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Posted by jonas on Sep-09-2008 18:36:

Why do some sink and some float?

So there I am evacuating my lunch from el colon and noticed, once again, the phenomenon of sinkers vs. floaters. Any idea what differentiates one chunk of terd from the other when they are part of the same bowel movement and 'ingredients'?

Posted by D Dubya on Sep-09-2008 18:37:

Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by jonas
So there I am evacuating my lunch from el colon and noticed, once again, the phenomenon of sinkers vs. floaters. Any idea what differentiates one chunk of terd from the other when they are part of the same bowel movement and 'ingredients'?

i'm going with more trapped methane.

Posted by jonas on Sep-09-2008 18:42:

Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by Dirk W.
i'm going with more trapped methane.

OK. But you're telling me that the first four inches of terd that break away from the mother ship could have more methane gas than the rest of the fleet?

Posted by Carlos Pereira on Sep-09-2008 18:50:

Re: Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

Posted by D Dubya on Sep-09-2008 18:57:

Re: Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by jonas
OK. But you're telling me that the first four inches of terd that break away from the mother ship could have more methane gas than the rest of the fleet?

sure.

[hypothesis]
i submit this trapped methane occurs in what we will call "pockets". these methane rich "pockets" occur randomly throughout the turd. the 4 inch "cruiser turd" could have a larger methane "pocket" than the "mother ship turd" and the rest of the "fleet" - therefore, the buoyancy of the "cruiser turd" would be different explaining why some sink and some float.
[/hypothesis]

Posted by jonas on Sep-09-2008 19:05:

Re: Re: Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by Dirk W.
sure.

[hypothesis]
i submit this trapped methane occurs in what we will call "pockets". these methane rich "pockets" occur randomly throughout the turd. the 4 inch "cruiser turd" could have a larger methane "pocket" than the "mother ship turd" and the rest of the "fleet" - therefore, the buoyancy of the "cruiser turd" would be different explaining why some sink and some float.
[/hypothesis]

So when a wounded cruiser turd is only half floating, did it spring a leak in the hull and is now releasing said methane gas?

Posted by D Dubya on Sep-09-2008 19:08:

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by jonas
So when a wounded cruiser turd is only half floating, did it spring a leak in the hull and is now releasing said methane gas?

yes, that would fit the theory

Posted by jonas on Sep-09-2008 19:16:

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by Dirk W.
yes, that would fit the theory

Ok, now I can sleep better at night.

Posted by D Dubya on Sep-09-2008 19:17:

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Why do some sink and some float?

quote:
Originally posted by jonas
Ok, now I can sleep better at night.

anything to help

Posted by iclone on Sep-09-2008 21:37:

depends on the amount of fat in your diet. true.

Posted by jonas on Sep-09-2008 21:43:

quote:
Originally posted by iclone
depends on the amount of fat in your diet. true.

So if some float and some sink, does that mean I have a balanced diet?

Posted by seekrets on Sep-09-2008 21:59:

If it floats that means you have been eating foods rich in fiber which is a good thing

Posted by mwaldron on Sep-09-2008 22:06:

Push or Breath

I think that it would be relavent if you determined if these varying segments happen during a PUSH or BREATH cycle.

During a PUSH cycle you could be creating a more dense discharge, thus less bouyant.

During a BREATH cycle the discharge would not have been compacted as much retaining more of said methane to provide the bouyancy needed to achieve floatation.

Posted by winston on Sep-09-2008 22:33:

quote:
Originally posted by jonas

So if some float and some sink, does that mean I have a balanced diet?

Posted by jonas on Sep-09-2008 22:34:

Re: Push or Breath

quote:
Originally posted by mwaldron
I think that it would be relavent if you determined if these varying segments happen during a PUSH or BREATH cycle.

During a PUSH cycle you could be creating a more dense discharge, thus less bouyant.

During a BREATH cycle the discharge would not have been compacted as much retaining more of said methane to provide the bouyancy needed to achieve floatation.

I've noticed corn turd has, by far, the most bouyancy. This could be due to the natural ethanol content in corn.

Posted by Matthias on Sep-09-2008 22:41:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_feces

Posted by Slow Motion on Sep-09-2008 22:43:

Thread of the day!!!

Posted by Rememberence_ on Sep-09-2008 22:52:

fkn fecophiliacs

Posted by jonas on Sep-10-2008 00:28:

quote:
Originally posted by Slow Motion
Thread of the day!!!

He's Lance Cashion, and he approves this thread.

Paid for by the Sink or Swim Research Institute

Posted by Carlos Pereira on Sep-10-2008 01:07:

quote:
Originally posted by jonas
He's Lance Cashion, and he approves this thread.

Paid for by the Sink or Swim Research Institute

LOL@sinkNswim.

I'm loving that chart on wiki. I would love to have a poster like that in my room, just above my bed.

Posted by progress on Sep-10-2008 07:10:

Re: Re: Push or Breath

quote:
Originally posted by jonas
I've noticed corn turd has, by far, the most bouyancy. This could be due to the natural ethanol content in corn.

Corn doesn't contain ethanol you shitburger, it's used to make it.....

Posted by jonas on Sep-10-2008 13:26:

Re: Re: Re: Push or Breath

quote:
Originally posted by Schwab
Corn doesn't contain ethanol you shitburger, it's used to make it.....

It was a joke, Opie. A joke.

Posted by jonas on Sep-10-2008 13:27:

Re: Re: Re: Push or Breath

quote:
Originally posted by Schwab
Corn doesn't contain ethanol you shitburger, it's used to make it.....

It was a joke, Opie. A joke.

Posted by bigsnail on Sep-10-2008 14:51:

LMAO @ this thread.

Posted by jonas on Sep-10-2008 16:28:

Re: Push or Breath

quote:
Originally posted by mwaldron
I think that it would be relavent if you determined if these varying segments happen during a PUSH or BREATH cycle.

During a PUSH cycle you could be creating a more dense discharge, thus less bouyant.

During a BREATH cycle the discharge would not have been compacted as much retaining more of said methane to provide the bouyancy needed to achieve floatation.

So I put this theory to the test after morning Starbucks and must say there is some validity to it.

While I could have gone with a normal flow of goodness whilst only breathing, I opted for turbo turding. Poor turd never had a chance. Just sank to the bottom like dirk's pride when he found out he was gay.

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