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-- Some humor in these terrible times ...

Some humor in these terrible times ...

Did anybody ever play that retarded Command and Conquer: Renegade game (I think it was renegade, might have been red alert 2) Anyway, remember when you could either control the sonic dolphins if you were american or the giant squid if you were soviet as "military" units? Then you were like wtf were they thinking that's so fucking retarded that I'm using a dolphin to attack a submarine. Anyway ... from CNN

quote:

A British military spokesman said Tuesday that coalition forces have full control of Umm Qasr, the southern entry point for humanitarian aid. The U.S. Navy will bring in trained dolphins this week to hunt for seaborne mines in the waters around Umm Qasr, Navy officials said. The animals will seek out floating mines and mark them for Navy divers to inspect.

There's a pretty funny picture of a "marine" dolphin jumping out of the water too.

http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/meast...main/index.html

Wow, that's just beautiful

haha ,... good stuff

I'm sure the PETA people are pissed, these mines will make tuna look saints.
Afterall, I'm confident Saddam will deploy his tuna fishers to counter this US move.

quote:

Originally posted by Yoepus I'm sure the PETA people are pissed, these mines will make tuna look saints. Afterall, I'm confident Saddam will deploy his tuna fishers to counter this US move.

LOL


Yeah I've been told of this, guess a dog is a man's best friend... even in waters! (I guess only the Israelis'll understand)

quote:

Did anybody ever play that retarded Command and Conquer: Renegade game (I think it was renegade, might have been red alert 2) Anyway, remember when you could either control the sonic dolphins if you were american or the giant squid if you were soviet as "military" units? Then you were like wtf were they thinking that's so fucking retarded that I'm using a dolphin to attack a submarine. Anyway ... from CNN

Now it's up to Saddam to start using giant squids for defence.

Btw, it was red alert 2. I remember that game well because of the whole array of retarded units. But I guess one of them was not so retarded after all.

quote:

Originally posted by DrUg_Tit0 Now it's up to Saddam to start using giant squids for defence. Btw, it was red alert 2. I remember that game well because of the whole array of retarded units. But I guess one of them was not so retarded after all.

Haha yes I can't wait until saddam starts rolling the tesla tanks out of baghdad.

quote:

Originally posted by occrider Haha yes I can't wait until saddam starts rolling the tesla tanks out of baghdad.

HAHAHA!!!!!

Picture Saddam's troops all in red, with the tanks streaked with red etc... lol classic C&C ...

Yeah I played the Renegade game for 15 minutes this weekend and I think it blows. First of all I've been totally turned off to war games forever now, which incidentally happened before the Iraq war - though the war today only strengthens my decision.

Second, from a purely gaming perspective, I totally don't like the "3D" view because it's so awkward! Secondly it seems to me that there is much less information on screen at one time, as in you can't see that many units etc.

And is it just me or do the graphics look blotched and a little nasty? It's not really as sharp as the 2D C&C. If I had to play another C&C game, give me RA2 anyday.

And where is the story?!?!?!?!?

The (IMO) HALLMARK of the older C&C games were the hilarious storylines!

E.g. a scene from the RA2 opening movie (easily the cheesiest and funniest C&C story of them all):

(President gets message that PM is throwing their entire military at US)
(President calls Russian PM)
President: You're throwing everything you've got at us!!!
Russian PM: But mr. President, whatever do you mean?

LMAO!

And yet, as I understood it, there is NO story in Renegade. Pretty dumb, IMO, takes away the entire point of it all.

P.S. lol giant squids are hilarious.. WATCH OUT! I bet Saddam has old Soviet giant squids in hiding somewhere... waiting....biding his time... until the US gets nice and settled at sea... totally unsuspecting anything.....then one day....WHAMMO!!!!! A giant mofo squid starts humping a carrier... BOOYA!!! "Take that America", cries out Saddam!

But he'll probably be dead by then...

ugh..this war....

LOL I just thought of something else!

And when the squids start humping the US carriers and whatnot, Bush will issue a new statement:

quote:

"Dear Americans, unfortunately our coalition forces have been ruthlessly and unjustly attacked by terrorists of the ocean, those giant squids. We must fight back this menace of the ocean. We have been terrorised by sea-dwellers for too long. They are striving to destroy our democracy, our way of living. They are a threat to world peace. We must declare war on the squids and on the ocean!!!!!"

(In case someone doesn't get it, it's a satire on the whole War On Terrorism - because really, a "war on terrorism" is just as futile and useless as a war on a body of water)

THEY CALLED HIM FLIPPER........FASTER THAN LIGHTNING......YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111


tHE Dolphins rulez

quote:

In case someone doesn't get it, it's a satire on the whole War On Terrorism - because really, a "war on terrorism" is just as futile and useless as a war on a body of water)

Let's not start intermingling politics with humor now

hehe the us army marketing people are geniuses, putting such a lovely animal (who hates dolphins after all?) in the imagery of war... they draw sympathies from the general audience... but those PETA people must be so pissed. just a thought!

quote:

Originally posted by ahlamalek hehe the us army marketing people are geniuses, putting such a lovely animal (who hates dolphins after all?) in the imagery of war... they draw sympathies from the general audience... but those PETA people must be so pissed. just a thought!

Well I don't think that this is a marketing ploy that was newly created right as war was starting. I can think of far better PR programs if America desired to garner support. If the US was trying to draw sympathy by saing "look at us we use Dolphins!" I'll shoot myself in the foot. My guess is that dolphins probably ARE effective in finding and tagging sea mines.

quote:

Originally posted by occrider Let's not start intermingling politics with humor now

Agreed

quote:

My guess is that dolphins probably ARE effective in finding and tagging sea mines.

That's very true! The thing is that no matter how advanced technology is, the sea is a very untamed element that is unpredictable and largely unknown. So I would guess there are not a lot of mine-detecting capabilities as far as machines go.

So why not use a dolphin, a product of millions+ years of evolution? It certainly knows its way around the ocean.

Plus dolphins are incredibly intelligent, and have a massive brain:bodymass ratio, so they could learn how to detect mines, who to contact, and procedures like that.

So I think it's entirely possible that these dolphins are actually very successful in finding mines.

(On the other hand, I'd bet squids would be next to useless in any armed forces, as they would be just as liable to "attack" your own ships as anyone else's...lol...)

quote:

Originally posted by Alccode (On the other hand, I'd bet squids would be next to useless in any armed forces, as they would be just as liable to "attack" your own ships as anyone else's...lol...)

Thats why in Red Alert C&C they had those collars on them - one would assume you would "buzz" them a high voltage shock everytime they wanted to get their grove on and hump your own ships.

And you thought they were being funny!

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