sitting there with a look on his face like nothing happened...not even touching it just letting it fucking sit hahahahahahahahahahahaha

Are we in a library, cause I'm checkin you out.


I wish you were sin^2(x), and I was cos^2(x), so together, we could be one.

Are you a speeding ticket? because you have got fiiinne written all over ya!

Was your daddy a meat burglar? Because it look like someone stuck two nice hams down the back of your pants

Would you like to see the expedential growth of my natural log?

quote:

Originally posted by capo tutti di My buddy Luc just would turn to everygirl in the bar after dancing 30 secs or more and say "where is this going? are going to fuck tonite"...and without one word of a lie he'd get laid everynite...i think he slept with about 75+ girls in 4 years of university at waterloo..we either got to watch, seen video, pics or just knew flat out....you miss 100 percent of the shots you dont take..i guess lol

Statistics work if you want to bang anything...

quote:

Originally posted by �Zm�zis Statistics work if you want to bang anything...

Buddy you and I both know, if you need to get laid, just go to trappers...if you cant get laid then your gay...literally

quote:

Originally posted by capo tutti di one time he was talking this chick up on a couch that nooooooobody wanted to touch...i dont wanna be mean but god bless her lol

that made me think of "you might not be the best looking girl here but beauty is only a light switch away"

quote:

Originally posted by afterhrsgurl that made me think of "you might not be the best looking girl here but beauty is only a light switch away"

similar to "you might not be the best looking girl here but I'm the only one talking to you"

quote:

Originally posted by capo tutti di Buddy you and I both know, if you need to get laid, just go to trappers...if you cant get laid then your gay...literally

Dude, you don't even want to know my trappers stories lol... Everyone that works there knows me. Infact I'm cough cough a girl that works there...

It always starts at trappers and then ends outside of sun suns lol, shortly followed by the cops showing up...

For all those men out there that need to get laid:

5. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.

4. Nice legs, what time do they open?

3. My ride left without me , can you give me one?

2. You must work at Subway, 'cause you just gave me a footlong.

1. (Motion with your finger for a girl to come over, when she gets there say) I knew if I fingered you long enough you would cum.

BOOYAH!!! lol

quote:

Originally posted by �Zm�zis Dude, you don't even want to know my trappers stories lol... Everyone that works there knows me. Infact I'm cough cough a girl that works there... It always starts at trappers and then ends outside of sun suns lol, shortly followed by the cops showing up...

tazers and pepper sprays...i know brotha...have u checked out that caribean place on cork street?? where the old salsateria was?? not too bad...

whose your gf? is she a local??

quote:

Originally posted by capo tutti di tazers and pepper sprays...i know brotha...have u checked out that caribean place on cork street?? where the old salsateria was?? not too bad... whose your gf? is she a local??

Who said anything about a g/f? lol

No, not local, I've had enough of them Guelph Townies lol... all coke heads, at least soon or later.

I might go to trappers next saturday! haha Whenever we go its a shit show haha

I haven't heard about that caribean place but my places is the GYRO lady across the street haha she loves me.

quote:

Originally posted by italarmo For all those men out there that need to get laid: 5. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under. 4. Nice legs, what time do they open? 3. My ride left without me , can you give me one? 2. You must work at Subway, 'cause you just gave me a footlong. 1. (Motion with your finger for a girl to come over, when she gets there say) I knew if I fingered you long enough you would cum. BOOYAH!!! lol

So if I used those lines on you, does that mean me and you can have a penetration relationship?

Just pull your dick out and point at all like "Eh? EH??"

I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.

(Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

Nice legs...what time do they open?

Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.

You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you

I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher,have you seen one?

I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on earth tonight.

Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell out of me.

I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.

I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway to heaven?

You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

Are those real?

You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

(Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

You. Me. Whipped cream. Handcuffs. Any questions?

F @# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Helga Titsbottom?

Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute."

Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you.

My name isn't Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you want to.

I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have you been drinking?

If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public

Wanna come over for some pizza and sex? No? Why, don't you like pizza?

Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me

Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I ???

Do you wash your pants in Windolene because I can see myself in them.

I lost my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room

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