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-- Just Something To Break The "Serious" Threads
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Posted by Hybrid Junkie on Sep-09-2002 05:04:

Cool Just Something To Break The "Serious" Threads

I'm bored and just thought I'd put something interesting in here which wouldn't really suit the Chillout/Web Page section due to it's reference to sydney.....

Enjoy..

Basic Rules for Driving in Sydney.


1.Do not use indicators. Turning signals will only give away your
next move. A real Sydney driver never uses them.

2.Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between
you and the car in front of you. This is considered to be a
waste of precious road space. Another motorist will fit in that
space anyway, and that means another person getting there before
you do!

3. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane-change is
considered "going with the flow".

4.a) After a traffic light turns red, a minimum of three vehicles
must run it.
b) The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the
chance you have of getting hit.

c) Never take a green light at face value. Always look left and
right before proceeding.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive
bodywork. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and as late as possible to
ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot
massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without
ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.

7. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions
and are apparently not enforceable in the metro area during rush
hour.

8. Please remember that there is no such thing as a shortcut
during rush-hour traffic in Sydney.

9. Always slow down and rubber-neck when you see an accident or
even someone changing a tyre.

10. Everybody thinks their vehicle is better than yours,
especially 4WD drivers.

11. Learn to swerve as Sydney is the home of high-Speed Slalom
Driving thanks to the Roads and Traffic Authority, which puts
potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them
on their toes.

12. It is traditional in Sydney to honk your horn at cars that
don't move within several nanoseconds of the light changing
green.

13. Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of
way.

14. Remember that the goal of every Sydney driver is to get there
first, by whatever means necessary.

15. Contrary to local belief, talking on your mobile phone whilst
driving is not illegal. In fact, it is arbitrary that at least
20 percent of all motorists must be on their cell phones at any
one time.

16. Real Sydney women drivers can shave their legs, put on
pantyhose and apply eye makeup at 75kph in bumper-to-bumper
traffic (whilst on the phone).


*Backlash From Webmeister Pending heheh*


Posted by Itchy on Sep-09-2002 05:12:

i just hope you didn't write that yourself.......... otherwise you need to get out more............


Posted by Hybrid Junkie on Sep-09-2002 05:15:

Lol, nah I didn't


Posted by DJ_Ballistic on Sep-09-2002 05:18:

wtf you talking bout

THAT'S GOLD I TELLS YA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Posted by Philby on Sep-09-2002 07:17:

hehehe nice


Posted by JoeCool on Sep-09-2002 07:59:

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive
bodywork. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

ahahahhaha so very true


Posted by ascension on Sep-09-2002 10:27:

Re: Just Something To Break The "Serious" Threads

quote:
Originally posted by Hybrid Junkie

1.Do not use indicators. Turning signals will only give away your
next move. A real Sydney driver never uses them.




hahahahah i can just picture this in a car full of drunken loons


LEFT!!............... NO RIGHT!!!!!!......RIIIIIGHT...... NOOOOOOOOOO LEFFT!!!!!!!!!!!






ummm


Posted by matt_a on Sep-09-2002 10:39:

hahahahaha very true

Is it true that in Melbourne you have to turn right from the left lane? I heard that this is a road rule in some places.


Posted by DJ Mikey Mike on Sep-09-2002 10:39:

LMAO!


Posted by Philby on Sep-09-2002 10:53:

quote:
Originally posted by Trancey Ash
hahahahaha very true

Is it true that in Melbourne you have to turn right from the left lane? I heard that this is a road rule in some places.


you fuckin sydney poofta fuckin! you dun know hoook turn fuckin?!?? fuckin sydney!! hook turn!!!!

huh? what are you on about man!?!?!?!??

hook turn sydney poofta!! turn right from left lane!!!


Posted by matt_a on Sep-09-2002 11:12:

Woah philby calm down man. i was just wonderin as ive never seen it in sydney. and i dunno whether its good or bad cause ive never had to do it. btw i only just got my L's so how the fuck would I know?
chill man


Posted by Renegade on Sep-09-2002 11:49:

Haha, I don't think he was being serious Ash.

And yeah, hook turns suck. I've been known to go several blocks out of my way just to avoid doing one...... :-/


Posted by fzrr on Sep-09-2002 12:09:

hehehe...you Mexicans drive funny down there


Posted by Ves on Sep-09-2002 12:24:

Hahaha...that's heaps funny Hybrid Junkie!

Hmmm...I could have got my Ls two months ago, but I can't be bothered reading the book and learning all those rules and stuff...ahh well!


Posted by narcism on Sep-09-2002 12:58:

quote:
Originally posted by Renegade


And yeah, hook turns suck. I've been known to go several blocks out of my way just to avoid doing one......


HAHAH i do that aswell....


Posted by Fraggle on Sep-09-2002 13:00:

heheheh #7

meh...4 traffic accidents & a speeding fine...and i get my gold licence this month LOL!!!


Posted by webmeister on Sep-09-2002 13:02:

haha u kids on ur L's .. i have a gold license

and yeah that is hella funny .. no angry backlash from me philby mate

I read somewhere that the shortest interval of time known to man is actually the time between the traffic light turning green and the driver behind you honking his/her horn.

And don't get me started on women drivers


Posted by webmeister on Sep-09-2002 13:05:

quote:
Originally posted by Fraggle
heheheh #7

meh...4 traffic accidents & a speeding fine...and i get my gold licence this month LOL!!!



omg .. i thought u couldn't get ur golds until you hadn't been booked for 5 years or something...

i'm currently sitting on 0 accidents and 0 fines/offences
can't believe i've never been booked, and i always drive 15-20kph over the limit


Posted by Fraggle on Sep-09-2002 13:11:

*whispers*

heh...i really shoulda lost it after the speeding incident...130 in an 80 zone

...but yeah, i thought no black marks for 5 years 'til u get ur gold too...but i'm not complaining...it's like $122 for 5 year gold, or $91 for a 3 year silver


Posted by DJ Mikey Mike on Sep-09-2002 13:13:

quote:
Originally posted by webmeister


I read somewhere that the shortest interval of time known to man is actually the time between the traffic light turning green and the driver behind you honking his/her horn.



lol. this thread is killing me


Posted by DJ Mikey Mike on Sep-09-2002 13:18:

quote:
Originally posted by Fraggle
*whispers*

heh...i really shoulda lost it after the speeding incident...130 in an 80 zone

...but yeah, i thought no black marks for 5 years 'til u get ur gold too...but i'm not complaining...it's like $122 for 5 year gold, or $91 for a 3 year silver



80!!!! Fuck that. in uk the fastest we can go is 70. Too slow


Posted by webmeister on Sep-09-2002 13:22:

70kph??

my god that's nothing .. i do 130k's down the freeway sometimes

although i spose in the UK u have all the nazi speed camera cops and shit, luckily we don't have it that bad YET


Posted by narcism on Sep-09-2002 13:30:

quote:
Originally posted by webmeister

And don't get me started on women drivers



yes plz don't
we aint all that bad


Posted by Philby on Sep-09-2002 13:31:

quote:
Originally posted by Trancey Ash
Woah philby calm down man. i was just wonderin as ive never seen it in sydney. and i dunno whether its good or bad cause ive never had to do it. btw i only just got my L's so how the fuck would I know?
chill man


lol i guess you never watched 'pizza' on sbs.....


Posted by matt_a on Sep-09-2002 13:39:

quote:
Originally posted by InAcoma

yes plz don't
we aint all that bad


hahahahahahahahahaha

quote:
Originally posted by Philby

lol i guess you never watched 'pizza' on sbs.....


Na I only caught a few episodes but I can't remember that. I thought you were being serious. You were so convincing. hahahahaha


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