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i just kicked a possum

so i left my wallet in my car. i go out to get it, as i'm walking i'm hearing this crackling noise, like a cat scratching against wood. so, i keep walking, thinking you know, must be some nightcrawler lurking around. i turn the corner and this mother****** pops out from the corner and hisses, i freak the fuck out, automatically my foot goes into punt mode like mike scrifes and i nail the thing right in the fucking belly. the dude goes flying into the air and lands on it's feet and hisses at me AGAIN, stares at me for a good 10 seconds and runs off.

someone hold me

Re: i just kicked a possum

What the fuck is with Americans talking about past experiences in present tense?

We just aren't teached right I guess.

We aren't teached right anymore.

nothing wrong with that

What's with people fighting the hegemony of non-static communication anyways? The Queen is dead!

Re: i just kicked a possum

quote:

Originally posted by jupiterone

at least since you gave it a good kick in the belly it won't last longer than 4 hrs lol due to ruptured organs haha you win.

Your avatar sucks, Hal. Surely that was intentional anymore.

Re: i just kicked a possum

quote:

Originally posted by jupiterone so i left my wallet in my car. i go out to get it, as i'm walking i'm hearing this crackling noise, like a cat scratching against wood. so, i keep walking, thinking you know, must be some nightcrawler lurking around. i turn the corner and this mother****** pops out from the corner and hisses, i freak the fuck out, automatically my foot goes into punt mode like mike scrifes and i nail the thing right in the fucking belly. the dude goes flying into the air and lands on it's feet and hisses at me AGAIN, stares at me for a good 10 seconds and runs off. someone hold me

So I left my wallet in the car. I went out to get it and as I was walking I heard this crackling noise, like a cat scratching against wood. So I kept walking and thought: 'you know, must be some nightcrawler lurking around.' I turned the corner and this mother****** popped out from the corner and hissed, I freaked the fuck out, automatically my foot went into punt mode like Mike Scrifes and I nailed the thing right in the fucking belly. The dude went flying into the air and landed on its feet and hissed at me AGAIN, stared at me for a good 10 seconds and ran off.

I like to use the present perfect progressive tense. It gets me hot.

this is srs bzns

I have sensed the anguish of this creature.

This possum will kill your family. And it will do it in the right tense.

Had something similar happen to me about 5 years ago. I was at my friend's house for a BBQ. I walked out front to take out some trash, and in broad daylight a fucking racoon walked out of the bushes towards me, snarling like a rabid dog. I guess he smelled the food, and probably had rabies. I was backed against the door and picked up a broom that was laying there.

I wish I could have seen the split screen of my perspective coupled with my friend's; he was in the back yard grilling and all he heard was, "GET THE FUCK BACK!!!" He ran around the house, thinking someone was trying to fight me, and saw me standing over a pulverized racoon holding a broom handle.

quote:

Originally posted by Sunsnail nothing wrong with that

quote:

Originally posted by Renzo I like to use the present perfect progressive tense. It gets me hot.

me too

makes me wanna have period sex

quote:

Originally posted by Brahman I have sensed the anguish of this creature.

but ya we had a possum on our boat in the driveway and it was there whenever i came home at night like in the driveway with thw wheite eyes7

and the fffffffffcuking long tail :nervos|:





i'm drunk

dont let sushipunk see this thread or he'll cry. like a bitch.

hey! id like to drink with stu one day.

ania since ur drunk, i would swing you around dancing a sexy tango. i've always wanted to do that drunk with a girl

My avatar was beautiful.

quote:

Originally posted by Ania_xox me too makes me wanna have period sex

tell me what doesn't make you wanna have dirty sex?

cool stry bro

i actually prefer the remix.

Re: Re: i just kicked a possum

quote:

Originally posted by Domesticated What the fuck is with Americans talking about past experiences in present tense?

its a way of story telling used to make the story more dramatic, to get the reader more involved, by developing a sense of immediacy

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