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The so-called female way of thinking

Dear female TA's,

I hate generalisations, and experience has not always shown me that the way women think is much more different than the way men do. But, there's this widespread belief that the way women see the world is indeed different from the way the other half of humanity deals with it. There's certainly a very sharp cultural division between what's expected from Jack and what Jill is supposed to do, so perhaps there's some truth to this idea that there's this chasm in the two complementing halves of the world think.

There are quite a few myths that are completely unwarranted (such as the idea that women talk more than men), so I do not want any generalisations you read in books full of hasty platonic divisions, such as "Men are from Mars, and Women come from a Hot Hot Planet where they all live in peace and harmony singing Kumbaya". What I want is concrete situations in which you felt most guys had a different way of dealing with things when compared to a group of girls.

For example:

1. Would you say that, whereas men give a lot of value on being around an attractive girl (and eventually bonking one), you want to be the attractive (and eventually be bonked as a sign of your full-blown hotness) as opposed to just being with a hot guy? If you agree, can you think of an occasion in which this was true?
   
   
2. Would you say that, whereas men often talk to one another in order to solve problems, women are more likely to talk just to share and get it off their chest? If you agree, can you think of an occasion in which this was true?

1) 100% True.
And personally I would rather be in the company of another hot woman than a hot guy.
Why?
'Hot guys' are in general boring, shallow and lack substance.
Intellect and humor is the true defining point which renders a guy hot.

2) Women love gossip. Men rarely do unless they are gay.

quote:

Originally posted by chlola 1) 100% True. And personally I would rather be in the company of another hot woman than a hot guy. Why? 'Hot guys' are in general boring, shallow and lack substance. Intellect and humor is the true defining point which renders a guy hot. 2) Women love gossip. Men rarely do unless they are gay.

I'm not sure I made myself clear.

Men gossip just as much, even straight guys. However, when you talk about your own life, there's a myth that men want solution and women want to be comforted. And, regarding the guys, is it more important to you to feel attractive or to be with someone attractive?

Might as well ask a female dog to why she loves doggy-style.

I'd rather feel attractive than not feel attractive but be with someone who is. I would argue that has something to do with 'survival'. Wanting to ensure that our mate doesn't stray etc.

Typically, when I tell people about issues, I often just want to rant and get it off my chest. However, there are times when I do want the other persons' input so as to help resolve the issue. It really depends on the situation.

I can only agree on one thing which isn't what your looking for but maybe it is what we should spend a little more time not taking for granted.

That is the fact that if you are male or female. Both will die in the end.

Re: The so-called female way of thinking

quote:

Originally posted by Lira Would you say that, whereas men give a lot of value on being around an attractive girl (and eventually bonking one), you want to be the attractive (and eventually be bonked as a sign of your full-blown hotness) as opposed to just being with a hot guy? If you agree, can you think of an occasion in which this was true?

What makes a guy "hot" to a girl is different from what makes a girl "hot" to a guy, I think.

I want to be with a "hot" guy but what makes him "hot" has less to do with how he looks and more to do with how he acts, how he commands himself, how he thinks, how he treats me, how he makes me feel, how I make him feel.

quote:

Would you say that, whereas men often talk to one another in order to solve problems, women are more likely to talk just to share and get it off their chest? If you agree, can you think of an occasion in which this was true?[/list]

No, I'm just as likely to discuss problems and look for solutions as I am to "share." But I'm rather private and I don't often feel the need or desire to "share."

marcus, you are a brave man, to engage in this exercise in futility

Show some booty, ladies!

Re: Re: The so-called female way of thinking

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Originally posted by Theresa I'd rather feel attractive than not feel attractive but be with someone who is. I would argue that has something to do with 'survival'. Wanting to ensure that our mate doesn't stray etc. Typically, when I tell people about issues, I often just want to rant and get it off my chest. However, there are times when I do want the other persons' input so as to help resolve the issue. It really depends on the situation.

Well, no differences between the sexes here then. As a woman, do you feel there's something men don't understand?

Apart from the fact that you organise group excursions to public restrooms?

quote:

Originally posted by Echo of Silence What makes a guy "hot" to a girl is different from what makes a girl "hot" to a guy, I think. I want to be with a "hot" guy but what makes him "hot" has less to do with how he looks and more to do with how he acts, how he commands himself, how he thinks, how he treats me, how he makes me feel, how I make him feel.

Do go on.

quote:

Originally posted by Echo of Silence No, I'm just as likely to discuss problems and look for solutions as I am to "share." But I'm rather private and I don't often feel the need or desire to "share."

Well, I guess there's a busted myth right there.

But what do you think is usually strikingly different between the male and the female way of seeing the world? If you do think there's something different to begin with, that is.

quote:

Originally posted by Yohan marcus, you are a brave man, to engage in this exercise in futility

I'm writing a novel and I don't want the female characters to come across as too male

Lira, you should read some Emil Cioran (if you haven't already).

Re: Re: Re: The so-called female way of thinking

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Originally posted by Lira I'm writing a novel and I don't want the female characters to come across as too male

your novel might be better with a shemale. or a jennie

Re: Re: Re: The so-called female way of thinking

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Originally posted by Lira I'm writing a novel and I don't want the female characters to come across as too male

Maybe you should read some novels about women, written by women?

Geeez, Lira! How many times have I told you this? If you post a Slylee-thread or a pseudo-philosophical wank thread then include some titty pics to keep the more sophisticated population of TA (read: me) sufficiently entertained.

Re: Re: Re: The so-called female way of thinking

quote:

Originally posted by Lira Well, no differences between the sexes here then. As a woman, do you feel there's something men don't understand? Apart from the fact that you organise group excursions to public restrooms? Do go on. Well, I guess there's a busted myth right there. But what do you think is usually strikingly different between the male and the female way of seeing the world? If you do think there's something different to begin with, that is. I'm writing a novel and I don't want the female characters to come across as too male

I think men have a tendency to immediately assume they should try to 'fix' the problem when a woman confides in him, rather than just listening to her get something off her chest. It may be partially instinctual (the protector needing to help/save the woman or something to that affect). However, I would bet that when a man confides in another man, he is more likely to listen rather than offer solutions, realizing that the man just wants to vent.

Sometimes I will tell my BF that I just want him to listen to me bitch about something rather than try to 'fix' it. Other times, I confide in him specifically to get his opinion on the matter to help determine how to 'fix' it. Like I said, it really depends on the situation.

Re: Re: Re: Re: The so-called female way of thinking

quote:

Originally posted by Theresa Sometimes I will tell my BF that I just want him to listen to me bitch about something rather than try to 'fix' it. Other times, I confide in him specifically to get his opinion on the matter to help determine how to 'fix' it. Like I said, it really depends on the situation.

Do you make the distinction between the two clear to him?

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The so-called female way of thinking

quote:

Originally posted by kadomony Do you make the distinction between the two clear to him?

Usually, but he can tell now just by the way I approach it. If I am on a full out rant about something, he knows just to let me rant and listen (or at least pretend to). If I want his help, I usually am a lot more calm and am asking him specific questions. It is quite obvious which is which.

Write a novel about a Post OP-Tranny that falls in love with hardcore Lesbian with a mustache named Jr. that likes strap ones.

I agree with Echoes on the men acting hot instead of looking hot.


Men who act hot are so fucking powerful.
A man with mediocre looks can achieve immense hotness with the right ingredients.

The right ingredients according to Ania:

- carries himself with slight arrogance that is in no way offensive
- admits when wrong and doesn't flinch, but recovers quickly
- traditionally chivalrous (opens doors, lets woman walk ahead)
- is aware of the fact that women like to feel that they are in charge, but also need to feel protected - acts accordingly
- likes what he does for a living (there is nothing more unattractive than a man who fucking hates what he does and complains about it ... even if you like what you do for the sole reason that you make a lot of money)
- drives a solid car (Doesn't have to be a BMW, but I'm sorry but you're not going to be hot driving around a clunky piece of shit)
- addresses everyone with courtesy and respect (be it the CEO or the cashier at McDonald's)
- is confident and secure enough that he doesn't feel the need to voice his opinion on everything
- debates successfully

An average Joe with the above qualities becomes fucking Hercules.


I love hot men.
God bless them.

lol @ "debates successfully"

"You're hot, baby, but you couldn't win a debate if your cock was on fire. That made no sense, but your debating skills are so shit, you can't refute it."

You can also just hang out with Renzo and copy everything he does.

Just try not to fall in love with him, for it would be a detriment to women if he were to become gay.

That reminds me of a story my grandfather once told me. He would say, "Renzo, many women will come in and out of your life, but the trick is to never let them fall in love with you."

"Impossible, Grandpa. They will. This is me, after all. Me."

"Hahahahaha good point, Renzo. You're always right with these things. Just always so exquisitely right for being an eight-year old."

I guess I got it, Theresa, thanks

quote:

Originally posted by Meat187 Geeez, Lira! How many times have I told you this? If you post a Slylee-thread or a pseudo-philosophical wank thread then include some titty pics to keep the more sophisticated population of TA (read: me) sufficiently entertained.

Note taken. I'll post a thread specially for you later tonight

quote:

Originally posted by Ania_xox I agree with Echoes on the men acting hot instead of looking hot. Men who act hot are so fucking powerful. A man with mediocre looks can achieve immense hotness with the right ingredients. The right ingredients according to Ania: - carries himself with slight arrogance that is in no way offensive - admits when wrong and doesn't flinch, but recovers quickly - traditionally chivalrous (opens doors, lets woman walk ahead) - is aware of the fact that women like to feel that they are in charge, but also need to feel protected - acts accordingly - likes what he does for a living (there is nothing more unattractive than a man who fucking hates what he does and complains about it ... even if you like what you do for the sole reason that you make a lot of money) - drives a solid car (Doesn't have to be a BMW, but I'm sorry but you're not going to be hot driving around a clunky piece of shit) - addresses everyone with courtesy and respect (be it the CEO or the cashier at McDonald's) - is confident and secure enough that he doesn't feel the need to voice his opinion on everything - debates successfully An average Joe with the above qualities becomes fucking Hercules. I love hot men. God bless them.

Note taken

quote:

Originally posted by MrJiveBoJingles Maybe you should read some novels about women, written by women?

I didn't rule this out. I actually prefer non-fiction to avoid possible "mayo-voyages" as we say in Portuguese. "Factory Girls" is next in my to-read list

quote:

Originally posted by Lira I didn't rule this out. I actually prefer non-fiction to avoid possible "mayo-voyages" as we say in Portuguese. "Factory Girls" is next in my to-read list

What does that mean?

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