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Indecisiveness vs. Indifference

I have two personality traits which affect my daily life as both a blessing and a curse: indecisiveness and indifference. I figure that there are probably others in this situation (and, obviously, plenty who are the polar opposite of that), so I'm opening it up for discussion.

Indecisiveness:

When I say that I'm indecisive, I'm not simply referring to "What shirt should I wear today?" or "Should I use this font or that font?" (though, these trivialities are also a common recurrence... I often find that I must "order under pressure" when at a restaurant, as the waiter/waitress stands waiting for my order, rather than deciding what I want ahead of time).

I'm talking about much more "bigger picture" issues. As an example, I can't decide where I stand on the U.S. second amendment issue. Part of me can't help but think that gun tolerance only leads to more death and violent crime, and yet another part of me can't help but think that "a dead offender is better than a repeat offender" (in the instance of a serial killer or rapist, for example). I'm not trying to turn this into a discussion about that topic in particular, I just felt that it provided an adequate example.

Indifference:

There are a lot of things which I just flat out don't give a crap about. Going back to a restaurant example, if a server brings me a steak that is well done and I asked for medium rare, I'll just eat it. If someone says something that isn't in line with what I believe in, meh. If someone does something to offend me, meh.

I think there is a lot to be said about my level of tolerance (and I don't think I want to change that, necessarily), but it's undeniable that it can easily lead to being a doormat. This was a large part of the failure of my marriage (since she was incredibly selfish and opinionated... the polar opposite of me). I also don't mean to make this a relationship thread, as I am in a fantastic one now... again, just an example.




It's annoying, because it's not that I don't have any passion or thoughts regarding anything ever. I just always have a tendency to be a "middle man". Does this make me wishy-washy? It's not that I don't want to have an opinion on anything, it's just that I am "too willing" to accept the other side of the coin. Too often, both sides of an argument make sense to me.

At the same time, I like it, because I don't like the typical American stereotype of being an ignorant sheep that blindly follows a line of thinking simply for the sake of it. But, is there a point where one can be "too fair"?

edit -- this also isn't to say that I'm not passionate about anything, or have no opinions ever. This is just a constant, daily recurrence with me.

For your birthday I'm getting you knives.

I suppose that I should also clarify: the reason that I separated indecisiveness from indifference is that indecisiveness involves decisions which I think are important (moral dilemmas, political issues, etc.), whereas indifference involves decisions that are the simple day-to-day, one-off things that happen.

(I CARE about the second amendment issue and think it's important for me to have an opinion on it, but I don't. I don't care much about the state of my sirloin, but common recurrence of dismissal leads to doormat syndrome.)

quote:

Originally posted by Ted Promo For your birthday I'm getting you knives.

I don't care. :-|

We're gonna stab vaginas together.

Meaning "just you and I", not like, sew vaginas together.

with knives.

Because that just couldn't happen now.

You just need to learn making decision based on emotions and intuition. Let emotions enter your life. Listen to epic Trance again. Or better yet, Eurodance.

try terrorcore

quote:

Originally posted by Ted Promo try terrorcore

I just had this image pop up in my head where you headbang with that girly blond hair to Terrorcore and now my belly hurts from laughing.

admit it, you want to place your penis next to my penis for an extended interval of time.

I'm experiencing a serious case of indecisiveness...



btw, my advice was rather serious. Sounds like a case of thinking too much.

ay girrrrl, yo parents let you date?

quote:

Originally posted by Meat187 I'm experiencing a serious case of indecisiveness... btw, my advice was rather serious. Sounds like a case of thinking too much.

Honestly, I can't decide (lol) if it's a case of thinking too much, or not enough.

Do I need to bite down and just thoroughly think things out so hard that I want to puke and force myself into making a decision? Or, should I just base my opinions solely on initial emotional response (from "the gut")? I don't know... I can't decide! That's the problem!

Also, I don't consider myself to be "unemotional", which is the odd thing about it.

indifference to me is when you say, "meh" or "i don't care"
indecisiveness to me is when you say, "what" or "i don't know"

quote:

Originally posted by tubularbills indifference to me is when you say, "meh" or "i don't care" indecisiveness to me is when you say, "what" or "i don't know"

Well, I didn't really mean to discuss the difference between the two, but rather, the "struggle" with each.

quote:

Originally posted by david.michael Honestly, I can't decide (lol)

why don't you try both for a couple weeks and see how it goes? then perhaps you'll realize there's a happy medium between spontaneity and extreme organization when it comes to decision-making.

quote:

Originally posted by Omega_Blue why don't you try both for a couple weeks and see how it goes? then perhaps you'll realize there's a happy medium between spontaneity and extreme organization when it comes to decision-making.

Happy mediums are my entire problem!

being an indecisive dj and producer makes no sense.

you should maybe add over analyze



david.micheal you forgot to log out ********.

quote:

Originally posted by david.michael Happy mediums are my entire problem!

so try the extremes and see how you feel. personally i think when you're too indifferent and too indecisive (as you seem to describe yourself as being) it could become a stagnation of character.

though i'm shocked that you're able to produce and be satisfied with your end result while being indecisive. that's probably my worst trait as a musician.

It doesn't really seem to affect my creative ability, strangely enough. I never even really thought of it that way.

what's the question?

quote:

Originally posted by iclone what's the question?

I don't care

quote:

Originally posted by iclone what's the question?

There isn't one, really.

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