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Posted by tubularbills on Aug-09-2008 15:36:

i've got problems

So, i'm a scorpio. and i've always really felt like i fit the description very well.

quote:
from wiki
Being a water sign, Scorpio is considered highly passionate, imaginative, determined, persevering, inflexible and self-confident.

.

lately, however, it seems as if the scorpio is getting the worst of me. i've always been a pretty passionate person, so much so that its just normal for me. example: when i kiss...i really do KISS...its not just some put my tongue down your throat or whatever. in bed, i always like things to last a long time...not just some quickie (at least, not all the time...nooners are fun every once in awhile, but both parties have to be cool w/ it).

but those (amongst other) things are coming off as "ways you express yourself if you want the next step in a relationship"...but to me it doesn't feel that way; and i'm not trying to portray myself as that, but i apparently cannot express that; and no matter what i say, doesn't make a difference to the other person.

i want to be able to avoid this (because its making me feel like shit) but at the same time, i can't just pull a 180 and be all stand-off-ish; cause its just not who i am. i feel like i'm watching Vanilla Sky and the other person thinks i'm the cameron diaz character when i really don't feel that way. (seriously, just cause we fucked 4 times, does not "mean something")

c0r version: what have you done to keep a "friend w/ benefits" simply just that? and have you ever been in a spot where the other party thought you were taking it "to the next step" when you really weren't?


Posted by Silky Johnson on Aug-09-2008 15:39:

If it were me, I'd just fuck a friend who isn't actually my friend. Someone I actually don't respect. Cause then I could fuck them silly and treat them like a toy without feeling guilt or attachment.


Posted by cmay119 on Aug-09-2008 15:41:

Friends with benefits is a slippery slope. It's not as easy as one may think, keeping the two parties on the same 'wave-length'.


Posted by Vivid Boy on Aug-09-2008 15:43:

im a pure aries.

fuck passion, get to the point


when i kiss im already trying to get my dick in your mouth

when i sleep with you im trying to beat my last best personal time.


and when i love, im just trying to get you in bed


Posted by elFreak on Aug-09-2008 15:54:

i'm pure pisces..i'll fuck the shit out of them then yell , "welcome to the internet!" .


Posted by Dervish on Aug-09-2008 16:05:

This is all seeming a bit:





Nah has similar issues myself hate seeing "that look" where they want more. Blah.

My plan is to just stop tapping anything and everything. Maybe drink less or something (seems unlikely lol). Or maybe just get a proper gf.


Posted by tubularbills on Aug-09-2008 16:11:

quote:
Originally posted by jennypie
If it were me, I'd just fuck a friend who isn't actually my friend. Someone I actually don't respect. Cause then I could fuck them silly and treat them like a toy without feeling guilt or attachment.


and that's what makes you a whore, my good friend Jenny.

does sex with someone you know always have to mean "something", however? can't it just be a way to satisfy some of those needs on maslow's hierarchy of needs? (i'm thinking physical needs, not emotional)

is it so much to ask to fuck and then watch Sopranos?

i mean, you're a chick---if a guy fucks you do you automatically think that he wants you as more than just a benefit?

quote:
Originally posted by Dervish

My plan is to just stop tapping anything and everything. Maybe drink less or something (seems unlikely lol). Or maybe just get a proper gf.


lol, its funny that you mention alcohol; because the first two times we hung out was around booze. but neither of us were really drunk.

one of the first things i mentioned when we met too was that i was leaving in a few months....so a relationship wasn't possible...was just looking for a cool friend to hang out with. then we fucked. and then we fucked again. since then its been a mixture of hanging out (we cooked vodka sauce the other night); and fucking. except last night i got "the conversation" about "are we still on the same wave-length?" (like cmay mentioned)

admittedly, i do have a little bit of a crush. that sounds so juvienelle, but its just that....like infatuation, not like, "omg i wanna spend the rest of my life with you" type of scenario.

ugh.


Posted by Silky Johnson on Aug-09-2008 16:16:

quote:
Originally posted by tubularbills
i mean, you're a chick---if a guy fucks you do you automatically think that he wants you as more than just a benefit?




Not at all. That's the last thing I would think, in fact. I would think "This guy just wants some pussy", and nothing more.


Posted by tubularbills on Aug-09-2008 16:17:

quote:
Originally posted by jennypie
Not at all. That's the last thing I would think, in fact. I would think "This guy just wants some pussy", and nothing more.



what if we fucked and then had dinner (not the other way around)?


Posted by Dervish on Aug-09-2008 16:17:

You sound unsure? The ones I have had issues with have been what I've considered one night stands never this kinda thing.

See fact is if you are friendly with them and have a good time hanging about with them and talking to them etc AND they are fit AND let you shag them. It is kinda the recipe for a relationship.


Posted by tubularbills on Aug-09-2008 16:21:

quote:
Originally posted by Dervish

See fact is if you are friendly with them and have a good time hanging about with them and talking to them etc AND they are fit AND let you shag them. It is kinda the recipe for a relationship.


fuck

btw, this is the 2nd time this has happened to me in like the past 4 months.


Posted by Silky Johnson on Aug-09-2008 16:23:

quote:
Originally posted by tubularbills
what if we fucked and then had dinner (not the other way around)?




Well yeah, then it's clear it's all about the sex...cause dinner is the reward instead of the other way around.


Posted by Dervish on Aug-09-2008 16:32:

See I'd say have dinner while having sex then it'll all be clear. Like eat it off each other. Then when you're done, *yawn* "Prob should get to sleep early start tomorrow....so.... you got money for the bus?" Anything else will just cloud the issue!

But really if it is just sex that's pretty much the only way that keeps it clear. Anything else is a mine field.


Posted by Ted Promo on Aug-09-2008 16:36:

at all this astrological bollocks.


Posted by tubularbills on Aug-09-2008 16:50:

quote:
Originally posted by Dervish
See I'd say have dinner while having sex then it'll all be clear. Like eat it off each other. Then when you're done, *yawn* "Prob should get to sleep early start tomorrow....so.... you got money for the bus?" Anything else will just cloud the issue!

But really if it is just sex that's pretty much the only way that keeps it clear. Anything else is a mine field.


i feel like i'm learning this the hard way.

blach!


Posted by Dervish on Aug-09-2008 16:51:

quote:
Originally posted by Ted Promo
at all this astrological bollocks.


I dunno but I'd guess that a Scorpio should just dump his stinger in someone the scuttle off really. Do not pass go do not collect emotional attachment.


Posted by Omega_Blue on Aug-09-2008 16:53:

gay gay gay


Posted by DJ Mikey Mike on Aug-09-2008 17:01:

Out of all the idiots on this board who might actually take heed in horoscopes, why am I not surprised it's tubular-fucking-bills?


Posted by Silky Johnson on Aug-09-2008 17:02:

WHOREoscopes?




:/


Posted by Ted Promo on Aug-09-2008 17:28:

quote:
Originally posted by Dervish
I dunno but I'd guess that a Scorpio should just dump his stinger in someone the scuttle off really. Do not pass go do not collect emotional attachment.


is with all this Steve Irwin bollocks?


Posted by squirrelly on Aug-09-2008 18:08:

Idiot! It's fuck and then peace out! Otherwise the person gets attached. No slumber parties, and no dinner!


Posted by Ted Promo on Aug-09-2008 18:11:

quote:
Originally posted by squirrelly
Idiot! It's fuck and then peace out! Otherwise the person gets attached. No slumber parties, and no dinner!


I fuck at slumber parties more often than not


Posted by Yohan on Aug-09-2008 18:13:

clearly you're not a friends with benefit type.

then don't do it.

go pick up a random hoe at bars and clubs for one night stand instead if you need to get laid


Posted by tubularbills on Aug-09-2008 18:16:

quote:
Originally posted by squirrelly
Idiot! It's fuck and then peace out! Otherwise the person gets attached. No slumber parties, and no dinner!


is it possible to have attachment in the sense that you only have one "friend w/ benefit" ? without it being a relationship?

quote:
Originally posted by Yohan
clearly you're not a friends with benefit type.

then don't do it.

go pick up a random hoe at bars and clubs for one night stand instead if you need to get laid


lol, that's what new orleans was for.

then i got mono

oh god i've started drinking


Posted by Yohan on Aug-09-2008 18:19:

quote:
Originally posted by tubularbills
is it possible to have attachment in the sense that you only have one "friend w/ benefit" ? without it being a relationship?

clearly you do not understand what a friend with benefits mean


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