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Facebook is being creepy

I'm used to tenuous "People You May Know" from Facebook. But I just glanced at it and there was a suggestion with no mutual friends, but a vaguely familiar name. I clicked on it and it turns out to be some girl I had a very brief fling with almost three years ago. Now, how the fuck has Facebook connected us?

1. No mutual friends, networks, groups, anything connecting our accounts.

2. We've never been friends on Facebook or any other social media.

3. Her number was only ever saved in a prehistoric phone from 2002 I was using at the time because my actual phone had been stolen. The number was deleted from my SIM card years ago.

The only thing I remember doing was a vague bit of Internet perving where I Googled her name and found a Twitter account, but my laptop has been reformatted since then and it's not even as though my Google account is connected to my Facebook account in any way. Is this sheer coincidence or evidence of the mind-blowing extent to which everything on the Internet is cross-referenced and synchronised?

Coincidence probably. If it was someone at the other side of the world maybe it wouldn't be.

Whenever you're logged into your Facebook account, they will track every site you visit. Assuming that you were logged into Facebook at the time, you finding her Twitter account could easily have been enough for them to connect you, especially if her Twitter account is linked to her Facebook.

Yes, you're probably right Stu. I'd love to say I've slept with so many girls that a random suggestion would inevitably be a former conquest, but sadly that's a long way from the truth.

I know it's all algorithms and a human eye probably never looks at any of the accrued data, but it is still slightly eerie to witness a website patiently logging everything you do and then bringing it back up again years later when you'd practically forgotten about it yourself.

If you aren't already, you should use a browser addon like ghostery or disconnect to keep third party cookies from tracking you, by the way. It's not just Facebook, these are incredibly common now, since regular internet ad rates keep plummeting.

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J Yes, you're probably right Stu. I'd love to say I've slept with so many girls that a random suggestion would inevitably be a former conquest, but sadly that's a long way from the truth. I know it's all algorithms and a human eye probably never looks at any of the accrued data, but it is still slightly eerie to witness a website patiently logging everything you do and then bringing it back up again years later when you'd practically forgotten about it yourself.

I suppose the other possibility is that she's been looking you up

Fuckin Facebook.

quote:

Originally posted by Silky Johnson Fuckin Facebook.

Is that the one they advertise on porn sites?

Lol

Under setting you have to uncheck creep mode

Not sure about creepy, more like this is what they do. It's what drives FaceBook. Totally disturbing. Can't wait to get the hell off Facebook.

I'll be the sceptic and say it was most likely a statistical fluke.

If your experience has been anything like mine, Facebook's friend suggestion algorithm is really weird: It apparently suggests friends at random now, unlike the early days when it would seek those users you share most mutual friends with. Having given up on this approach (maybe the programmers assume you don't need any help meeting people you share so many friends with), it trawls people's profiles for data, often with bizarre results.

In my case, it often picks strangers from cities my foreign friends live. Mind you, they don't have to share any mutual friends (often they do share one though). For whatever reason, Facebook really wants me to befriend people in Thailand, which makes me wonder what the system thinks I do in my holidays.

If your friends are mostly English, and specially from your area, it's just a matter of time until people you've met show up on the list. Whether or not you had a fling with them is probably irrelevant. I'm sure there are way more false positives than you've managed to keep track of.

Either that or Skynet wants you to procreate. You know she fancies already, so it will only make Skynet's work easier.

Hey Jack, Facebook just listed you in my "people you may know" section

See!? And we all know Sys is a bot!

I rest my case.

quote:

Originally posted by Sushipunk Hey Jack, Facebook just listed you in my "people you may know" section

My God.

I had a further trawl through its People You May Know and the only other person I found on there was a girl I went on one date with over two years ago - and I didn't even know her full name! Really no idea how it's doing this.

Skynet

the girls in my People You May Know section...should be retitled, Whores You May Know

Jack you've been in my people you may know several times. :P

Also yeah, even if it was a while ago and you reformatted, facebook probably snagged the search you did on her name at some point.

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J Really no idea how it's doing this.

Ever heard people say the world is a small place? Relax

Sure, there are 1 billion users on Facebook, but the people you interact with share more with you than you may imagine, thus slimming down the numbers considerably. It's just like birthday problem: You'd expect to find 2 out of 367 people to share a birthday (366 days + the extra person), but in reality it's much much easier. Likewise, the people you meet are only slightly removed from you, even if it's just a quick snog (if all people on Earth are arguably 6 friends removed from you, it's safe to say people from your city are probably much closer).

This isn't creepy, at all. This is exactly what you'd expect with time

I'd buy that if there were lots of people coming up on the list who I shared no mutual friends or networks with, but there's practically no one out of hundreds of recommended people. And the two there are just so happen to be very brief romantic interests? It's also worth noting that I deliberately keep a pretty low number of friends on Facebook and only about 40% of them even live in the same city as me, so it's not like there's a huge amount of information that will inevitably lead to coincidences.

There must be some sort of cross-referencing going on here. Perhaps when I had a smart phone with a Facebook app on a previous phone it cross-referenced numbers saved on my SIM?

I've had some weird stuff when I've logged into Facebook on a new phone, with it somehow adding 'contacts' that were neither Facebook friends or numbers that should have been on a SIM (they had once been but were deleted before the SIM was put into a new phone).

I'd guess your Facebook app on a previous phone was in contact with the numbers on the SIM at the time and remembered them, even after you deleted her number.

If Facebook wasn't a requirement for me to easily keep in touch with people all over the world, I'd delete it in a second. I fucking hate it and all this cross-referenced identity shit.

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J I'd buy that if there were lots of people coming up on the list who I shared no mutual friends or networks with, but there's practically no one out of hundreds of recommended people.

I get randoms on my list all the time... You don't!?

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J And the two there are just so happen to be very brief romantic interests? It's also worth noting that I deliberately keep a pretty low number of friends on Facebook

Well, this could have something to do with our different experiences too. I definitely have the opposite approach (I've never pruned the number of Facebook friends ever since I registered), and the algorithm doesn't seem to get me that well

quote:

Originally posted by SYSTEM-J There must be some sort of cross-referencing going on here. Perhaps when I had a smart phone with a Facebook app on a previous phone it cross-referenced numbers saved on my SIM?

That's a possibility. I don't use Whatsapp because it automatically added everyone whose number I had on my phone - maybe Facebook did the same behind your back.

My phone isn't exactly a smartphone, so I'll never know. If you're so concerned about your privacy though, I strongly recommend downgrading to a pleb-phone like mine. It's cheap (reason I bought it), sturdy, and it makes phone calls.

Oh Lira

Facebook can suk it.

i am the chosen one

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