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-- New sample. Needing critique.

Posted by Kage_ on Jan-31-2009 23:14:

New sample. Needing critique.

Here's a rough sample of a new song I started today.

I'm just seeking critique on what I should change, mainly critique on the lead melody please.

[[ LINK REMOVED ]]

Thanks in advance, guys.

ps; if there is already a thread for track samples, don't crucify me.

Posted by owien on Jan-31-2009 23:43:

cool cool for a split second i thought i was at trance energy
but no anyway good tune

Posted by MrJiveBoJingles on Jan-31-2009 23:43:

It sounds a lot like some other melody I've heard before. From an epic trance track I think. Also it seems like there's too much reverb on that piano...

Posted by owien on Jan-31-2009 23:45:

oh and normally we post are tunes in the production forums lol but their is no rules in posing then here so ha

Posted by EddieZilker on Jan-31-2009 23:47:

I like the lead - the way it starts out and evolves. After the track gets going, with the beat, I almost wanted to hear another note in the arpeggio, every 2-8 beats to create a bit of a contrapuntal feel. I thought the pads behind that part of the lead were also a little too muted and needed to come up, but just ever so slightly - I appreciate what you're trying to do, in so far as creating an atmosphere for the body of the song to occupy.

Posted by adi_hanson on Jan-31-2009 23:59:

loose the jumpstyle kick and get a rolling bassline

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-01-2009 03:49:

Okay, so I revised the critique that was given and changed things around a bit. Here's a sample.

[[ LINK REMOVED ]]

I'm not sure which one is better now. There's something about the first sample that I feel is better though.

Posted by EddieZilker on Feb-01-2009 19:30:

GAH!! SHELVE THE BAASSS!!! SHELVE THE BASSS!!!

Just kidding... but seriously, shelve some of that bass.

The leads and rest of the instruments could come up to a more in the mix. It's a great beginning. This track has excellent potential.

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-01-2009 22:42:

Well I've added more to it now, it's still unfinished. As you can tell, I'm not that good with kicks & bass. So if anybody wants to collab with me, we can make this work.

Here's the update.

Speedyshare isn't working for me atm, so please bare with zippyshare.

[[ LINK REMOVED ]]

Thanks.

Posted by adi_hanson on Feb-01-2009 23:30:

yep shave a bit of the bass off at the beggining , and i would say (due to your other post) , stop trying to be like yoji , and progress this a little more with a little more build up than it has , and keep that piano volumed/filtered down for longer , and i can tell you put the thunder in from the tales from the big room version of Theme from banginglobe

but a bit more work , this will be good

Posted by daveth on Feb-01-2009 23:41:

It sounds a bit like you have reverb on the kick..?

It's very "boomy" in the beginning. Bit like a hardstyle type track.. other than that, tis developing great!!!

I would stretch out the melody progression a bit more, because it is very epic but it sort of comes a bit soon, and there's not enough time for the track to develop any tension. This makes it seem a bit empty somehow? You could tease the melody a bit more or use some *similar* motifs (using different instruments/sounds) in the beginning to introduce it?

Nice one

EDIT: on a second listen, it's almost like you're so excited to show us this melody that you... get there a bit early (was going to use some dirty metaphor but decided against it )... you need a bit more foreplay (oops)

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-02-2009 01:21:

Thanks for the tips, guys.

adi_hanson, I have never even heard of bangingglobe. :P The sameple I used was from a movie sound effects pack, as I do quite alot of epic music. I just love putting my mousic into an environment.

daveth, I'll extend it a bit more, I know what you mean. It still needs alot of work, imo.

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-03-2009 00:32:

I finished the next version, have a listen. There are some parts that are off, as my computer was crapping all over itself when trying to load everything. It was next to impossible to get it beat-perfect because of my computer.

Sorry for the double post.

[[ LINK REMOVED ]]

Posted by daveth on Feb-03-2009 01:36:

Listening now...

wow, I'm only 1min in and it's already so much improved! Great to hear this progress

It really builds some great tension by 2:36 now..
Dude, this is turning into a fucking GREAT track IMO.

To be honest, I don't really have anything major to add, it's so much improved from the last sample(s). I'll have a listen later and add some nit-picky comments maybe. Nice one

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-03-2009 10:04:

Thanks alot man. I appreciate it! I look forward to your nit-picky comments. :P

Posted by daveth on Feb-03-2009 11:34:

Keep in mind I'm just trying to offer you an unbiased set of somewhat-musical ears, not pro advice, and hence these're just my opinions

1 - the 6 consecutive kicks @ 0:11 seem a bit loud, it's like but not really in a good way, since the track isn't even getting going yet

2 - could try putting a high-pass over the first 8 bars and take it off after this, this might help give the drama you're going for there without scaring the shit out of people with those 6 kicks

3 - likewise, hi-hats @ 0:34 are a bit abrupt and "in your face" in a kind of scary/cheddar kinda way heh

4 - nice bass @ 0:30

5 - gets a *little* repetative from 0:35 through to 1:15 since this is essentially the same loop/idea again and again, and actually, we hear the same thing earlier (around the 0:20 mark). You already help to remedy this by opening up the filter, but its still a bit bland. Maybe try to introduce additional parts to the hook (develop it) after the 0:35 point or something? I dunno really.

6 - nice filters @ 1:23 onwards .. after listening again though, maybe differentiate the filter sweeps from each other somehow? Easy to get a bit like "haven't I heard this?"

7 - 2 kicks at 2:02 don't seem to fit (they seem off beat, but we haven't had a kick for a long time so its hard to tell, other than the fact that they "feel" out of place a bit)

8 - the vol. automation (piano) at 2:52 is a bit off -- there's abrupt volume changes, esp. at 3:00 and 3:18

9 - the strings that come in underneath at 3:52 are sweet

10 - the lead at 4:08 sounds a bit shite with the filter fully open, but it's only very brief. what are you using for this, can you try something different maybe?

Thats all I got

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-03-2009 13:50:

Yay. This should keep me busy! I know what you mean with what you're saying. As I said, my computer begins spazzing out when it gets too VST intensive. So, I have to sacrifice the variance of synths, for now. That's why they sound all samey.

With the kicks, yeah, it's a bit too in-your-face too soon.

As for the automation, I noticed those jumps in the audio fade, as I was automating it using my mouse and live recording, which is a nightmare, given that my computer was 2 blips away from a heart attack and my mouse can be reluctant to respond at the best of times.

I know, excuses excuses!

I'll get busy.

Posted by daveth on Feb-03-2009 14:14:

quote:
Originally posted by Kage_ As for the automation, I noticed those jumps in the audio fade, as I was automating it using my mouse and live recording, which is a nightmare, given that my computer was 2 blips away from a heart attack and my mouse can be reluctant to respond at the best of times.
wow, I thought for a sec there "maybe this is recorded live..?" what software you using?

Posted by cronodevir on Feb-03-2009 14:28:

Dunno who said take the reverb off the kick, but the kick sticks out like a sore thumb tbh. If you put the right kind of reverb on it, it can sound fine.

Imagine a picture in full color, then imagine a little peice of it uncolored. Thats what the song looks like.

Reverb works on pretty much any sound if you know how to program reverb and not use presets it can liven it up and give it a more atmosphearic feel, the track is pretty reverby, and then you have this dry ass kick pounding away... expriment a bit.

Posted by cronodevir on Feb-03-2009 14:28:

Posted by Kage_ on Feb-03-2009 15:41:

quote:
Originally posted by daveth
wow, I thought for a sec there "maybe this is recorded live..?" what software you using?

I'm using FL Studio 8. I use live automation and live sequencing when doing my tracks, then skim through it using the piano roll to tidy any parts that seem a bit off.

Posted by daveth on Feb-09-2009 04:39:

Cool, I wouldn't mind hearing this this sometime down the track if you do some more work on it, to hear how it's progressed.

Cheers man

Posted by meDina on Feb-09-2009 07:42:

hey dude,

maybe u want to take the click off of your reverse kick... and lower the volume on the reverse kick.

its fucking loud.

Posted by daeus on Feb-11-2009 16:55:

Sounds like happy hardcore at the moment albeit slower, just needs more depth, more going on!