So last week i fired my secretary...

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-- So last week i fired my secretary...

Posted by Roweazie on Sep-25-2008 19:23:

So last week i fired my secretary...

Last week was my birthday. That morning I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, 'Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me.

As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone 'Happy Birthday'.

I thought� Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.. surely they will remember.

My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, 'Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!' It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock, when Jane knocked on my door and said, 'You know, it's so beautiful outside today, and it is your birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.'

I said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the best thing I've heard all day. Let's go!'

We went to lunch, but we didn't go where we normally would go. Instead, she chose a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office, Jane said, 'You know, It's such a beautiful day...We don't need to go straight back to the office, do we ?'

I responded, 'I guess not. What do you have in mind ?'

She said, 'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner.'
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said, 'If you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back.'

'Ok.' I nervously replied..

She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake � Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'..

And I just sat there...

On the couch..

naked...

Posted by david.michael on Sep-25-2008 19:28:

Oldie but a goodie.

Posted by digitalbreach on Sep-25-2008 19:29:

two laughy faces out of five

Posted by ChemEnhanced on Sep-25-2008 19:31:

well at least he was in his birthday suit

Posted by nchs09 on Sep-25-2008 20:06:

Funny.... is it old? i had never heard that before

Posted by iammesol on Sep-25-2008 20:07:

Posted by woscar on Sep-25-2008 20:18:

quote:
Originally posted by nchs09
Funny.... is it old? i had never heard that before

Yeah, I've got that e-mail at least three time before...still, oldie but goodie

Posted by Lira on Sep-25-2008 21:08:

quote:
Originally posted by nchs09
Funny.... is it old? i had never heard that before

I swear I'm not joking: I first heard this one in the nineties

Posted by Zoso on Sep-25-2008 21:09:

What did your wife say?

Posted by LoveHate on Sep-25-2008 21:11:

quote:
Originally posted by ChemEnhanced
well at least

Posted by Lira on Sep-25-2008 21:16:

quote:
Originally posted by Zoso
What did your wife say?

Now I know what's up!

Posted by josh rising on Sep-25-2008 22:38:

this story confuses me. was it your old secretary (the one you just fired) or the new one you replaced her with?

Posted by idoru on Sep-25-2008 22:41:

quote:
Originally posted by josh rising
this story confuses me. was it your old secretary (the one you just fired) or the new one you replaced her with?

The whole story is the reason he fired his secretary.

Posted by Roweazie on Sep-25-2008 22:45:

quote:
Originally posted by Zoso
What did your wife say?
"JESUS, Roweazieeee..."
then secretary reply "Bow Chicka Wow Wow..."

quote:
Originally posted by josh rising
this story confuses me. was it your old secretary (the one you just fired) or the new one you replaced her with?
damn bro. stay away from drugs from now on.

Posted by jupiterone on Sep-26-2008 03:27:

awesome

Posted by wesleysnipez on Sep-26-2008 03:34:

Always funny to read.