Just remain calm - TranceAddict Forums

TranceAddict Forums (www.tranceaddict.com/forums)
- Humour / Funny Stuff / Cool Web Sites
-- Just remain calm

Posted by Eugene on Sep-27-2002 23:41:

Just remain calm

JUST REMAIN CALM....

In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. Haiku poetry has strict
construction rules: each poem has only 17 syllables; 5 syllables in the first, 7 in the second, 5 in the third. They are used to communicate a timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity. Here are 15 actual error messages from Japan that are the essence of Zen:

>> >
>> > Your file was so big.
>> > It might be very useful.
>> > But now it is gone.
>> > -------------------------------------------
>> > The Web site you seek
>> > Cannot be located,
>> > but Countless more exist.
>> > --------------------------------------------
>> > Chaos reigns within.
>> > Reflect, repent, and reboot.
>> > Order shall return.
>> > -----------------------------------------------
>> > Program aborting:
>> > Close all that you have worked on.
>> > You ask far too much.
>> > ------------------------------------------------
>> > Windows NT crashed.
>> > I am the Blue Screen of Death.
>> > No one hears your screams.
>> > --------------------------------------------------
>> > Yesterday it worked.
>> > Today it is not working.
>> > Windows is like that.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > First snow, then silence.
>> > This thousand-dollar screen dies
>> > So beautifully.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > With searching comes loss
>> > And the presence of absence:
>> > "My Novel" not found.
>> > --------------------------------------------------
>> > The Tao that is seen
>> > Is not the true Tao-
>> > until You bring fresh toner.
>> > --------------------------------------------------
>> > Stay the patient course.
>> > Of little worth is your ire.
>> > The network is down.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > A crash reduces
>> > Your expensive computer
>> > To a simple stone.
>> > --------------------------------------------------
>> > Three things are certain:
>> > Death, taxes and lost data.
>> > Guess which has occurred.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > You step in the stream,
>> > But the water has moved on.
>> > This page is not here.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > Having been erased,
>> > The document you're seeking
>> > Must now be retyped.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > Serious error.
>> > All shortcuts have disappeared.
>> > Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------

Aren't these better than "your computer has performed an illegal operation"?

Posted by Azareal on Sep-27-2002 23:55:

Ha! Good stuff. I suppose I should come up with one of my own:

Microsoft hates you.
Windows and Bill Gates hate you.
Should have bought a Mac.

~Azareal

Posted by DJ Mikey Mike on Sep-28-2002 00:17:

Re: Just remain calm

quote:
Originally posted by Eugene

>> > ---------------------------------------------------
>> > Having been erased,
>> > The document you're seeking
>> > Must now be retyped.
>> > ---------------------------------------------------

haha i like this one. hehe

Posted by Lira on Sep-28-2002 02:34:

KPYTO!!! KPYTO!!! KPYTO!!!

Eugene, you just made my day

Posted by PhaseFour on Sep-28-2002 02:36:

omg LOL!!!

niiice eugene!

Posted by smh on Sep-28-2002 19:16:

*giggles*

Posted by dr me on Sep-28-2002 21:44:

Posted by Technaut on Sep-28-2002 22:01:

it reminds me of this..

Posted by DJ Mikey Mike on Sep-28-2002 22:08:

heh. tech hav u seen the geordie version of that? hehe very funny

Posted by Technaut on Sep-28-2002 22:34:

nah i aint seen the geordie version of that. it sounds like it woud be a good laff tho.

Posted by piggy on Sep-29-2002 23:00:

aha, good one Technaut!

Bullshit bin! ROFL!

Posted by SpykeChyld on Oct-01-2002 21:58:

Re: Just remain calm

quote:
Originally posted by Eugene

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

ROFL, thats friggin hilarious. When I get my comp up Imma make an error message that says that! lol. Very Monty Python-ish, lol.

Posted by Linx_da_cat on Oct-01-2002 22:06:

lol that's class eugene good find.

>> > Yesterday it worked.
>> > Today it is not working.
>> > Windows is like that.

that's my fave

Posted by Technaut on Oct-05-2002 11:55:

quote:
Originally posted by piggy
aha, good one Technaut!

Bullshit bin! ROFL!

it was some guy in the Aussie forum that posted that in there.

u should check out that forum sometimes, some funny guys in there.

Posted by imprt2nr on Oct-06-2002 23:10:

all that haiku is too true, windows sucks but its the only thing in know how to use. to bad microsoft has a monopoly over everything in the computer business. that australian thing is funny too