TranceAddict Forums (www.tranceaddict.com/forums)
- Chill Out Room
-- Today
Today
I shat for the first time in 6days and it feels glamorous.
Constipation sucks. this was probably the worst I have ever suffered in my life. Whats the longest you have gone without shitting?
5 days.
I had to stick a bottle of fleet enema up my ass to get the blockage to fall out. Really nasty.
enjoy colon cancer.
i shit twice a day
but everytime i travel i get stuffed
and camping something about camping just doesnt work for my ass
Yeah, flying blocks me up as well. Takes about 2 or 3 days to sort the plumbing out.
Happy birthday Eric!
| quote: |
| Originally posted by stren Congratulations, Eric! |
i keep making peanuts.
thanks guys, I'd like to thank my family who was supportive outside the washroom door as they chanted affirmations to me. I'd like to thank the girl who kicked me in the balls who finally got my bowels moving. I'd like to thank all of you the fans I do it all for you!
and my bday isnt till 1 more week. let me enjoy the rest of 29
30th is a fun as fuck birthday Eric. Have someone do it up right. All decade birthdays should be the funnest.
https://www.facebook.com/lefrealebeat
vivid is going to make me famous just like ari gold.
More fibres, man 
10 or 11, without constipation
| quote: |
| Originally posted by zyklon-jay vivid is going to make me famous just like ari gold. |
We could compare shits on the private jet. Being Cor a listers is fun.
We could have cowboy hats, get that job dammit!
https://www.facebook.com/lefrealebeat
probably close to a week for me, but only because of heavy opiate usage, which binds you up like crazy. you (or i did, at least) start to feel sick kinda all day long when you haven't pooped in that long. it's a weird, kinda nauseous, sweaty feeling like just something's not right; i mean, 6 days straight of half-digested food piling on top of more and more fecal blockage.. no good. but when you finally do take that dump, man.
for me, usually it starts out like so- you get a few pebbles of compacted material, and then what i like to call "the blocker"- the actualy compacted piece that was holding everything back. the blocker usually consists of a bunch of the pebbles compressed together in one round-ish unnatural shape, and is like passing a chunk of concrete or granite out your ass, sharp edges and all. THEN comes the 6 days of backup, a combination of diarrhea, soft log, maybe pebbles, whatever, in one humongously long caveman club-like mass of feces. 3/4 of it is lodged in the toilet hole, the rest is sticking out of the water like a half-sunk battleship, or perhaps a beaver dam.. i imagine it's what the titanic looked like halfway through hitting the glacier.
of course, it clogs the toilet damn near 100% of the time, and then you've got another debacle on your hands as diarrhea-stained water overflows the toilet bowl and begins to pour slowly but steadily all over the floor, as you watch in horror at the quickly rising leftover pebbles threatening to float onto the floor as well; and what can you do, until the toilet finishes its flushing process anyways? you can't stop it from refilling. you would've liked to have been wearing a shitty old pair of shorts and shoes while this is happening, but oh no, not your luck today- your socks and pant legs are starting to soak in the muddy waters as you frantically back yourself off into a corner of the bathroom, trying to avoid the quickly spreading poo-solution all over the floor. where's the damned mop?? shit, you left it in the kitchen last week- a carpeted hallway and living room away, also inadvertently threatening to soak poop-water footprints (and the rapidly approaching puddle closing in on the small space at the foot of the door) in to itself. it's one of the few times you're both metaphorically AND literally in deep shit.
i hate when that happens.
3 days is my personal record (I was travelling in the Amazon, and it felt like a good idea )
Happy independence day, Eric!
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Omega_Blue |
| quote: |
| Originally posted by Omega_Blue probably close to a week for me, but only because of heavy opiate usage, which binds you up like crazy. you (or i did, at least) start to feel sick kinda all day long when you haven't pooped in that long. it's a weird, kinda nauseous, sweaty feeling like just something's not right; i mean, 6 days straight of half-digested food piling on top of more and more fecal blockage.. no good. but when you finally do take that dump, man. for me, usually it starts out like so- you get a few pebbles of compacted material, and then what i like to call "the blocker"- the actualy compacted piece that was holding everything back. the blocker usually consists of a bunch of the pebbles compressed together in one round-ish unnatural shape, and is like passing a chunk of concrete or granite out your ass, sharp edges and all. THEN comes the 6 days of backup, a combination of diarrhea, soft log, maybe pebbles, whatever, in one humongously long caveman club-like mass of feces. 3/4 of it is lodged in the toilet hole, the rest is sticking out of the water like a half-sunk battleship, or perhaps a beaver dam.. i imagine it's what the titanic looked like halfway through hitting the glacier. of course, it clogs the toilet damn near 100% of the time, and then you've got another debacle on your hands as diarrhea-stained water overflows the toilet bowl and begins to pour slowly but steadily all over the floor, as you watch in horror at the quickly rising leftover pebbles threatening to float onto the floor as well; and what can you do, until the toilet finishes its flushing process anyways? you can't stop it from refilling. you would've liked to have been wearing a shitty old pair of shorts and shoes while this is happening, but oh no, not your luck today- your socks and pant legs are starting to soak in the muddy waters as you frantically back yourself off into a corner of the bathroom, trying to avoid the quickly spreading poo-solution all over the floor. where's the damned mop?? shit, you left it in the kitchen last week- a carpeted hallway and living room away, also inadvertently threatening to soak poop-water footprints (and the rapidly approaching puddle closing in on the small space at the foot of the door) in to itself. it's one of the few times you're both metaphorically AND literally in deep shit. i hate when that happens. |
the only reason you guys are laughin' is because it's happened to all of us at one time or another and you KNOW it.
I keep expecting to see a picture of Matt Lauer when I open this thread.
Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright © 2000-2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.