Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
Q: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den
and I'm thinking
about buying a computer.
A: Mac?
Q: No, the name's Lou.
A: Your computer?
Q: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
A Mac?
Q: I told you, my name's Lou.
A: What about Windows?
Q: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
A: Do you want a computer with Windows?
Q: I don't know. What will I see when I look at
the windows?
A: Wallpaper.
Q: Never mind the windows. I need a computer
and software.
A: Software for Windows?
Q: No, on the computer! I need something I can
use to write
proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do
you have?

A: Office.
Q: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend
anything?
A: I just did.
Q: You just did what?
A: Recommend something.
Q: You recommended something?
A: Yes.
Q: For my office?
A: Yes.
Q: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
A: Office.
Q: Yes, for my office!
A: I recommend Office with Windows.
Q: I already have an office with windows! OK,
let's
just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type
a proposal. What
do I need?

A: Word.
Q: What word?
A: Word in Office.
Q: The only word in office is office.
A: The Word in Office for Windows.
Q: Which word in office for windows?
A: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
Q: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you
don't
start with some straight answers, OK, forget that. Can
I watch movies on
the Internet?

A: Yes, you want Real One.
Q: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I
watch is none of
your business. Just tell me what I need!
A: Real One.
Q: If it's a long movie, I also want to watch
reels
2, 3 and 4. Can I watch them?
A: Of course.
Q: Great! With what?
A: Real One.
Q: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a
movie. What do I do?
A: You click the blue "1".
Q: I click the blue one what?
A: The blue "1".
Q: Is that different from the blue "w"?
A: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue "W" is
Word.
Q: What word?
A: The Word in Office for Windows.
Q: But there are three words in "office for
windows"!
A: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word
in the world.
Q: It is?
A: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other
Words left. It
pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.

Q: And that word is real one?
A: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One
isn't even part
of Office.
Q: STOP! Don't start that again. What about
financial
bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money
with?
A: Money.
Q: That's right. What do you have?
A: Money.
Q: I need money to track my money?
A: It comes bundled with your computer.
Q: What's bundled with my computer?
A: Money.
Q: Money comes with my computer?
A: Yes. No extra charge.
Q: I get a bundle of money with my computer?
How
much?
A: One copy.
Q: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
A: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
Q: They can give you a license to copy money?
A: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

(A few days later)...
: Super Duper computer store. May I help you?
Q: How do I turn my computer off?
A: Click on "START"...